Ever not been taken as serious relationship material because the sex was too "porno"?

[concupisys]

one thing that comes to mind while reading this thread is the fact that there are some out there who have a hard time separating sex and love.... that isn't a bad thing, but often times it can cause a person who can't separate the two to regret having a casual encounter because they think that it ultimately will lead in to a relationship.... in these casual experiences, the people involved are acting on impulse, and don't realize the personal ramifications of what they're doing until after the experience is over.... next thing you know: all kinds of bells and whistles are going off and the first impulse at that point is to break it off and get as far away from the situation as they can....

to the OP: if you don't regret having this experience, then simply learn from this experience and move on.... other people you hook up with won't react in this way, but if you are in to casual one-time sex on the first date then you simply have to understand that these after effects are going to be a possibility....

 

[JR7]

It seems like Manlybannisters and concupsys have opposite viewpoints which is the beauty of lpsg. Manlybannisters puts the cause on me while concupsys says that of the women that engage in high degree sexual activity on the first date, there is a good portion of them that regret the act(s) afterwards where perhaps that guilt/shame was suppressed during the rush of passion before and during the act(s). I don't discount either view, but I do think that females are more likely to surface with regret after going 'too far' too soon. I put quotes around too far because I, for one do not think anything is too far on a first date if both people want to engage in it.

And it's not a hard and fast rule. I was with a woman who I not only 69-ed twice on the first date, but fingered her asshole while eating her out. She went out with me 4 more times including that year's Valentine's Day.

 

[ManlyBanisters]

con seems careful to 'people', not 'women' - I liked that in his post. Do we have to make this another bullshit thread about how women fall in love with anything they fuck? Seriously... because if that was the case I'd be married to a lump of silicon.

 

[ColonialBoy]

When I called to set up a second date, surprise surprise - she said she couldn't get into a relationship with a guy she blew three times in one night. "So why did you do it," I inquired. She didn't really know, but she said that sometime between the 2nd and 3rd 69 session she just figured this would just be for fun and not a relationship. Lesson learned - only two 69's in one evening from then on.

Its called Anti Slut Defense.
whats the best way to melt her Anti slut defence - Natural Game Forum by Zan Perrion

 

[JR7]

Interesting article. But I have always been more impressed by what society might consider 'slutty' behavior than prudishness. So I've never not been attracted to a female because she went "too far" "too soon" with me. The more the quicker was always my motto.

To this day, my wife thinks she went too far with me on our first date. I keep telling her, I wouldn't have called her for a second date had she not at least did what we did. It wasn't even that far - she got naked, let me finger her all night and didn't even take my cock out. Hell, when I tried to go down on her the first night she rebuffed my advance. Still she thought spending the night even though we didn't fuck and getting naked was too far. All's well that ends well, I say.

 

[JR7]

bump

 

[B_625girth]

I was in a "strictly sex" relationship with an engaged gal when I was younger, and it went the opposite way. after about 6 weeks, she told me she was in love with me.

 

[D_Jacqueline_Boozanne]

The quality (or poorness) of the sex has never been a deciding issue. But, in any relationship where I made the first move and then sex got heavy quick, things never really progressed.

 

[JR7]

Ahh, the eternal drawback of this kind of sex, Hypertextual - it's usually one and done. Perhaps you can lend your female perspective here as to why that's the case. But, yes, when I have had this happen before the date (or even fast sex/oral after the first date) all too often I never get a second date. For a while I thought it was a slight against my ability in bed until I asked one of these women ...

When I was in college, I met a girl, Julia, at a party and sure enough we went back to my place. I really liked this girl and wanted to date her, so as I started to eat her pussy on this occasion before our first date, I got concerned. I stopped and said, "I really want to go down on you, but I also want to see you again. So do you think if we keep doing this you'll still want to go out with me later?" To which she said, "Yes, absolutely." So I proceeded to lick her pussy and we switched into 69. We 69'ed twice before the sun came up, and unfortunately I never got to go out with her again.

I did manage to get her on the phone long enough to ask why she wouldn't go out, after she said "absolutely," when I asked her about the future in bed. She said that she could tell from the first couple of licks that I really knew how to eat pussy and it had been a long time since a guy just ate her out for the sake of eating her out and not just as quick foreplay before intercourse. So basically she was going to say anything to keep the cunnilingus going. Throwing me a bone she said she did cum three times from my going down on her. But, alas, no 'first date.'

 

[JR7]

bump

 

[JR7]

bump

 

[JR7]

bump

 

[JR7]

bump

 

[VernalTiger]

bump

bump

bump

bump

bump

Let sleeping threads die, dude.

 

[JR7]

Why should this post die? I would think on lpsg, there wouldbe dozens of stories of this kind?!

 

[Scarlet Thelema]

I think it's a great question, and an interesting issue. I've experienced it, as well.

I've been involved with several guys (not all at the same time :tongue who I had great sex with. We did not always have sexual contact on the first date, although a couple of times that was the case (kissing, petting and/or oral sex). After we did have sex, however, upon discussing it later, I was seen as not being 'girlfriend material' because the sex was indeed so intense. I found that confusing - what's wrong with being the proverbial 'good girl' yet being a 'bad girl' when it comes to sex?

Perhaps there is an inclination to believe that if a woman truly enjoys sex, and is able to lose herself in the moment, that she can't be monogamous? I don't know.

 

[martin60018]

next time act of sex #1 is to show her how much money you got.
everything will go as planned after that

 

[JR7]

Thank you, Scarlet Thelemena for responding with your own account. I'm sorry that happened to you. Sounds like the guy was unconfident in his own sexual prowess. But it was interesting to hear this happens to women too. Glad to hear you have no issues with oral on the first date. I have been with too many females who had no problem 69-in two or three times in an evening who then surface with some kind of guilt the next day. I don't know - maybe they think there's such a thing as sucking too much cock in one night. And invariably, if they swallowed each time they didn't go out again. Again, I don't know - maybe in the moment women loved the taste and showmanship of swallowing my load, but then had a semen hangover or something the next day.

 

[JR7]

Albeit a very delayed response, Scarlet Thelema, but I often have found women who fully enjoy sex and lose themselves in the moment not to be very monogamous. Although I never disliked them because of it. I just remember (especially in college and shortly thereafter) that there were some awfully attractive women who I had excellent sex or 69-sessions with but when I tried to get them to be exclusive they didn't want to trade their single lives and abilities to hook up with multiple partners. I was pleased that many of them 'kept me on the roster' and though they didn't full-out commit to me, as long as I kept knocking, they always made the time for some repeat performances! Of course, that was a double-edged sword. I loved getting the pussy, but I would long to get it all the time and to the exclusion of other guys. So eventually the 'friend with benefits' thing would die down.

 

[JR7]

I don't understand your response, livefreeandfun. Could you explain?