Explain This To Me

[13788]

hung_big:

Originally posted by Axex+Jun 14 2005, 09:43 PM--><div class='quotetop'>QUOTE(Axex &#064; Jun 14 2005, 09:43 PM)</div><div class='quotemain'>

Originally posted by hung_big@Jun 14 2005, 07:12 PM
<!--QuoteBegin-db03

@Jun 14 2005, 03:13 PM
Complete lack of relevence to Knights story.

[post=320551]Quoted post[/post]​

Read up man. If you read other threads, you would see why I posted that.

I told him not to take her back, because it&#39;s obviously unrequitted love (him loving her, but none in return). I also saw a post where he says she is trying to get back in his pants.

It&#39;s actually quite directly linked.

Thanks for your lack of input. I think you need to get yourself either ( a ) a pair of glasses or ( b ) take a comprehension test and educational course.

Thanks.

[post=320653]Quoted post[/post]​

That seemed a bit mean . Be nice and play happily . We&#39;re a community&#33;

[post=320697]Quoted post[/post]​

[/b][/quote]

I&#39;m nice most of the time; he just made a rather rude remark to myself and Jon, while we were clearly helping Knight out AND were making sense, contrary to what he thinks.

Much Love for you though

 

[MASSIVEPKGO_CHUCK]

Originally posted by db03@Jun 14 2005, 10:01 PM
It wasnt a callous remark.

[post=320626]Quoted post[/post]​

Would you then accept it as an unnecessary remark?

 

[db03]

Originally posted by hung_big+Jun 14 2005, 11:12 PM--><div class='quotetop'>QUOTE(hung_big &#064; Jun 14 2005, 11:12 PM)</div><div class='quotemain'><!--QuoteBegin-db03@Jun 14 2005, 03:13 PM
Complete lack of relevence to Knights story.

[post=320551]Quoted post[/post]​

Read up man. If you read other threads, you would see why I posted that.

I told him not to take her back, because it&#39;s obviously unrequitted love (him loving her, but none in return). I also saw a post where he says she is trying to get back in his pants.

It&#39;s actually quite directly linked.

Thanks for your lack of input. I think you need to get yourself either ( a ) a pair of glasses or ( b ) take a comprehension test and educational course.

Thanks.

[post=320653]Quoted post[/post]​

[/b][/quote]

There&#39;s no need to start throwing insults..and believe me you do not want to go there with me. (Especially today)

An educational course eh??

Please.

 

[13788]

Goon:

Originally posted by jonb+Jun 13 2005, 08:26 PM--><div class='quotetop'>QUOTE(jonb &#064; Jun 13 2005, 08:26 PM)</div><div class='quotemain'><!--QuoteBegin-naughty@Jun 10 2005, 01:57 PM
I have a title for you, Borderline Personality Disorder. Look it  up .Learn the facts. Run for you life.

[post=319577]Quoted post[/post]​

I diagnosed BPD back when he first described the "It&#39;s over -- Don&#39;t leave me&#33;" behavior. In fact, one book about BPD is called I Hate You, Don&#39;t Leave Me. BPD is marked by:

*Identity crisis, often contradictory self-perception
*Extreme dependency
*Self-injury or attempted suicide
*Self-destructive behavior, not including SI or attempted suicide
*At least two addictions
*Black-and-white worldview, tendency to blow things out of proportion
*Mood swings so intense they forget what any other mood is like
*Absence of psychosis

The classic treatment is lithium, one of many reasons BPD is confused with bipolar disorder.

[post=320382]Quoted post[/post]​

[/b][/quote]

(Dusts off counselor hat)
I&#39;m not a counselor anymore but I used to be. My specialty was youth ages 13-24. I must tell you that 95% of Borderline Personality Disorder cases are females. During my years practicing as a counselor I NEVER had a male Borderline client (and I had many). Paul, I was exactly the same as you with my first major girlfriend. She was like this gash that keeps stringing you along. I held on because I was terrified of being alone, deep down felt like nobody wanted me and had NO self esteem/self confidence. That came with age and experience but mostly working out my demons: coming from an alcoholic family and being bipolar. I smell some sort of substance abuse in your family. Alcohol is a substance too. I&#39;d need more history to hone in on your problem. The big difference between a Borderline and a Bipolar is that the Borderline seems to have no conscience (sociopathic behavior). You&#39;ve gotten great advice here. I hope you get a chance to work on yourself. You&#39;re a great guy.

 

[Knight]

Thanks Goon

Yeah I think BPD might have something to do with the media and all the images of sexy ladies. Women are probably more susceptible to it than men.

And there hasn&#39;t been any substance abuse in my family lol just a history of absent fathers that went off and had more kids that give you strange and distant relations that you don&#39;t like explaining

So yeah I&#39;m sometimes anxious, although it was compounded by a few events and I&#39;m trying to get over it I was called ugly a lot when I was younger lol, and still think I am (I know lol crazy but I do).

There you have it...I have a therapy session tomorrow. Hopefully everything will work out. I want to talk to the ex and just find out how she&#39;s doing but i sha&#39;n&#39;t

 

[13788]

hung_big:

Originally posted by db03+Jun 15 2005, 12:59 PM--><div class='quotetop'>QUOTE(db03 &#064; Jun 15 2005, 12:59 PM)</div><div class='quotemain'>

Originally posted by hung_big@Jun 14 2005, 11:12 PM
<!--QuoteBegin-db03

@Jun 14 2005, 03:13 PM
Complete lack of relevence to Knights story.

[post=320551]Quoted post[/post]​

Read up man. If you read other threads, you would see why I posted that.

I told him not to take her back, because it&#39;s obviously unrequitted love (him loving her, but none in return). I also saw a post where he says she is trying to get back in his pants.

It&#39;s actually quite directly linked.

Thanks for your lack of input. I think you need to get yourself either ( a ) a pair of glasses or ( b ) take a comprehension test and educational course.

Thanks.

[post=320653]Quoted post[/post]​

There&#39;s no need to start throwing insults..and believe me you do not want to go there with me. (Especially today)

An educational course eh??

Please.

[post=320883]Quoted post[/post]​

[/b][/quote]

Oh, but that would be interesting.

It&#39;s more than clear to most that I&#39;d verbally rape you. Comon, I&#39;ve been needing a good laugh and a sub-par stimulation of my brain. I enjoy blowing people out of the water in semi-amusing fashion.

 

[db03]

[post=320883]Quoted post[/post]​

[/quote]
Oh, but that would be interesting.

It&#39;s more than clear to most that I&#39;d verbally rape you. Comon, I&#39;ve been needing a good laugh and a sub-par stimulation of my brain. I enjoy blowing people out of the water in semi-amusing fashion.

[post=321097]Quoted post[/post]​

[/quote]



Correction, What&#39;s clear to most is that you&#39;re a creepy little boy.

Verbally rape me eh?

Give it your best shot bitch.

 

[KinkGuy]

Hey db03, who pissed in your Wheaties? If you have serious, valid issues with someone on the board, send them a personal message. If you don&#39;t enjoy reading a particular thread, don&#39;t. Especially if what you have to say has nothing to do with what has been posted, but is just a personal attack. There are people on here who can&#39;t stand moi and a few I can do without. And you know what? Ignoring each other or settling our real differences "off board" has worked every time.

 

[13788]

hung_big:

Correction, What&#39;s clear to most is that you&#39;re a creepy little boy.

Verbally rape me eh?

Give it your best shot bitch.

[post=321210]Quoted post[/post]​

Please, enlighten me...who thinks I&#39;m a "creepy little boy"?

And please try to use people whose opinion matter to me...meaning not you, for one.

And verbally rape you...I&#39;ve yet to have to, but having used the word "bitch", having a total of 22 words in your post and total lack of correct grammar and capitalization shows me you aren&#39;t the brightest proverbial crayon in the box. Nice wit you got there, eh?

And let us remember, you started this with an unecessary, callous remark, nitpicking at Jon and myself who, if you haven&#39;t noticed are smarter than you.

 

[steve319]

*sigh*

Pay no attention to the squabbling, Knight. These fellows don&#39;t know when to take this out of the public forum. They probably don&#39;t mean to be disrespectful of your needs here.

I&#39;m glad to hear that you&#39;re giving therapy a try. I&#39;m a big believer in psychiatric treatment, and I think that if you get a good therapist that you can feel comfortable with that you stand a good chance of getting a grip on the situation and improving your own understanding of things.

We are all in your corner, man&#33; Know that we&#39;re pulling for you in this.

 

[budday]

knight:

i have had to deal with an unhappy girl who was unstable/suicidal/etc recently and it was one of the most profoundly disturbing incidents in my life. the situation was a lot more complex than the one sentence above, but suffice to say that in 1 stress-counselling session and 1 phonecall with a lawyer i felt TOTALLY reassured that the problems were not of my creation.

so listen because this is really key to understanding how this relationship worked and why things went so wrong:

none of this is your fault. and now she&#39;s not with you so please, don&#39;t spend a lot of time thinking about her or the problems she creates. just deal with those if/when they arise for the brief 5 seconds it takes to politely ask her to leave you alone.

if she is anywhere near as messed up as my stalker, this will actually help her in the long run to seek the professional guidance and care she needs.

all the best,
budday

PS. knight i look remarkably like you. so don&#39;t give us any nonsense about being ugly because i was always told i was absolutely beautiful. and it will NOT do to shatter this paradigm&#33;

 

[titan1968]

I want everyone to look at these prophetic lyrics. Song? BORDERLINE by Madonna.&#33; LOL&#33;



Naughty, I can relate to that song- I am certain that others can too. When I was a teenager, I was head over heels in love with my (first) girlfriend. She meant the world to me, but she toyed with me, she manipulated me, and I always went back for more. Fortunately, I woke up years later (at 17) and put an end to that destructive relationship. It took me a very long time to get over her and heal on the inside.

When I hear that song now, I just smile, and think that it was another learning experience.

A little advice for Knight: Show that girl the door&#33; You deserve better than what she has to offer. If you stay with her, you will lose your self-respect and self-confidence- I have been there...

 

[db03]

Originally posted by hung_big@Jun 17 2005, 02:36 AM

Correction, What&#39;s clear to most is that you&#39;re a creepy little boy.

Verbally rape me eh?

Give it your best shot bitch.

[post=321210]Quoted post[/post]​

Please, enlighten me...who thinks I&#39;m a "creepy little boy"?

And please try to use people whose opinion matter to me...meaning not you, for one.

And verbally rape you...I&#39;ve yet to have to, but having used the word "bitch", having a total of 22 words in your post and total lack of correct grammar and capitalization shows me you aren&#39;t the brightest proverbial crayon in the box. Nice wit you got there, eh?

And let us remember, you started this with an unecessary, callous remark, nitpicking at Jon and myself who, if you haven&#39;t noticed are smarter than you.

[post=321391]Quoted post[/post]​

I&#39;ve been in France for the weekend actually having a life, so i&#39;ve forgotten what this was about. Frankly I don&#39;t care anymore.

Oh, and just for your information, I graduated top of my class and I&#39;m currently studying for TWO degrees.

So obviously you are MUCH smarter than me. B)

 

[madame_zora]

Okay, can we please get beck to Knight now?


Hey baby, a lot of us here had absentee fathers and it really does make us insecure in a lot of ways. I was talking to a friend today about how when you&#39;re young, your first time love is such an overwhelming wave of emotion, so new and incredibly powerful. We think that person is the biggest deal on Earth, but then we get our expectations damaged, they become human and flawed in some way, and we look at our next love with sightly less "romantic" eyes and more practical ones. Still each one is deathly important until you&#39;ve had a few. It&#39;s then that you realise that you could have interesting people of very different kinds, there isn&#39;t just one "soulmate"- God, I hate that word&#33; We grow up believing that that one perfect person exists for us somewhere, and if we fuck it up we&#39;ll never be happy again. Then some time sets in, and we are able to reflect on what we liked and didn&#39;t like about that person and think about that when we begin dating again. Being in love with a person is something of a decision. A lot of different things might make one person more appealing to you than others, but you&#39;ll find that it won&#39;t be the same things about each one.

All I&#39;m saying is, as hard as it seems now, your next one will probably be a little better fit to you because you&#39;ve had this experience. As long as we take some insights away from an experience, it is not wasted time. I hope you found a few things out about yourself and applaud you on the journey of discovering more. I hope your sessions go well, I got some of my best insights into myself from a set ot them.

 

[Alley Blue]

Originally posted by madame_zora@Jun 20 2005, 09:13 AM
Okay, can we please get beck to Knight now?

[post=322379]Quoted post[/post]​

haha Its funny how a thread can go "south"

I forgotten what this thread was all about.....had to check the initial post 2 or 3 times.........

 

[db03]

Apologies to Knight for hijacking his thread.

 

[husky14620]

Originally posted by aloofman@Jun 10 2005, 10:15 PM
The only thing I can add is this: if you ever talk to her again, don&#39;t mention it here. I think I speak for some others when I say that we&#39;re tired of hearing about her. If you keep seeing her - or even talking to her - in spite of the near-unanimous LPSG opinion that you stop, then we cease to be a support group and instead become the place you just go to complain.

[post=319645]Quoted post[/post]​

Not everyone feels this way, Knight.

Yes, many are upset that you aren&#39;t "taking" their advice. So what? You&#39;re young, maybe a little foolish, and still growing up. You&#39;re bound to seek advise that you won&#39;t heed, at least at first.

I thought the name of this forum included the word SUPPORT&#33; That is what you have been seeking, and it is what you should get. I know it isn&#39;t easy to accept advise, even when you seek it out. Especially regarding someone you have feelings for. ( I know,, never end on a preposition, tough&#33; ).

I know you will try to stop seeing and talking to this girl. I also know that you will go through many rounds of this, as it is VERY difficult to give up on a lengthy relationship. Stop beating yourself up at the very least. Go out and have many good times without her. Meet many young women, and date several. When you find one with many common interests, spend extra time with her. And who knows, maybe you&#39;ll make her so jealous she&#39;ll wish she&#39;d grown up sooner.

"Mother"

 

[13788]

IrishSurfer:

[post=320883]Quoted post[/post]​

Oh, but that would be interesting.

It&#39;s more than clear to most that I&#39;d verbally rape you. Comon, I&#39;ve been needing a good laugh and a sub-par stimulation of my brain. I enjoy blowing people out of the water in semi-amusing fashion.

[post=321097]Quoted post[/post]​

[/quote]



Correction, What&#39;s clear to most is that you&#39;re a creepy little boy.

Verbally rape me eh?

Give it your best shot bitch.

[post=321210]Quoted post[/post]​

[/quote]


db03,

Aontaim leis an raiteas seo.

Cuig deag bliana d&#39;aois??? Mo thoin&#33;

Banacht libh&#33;

 

[Freddie53]

Knight,

You are a great guy. I won&#39;t tell all the great things I see in you from your posts because what I need to say would get lost.

You are capable of real love. Dying for someone. Giving everything you have. etc. It is a great atribute. Dont&#39; lose the character that drives that trait.

However, in love, you get what you get. Romantic relationships can&#39;t be based on the premise that you will change her. She is who she is. I can tell that you so much want to fix what is wrong with her. You can&#39;t help someone who refuses to help themselves or accept help.

I admire you so much for wanting to stay in this relationship and make it work. It shows such character. But right now it is a dead end street. I know how painful it is to walk away from this girl with the possibility you might not ever see 0r talk to her again.

But everyone here agrees you must do it. And you can. Truth is you deserve so much better than what she is.

When you described how tender and loving and considerate you were of her on your first sexual encounter I thought, "if I were a girl, I would want a guy like that." Many guys your age are interested in only one thing. Getting off themselves. They never think about the girl or really care. Yet you put her totally first in that sexual act.

You deserve much better than what she is. Look for Ms. Right. She is out there.

Once you find her, you will wonder what you ever saw in this girl.

Freddie

 

[B_hungrick]

Originally posted by Knight@Jun 15 2005, 05:04 PM
Thanks Goon

Yeah I think BPD might have something to do with the media and all the images of sexy ladies.  Women are probably more susceptible to it than men.

And there hasn&#39;t been any substance abuse in my family lol just a history of absent fathers that went off and had more kids that give you strange and distant relations that you don&#39;t like explaining

So yeah I&#39;m sometimes anxious, although it was compounded by a few events and I&#39;m trying to get over it   I was called ugly a lot when I was younger lol, and still think I am (I know lol crazy but I do).

There you have it...I have a therapy session tomorrow.  Hopefully everything will work out.  I want to talk to the ex and just find out how she&#39;s doing but i sha&#39;n&#39;t

[post=321044]Quoted post[/post]​

Hey Knight,

Sometimes we guys don&#39;t take care of ourselves very well emotionally. I&#39;m really glad to hear that you&#39;re doing just that. Good for you. I admire you.

It&#39;s not about your ex any more. It&#39;s now about you and learning how to deal with past that relationship, and going to the next part of your life.