fakerape

[Ryder239]

Petite hit the nail on the head...it's about her animal lust and being taken by a man. Women do not desire this about someone they do not know, but rather someone they know and trust to overpower and dominate them while still avoiding any real physical or psychological harm. Where do you think the well worn phrase "Harder, deeper, fuck me!" came from?

 

[B_curiousme01]

I honestly don't know what to call it.

Not this one. But I did get beyond the fear...mostly.

It scares me that some girls are agreeable to "fakerape." I don't think badly of anyone who likes this, it just makes me have more fear that a guy could read the wrong messages and try this with a person who is not sexually open and does not have the benefit of an LPSG for discussion.

I liked the reply from Bananaclubcock. I think most people here are open to new sexual experiences and use the forums to investigate options. It's good.

I'm open to all kinds of sex. This one just hits me hard and as someone who has been through this, I can say that I have never, ever - even once - fantasized about it or relived it in a positive light.

If you come across a thread here from someone who was raped and has fantasies about it, please let me know. I would like to read it/them.

Rape involves real life violence. Not some make believe fantasy lover who does only what you want him to do when and how you want it. In real life, some women end up dead after being raped. Almost always they are beaten. I know this is a long way from the discussion here but rapists are out there. If one reads something like this, I think he will be able to have more ammo to back up his justifications.

So change the wording and call it rough sex? The point is, this kind of play is consensual. Rape is not.

From what I've seen in forums, women who have experienced sexual abuse/sexual assault are just as likely to fantasise about this as any other women.

curiousme, you're right that not every woman is into it. For some it would be their worst nightmare. And even for those who want it, it can turn into their worst nightmare. This sort of play is serious (if fun) stuff, and needs to be discussed thoroughly beforehand, even with someone who IS into it.

 

[B_subgirrl]

It scares me that some girls are agreeable to "fakerape." I don't think badly of anyone who likes this, it just makes me have more fear that a guy could read the wrong messages and try this with a person who is not sexually open and does not have the benefit of an LPSG for discussion.

I can see why it would scare you. The thought of someone using a discussion like this as an excuse for raping someone is horrifying. I guess nothing can really be done about them - they will always find an excuse for their actions (although there is none).

For those who might possibly interpret someone's message wrong, the key is

CONSENT
​

And just like you learn in sex ed, consent is NOT about reading messages, or thinking that fantasy = real life desire for a sex act. Many people fantasise about this but would NEVER want to do it. Consent is getting a clear and definite 'YES, I would like to do this and it's NOT just a fantasy'. Consent is discussing what is and isn't acceptable in a scene. Consent is going through EVERY SINGLE major detail, and many of the minor ones. Consent is about having a safe word or signal, and stopping when the person uses it. Consent is about aftercare. It is ALL ABOUT consent.

And people need to be careful about who they play with. Something of this kind of depth should only be done with someone you trust with your life, because that is essentially what you're doing - putting your life in their hands.

I'm open to all kinds of sex. This one just hits me hard and as someone who has been through this, I can say that I have never, ever - even once - fantasized about it or relived it in a positive light.

Understandable that it hits you hard *hugs*

If you come across a thread here from someone who was raped and has fantasies about it, please let me know. I would like to read it/them.

I've sent you a PM.

Rape involves real life violence. Not some make believe fantasy lover who does only what you want him to do when and how you want it. In real life, some women end up dead after being raped. Almost always they are beaten. I know this is a long way from the discussion here but rapists are out there. If one reads something like this, I think he will be able to have more ammo to back up his justifications.

I know, and agree. Hopefully that person would also take notice of my big old paragraph about consent, but I'm probably hoping in vain.

 

[TomCat84]

wife and I had been married for about 9 months(fucking for 2 yrs prior) when one night she said."you just never take me." I said explain yourself. she said, "just throw me down and have your way with me." so I thought okay, and I didn't want to jump her right away after talking about it, cuz should would be expecting it. anyway, I think it was about 11am on a spring Saturday morning. we got home from the store, and were straightening our little house. she had put shorts on for the first time of the season and was bra less. I saw my opportunity coming up, I got a massive erection, shoved her on the bed, held her hands over her head with my arm, with my other hand I openen my pants, shoved her underwear and shorts out of the way, and jammed my cock in her. the look of surprise in her eyes, the little gasp of pain as I shoved it in, she got super wet real quick, and came a few minutes later.

what I found she really liked, was getting it from behind while standing at the sink or ironing board. she said if she was just in her house coat, and I parked/buried my cock between her ass cheeks, it really turned her on. many times, she held on to the sink or stove while I piledrived her. broke one ironing board, and many times we finished fucking on the kitchen floor. my black neighborlady saw some of our kitchen action a few times. kidded with my wife over the back fence about it. she was way cool. btw, we're white.

That story got me hard as a rock

 

[B_curiousme01]

I understand what the fantasy is here, but I simply cannot connect the word "Rape" with "Consent." In real life, it simply does not work that way. What is described here is a sexual fantasy where one is in a submissive role and the other dominate. It excludes fear, random acts of violence, and in fact, has nothing to do with "rape" as the world at large understands it.

I just wanted to put out there that not every female wants to have this experience - fantasy or not - so that the men who read this can know there are some who simply don't get off on it.

I'll back out of here and leave you all to enjoy your fantasy without me adding a further negative to it. this one just hit really close to home.

Again, I do understand a female wanting to be submissive, but it is not rape by any stretch of the imagination.

I did want to share this below from Wikipedia.

From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia


This article is about a form of sexual assault. For other uses, see Rape (disambiguation).


In criminal law, rape is a type of sexual assault usually involving sexual intercourse, by one person against another person without that person's consent. According to the American Medical Association (1995), sexual violence, and rape in particular, is considered the most under-reported violent crime.[1][2] The rate of reporting, prosecution and convictions for rape varies considerably in different jurisdictions. The U.S. Bureau of Justice Statistics (1999) estimated that 91% of U.S. rape victims are female and 9% are male, with 99% of the offenders being male.[3] In one survey of women, only two percent of respondents who stated they were sexually assaulted said that the assault was perpetrated by a stranger.[4] Several studies argue that male-male and female-female prison rape are quite common and may be the least reported form of rape.[5][6][7]
When part of a widespread and systematic practice, rape and sexual slavery are recognized as crimes against humanity and war crimes. Rape is also recognized as an element of the crime of genocide when committed with the intent to destroy, in whole or in part, a targeted ethnic group

I can see why it would scare you. The thought of someone using a discussion like this as an excuse for raping someone is horrifying. I guess nothing can really be done about them - they will always find an excuse for their actions (although there is none).

For those who might possibly interpret someone's message wrong, the key is

CONSENT
​

And just like you learn in sex ed, consent is NOT about reading messages, or thinking that fantasy = real life desire for a sex act. Many people fantasise about this but would NEVER want to do it. Consent is getting a clear and definite 'YES, I would like to do this and it's NOT just a fantasy'. Consent is discussing what is and isn't acceptable in a scene. Consent is going through EVERY SINGLE major detail, and many of the minor ones. Consent is about having a safe word or signal, and stopping when the person uses it. Consent is about aftercare. It is ALL ABOUT consent.

And people need to be careful about who they play with. Something of this kind of depth should only be done with someone you trust with your life, because that is essentially what you're doing - putting your life in their hands.




Understandable that it hits you hard *hugs*




I've sent you a PM.




I know, and agree. Hopefully that person would also take notice of my big old paragraph about consent, but I'm probably hoping in vain.

 

[435782]

EVERY woman I have been with has expressed interest in me taking control in an overly aggressive manner. I do not know if this fits into the "fake rape" scenario or not. And the first time I did it with each woman was a little scary because I didn't know how they would react. But all of them liked it and we kept it as part of our bedroom fun. Some ladies liked it more than others. Some liked it rougher than others. Ironically, the one who liked it the most and roughest was the most far-left, liberal chick I have ever met. She would wax poetic about equality of the sexes and then want me to take her anyway I wanted while I called her names, etc. Different strokes for different folks.

 

[Bbucko]

For those who might possibly interpret someone's message wrong, the key is

CONSENT
​

And just like you learn in sex ed, consent is NOT about reading messages, or thinking that fantasy = real life desire for a sex act. Many people fantasise about this but would NEVER want to do it. Consent is getting a clear and definite 'YES, I would like to do this and it's NOT just a fantasy'. Consent is discussing what is and isn't acceptable in a scene. Consent is going through EVERY SINGLE major detail, and many of the minor ones. Consent is about having a safe word or signal, and stopping when the person uses it. Consent is about aftercare. It is ALL ABOUT consent.

And people need to be careful about who they play with. Something of this kind of depth should only be done with someone you trust with your life, because that is essentially what you're doing - putting your life in their hands.

I sorta specialize in this kind of play, and it is totally, completely play.

However, going over every detail turns role play into a script, which is like reenacting something someone saw once in porn: not my thing. The difference between playing from a script and playing from a menu is that all-allusive moment I refer to as "the real". Extreme play is entirely dependent on "the real", at least as it's practiced by my sundry beaux and me.

"The real" involves breaking through into a new, profoundly moving territory and is generally cathartic. Catharsis does not happen when all details are pre-planned in advance, at least not for me; it necessitates spontaneity and a creative approach.

Fakerape is a lot like humiliation, except that it's much more physical, brutal, even. It's been requested by different guys I've been with before, and I've agreed in theory but never actually followed up on it precisely because of issues involving "how far is too far" and safe words, which I understand but dislike using IRL. The reality is that I'm short and lean enough that, at any time, anyone who I'm with can get up and leave (and I'm not a fan of incapacitating bondage). Endurance ultimately comes down to the bottom, and I rarely misjudge their capacities (the few times I have are also the few times I've felt genuine shame).

Because consent is so important to me, I'm very upfront about what I'm about and what I expect, but generally leave the details undefined enough to allow for at least the possibility of catharsis to occur spontaneously. If, for instance, a guy is genuinely disturbed by choking he lets me know immediately and I don't continue: the same applies to slapping or spitting. I am only brutal to those who wish to be brutalized.

 

[mexdude]

Nice tread, i didnt knew that some women liked this kind of intercourse

 

[B_subgirrl]

However, going over every detail turns role play into a script, which is like reenacting something someone saw once in porn: not my thing. The difference between playing from a script and playing from a menu is that all-allusive moment I refer to as "the real". Extreme play is entirely dependent on "the real", at least as it's practiced by my sundry beaux and me.

"The real" involves breaking through into a new, profoundly moving territory and is generally cathartic. Catharsis does not happen when all details are pre-planned in advance, at least not for me; it necessitates spontaneity and a creative approach.

Fakerape is a lot like humiliation, except that it's much more physical, brutal, even. It's been requested by different guys I've been with before, and I've agreed in theory but never actually followed up on it precisely because of issues involving "how far is too far" and safe words, which I understand but dislike using IRL. The reality is that I'm short and lean enough that, at any time, anyone who I'm with can get up and leave (and I'm not a fan of incapacitating bondage). Endurance ultimately comes down to the bottom, and I rarely misjudge their capacities (the few times I have are also the few times I've felt genuine shame).

Because consent is so important to me, I'm very upfront about what I'm about and what I expect, but generally leave the details undefined enough to allow for at least the possibility of catharsis to occur spontaneously. If, for instance, a guy is genuinely disturbed by choking he lets me know immediately and I don't continue: the same applies to slapping or spitting. I am only brutal to those who wish to be brutalized.

I totally get where you're coming from. To be honest, as long as I was playing with someone who knew me (and I would be), I wouldn't feel the need to go over the details in the way I described because I would feel they already knew my limits. I might remind them of my hard limits though, just to make sure. And I'd ask if they intended to introduce anything REALLY new and different, just to make sure. However, while there are plenty of things that don't turn me on, there's very little sexually that would freak me out. And in a different kind of thread I would have been likely to say this in the first place.


But discussing the details IS the way many people play, and I feel it's the sensible advice to give to newbies or people who aren't sure. I think if you don't know each other and each others no-go areas sexually EXTREMELY intimately this is the way to go. It doesn't necessarily need to be script like - more of a checklist of things that MIGHT be included, aimed particularly at any activities you haven't already tried together outside of a fakerape scene. For instance, is the sub okay with knife play? With various forms of bondage? With gagging? With involving others in the scene? With play involving urine, feces or blood? What kinds of language is the sub comfortable with and what sort of scene are they looking for? Some may be looking for a 'boyfriend comes home and has to have you scene'. Some may be looking for a 'stranger has to have you scene'. Others may want a kidnap scene or a stranger breaks in scene or a 'you're such a slut, you asked for it' scene. If you know each other well (IRL or from online) you could probably answer these questions already - I expect my FB could about me - but if you don't know your partner as well . . . I've just read too many accounts of fakerape going wrong because of a lack of understanding of each other to dismiss in depth discussions entirely, even though they aren't REALLY my thing.

And safe words/signals? I've never felt the need for one myself. But the only partner I've played with that intensely can read me like a book. I believe he'd recognise and change in my body language or vocal tone instantly. The orgasms stopping might be a clue as well.

 

[Bbucko]

I totally get where you're coming from. To be honest, as long as I was playing with someone who knew me (and I would be), I wouldn't feel the need to go over the details in the way I described because I would feel they already knew my limits. I might remind them of my hard limits though, just to make sure. And I'd ask if they intended to introduce anything REALLY new and different, just to make sure. However, while there are plenty of things that don't turn me on, there's very little sexually that would freak me out. And in a different kind of thread I would have been likely to say this in the first place.


But discussing the details IS the way many people play, and I feel it's the sensible advice to give to newbies or people who aren't sure. I think if you don't know each other and each others no-go areas sexually EXTREMELY intimately this is the way to go. It doesn't necessarily need to be script like - more of a checklist of things that MIGHT be included, aimed particularly at any activities you haven't already tried together outside of a fakerape scene. For instance, is the sub okay with knife play? With various forms of bondage? With gagging? With involving others in the scene? With play involving urine, feces or blood? What kinds of language is the sub comfortable with and what sort of scene are they looking for? Some may be looking for a 'boyfriend comes home and has to have you scene'. Some may be looking for a 'stranger has to have you scene'. Others may want a kidnap scene or a stranger breaks in scene or a 'you're such a slut, you asked for it' scene. If you know each other well (IRL or from online) you could probably answer these questions already - I expect my FB could about me - but if you don't know your partner as well . . . I've just read too many accounts of fakerape going wrong because of a lack of understanding of each other to dismiss in depth discussions entirely, even though they aren't REALLY my thing.

And safe words/signals? I've never felt the need for one myself. But the only partner I've played with that intensely can read me like a book. I believe he'd recognise and change in my body language or vocal tone instantly. The orgasms stopping might be a clue as well.

You and I are largely on the same page, SG :wink:

One of the things that really hit home with me reading your reply is how much I avoid playing with n00bs: it's much too great a responsibility. Having said that, though, we're each on our own journey, and what you or I may classify as Dom or sub are all just points on the continuum. I just dislike breaking guys in when they're totally green.

I have a good friend whom I know to be a responsible and thoughtful person, a professional who has devoted years of his life to maintaining access to health care for people living with HIV. In many ways, he's a pillar of our community down here. He also has a penchant for finding naive young men and throwing them into the deep end of the pool in terms of extreme sex with little or no preparation. We recently had some time to socialize, and he brought that very subject up in conversation relative to a certain boyish man in his late 20s in our mutual acquaintance.

In what was a revealing moment of complete honesty, he looked me in the eye and said that he needs to stop such aggressive tactics with guys who have no idea ahead of time exactly how far he'd go (which is pretty much as far as I'd go with an experienced and skilled sub powerbottom). He told me that someday his passion will take him "too far"; by the look in his eyes I think that he already has once or twice. That's a game I just don't play.