This question is for everyone, though maybe the most complex answers will come from the gay members of this board
I have three children, all adults now, and I think a lot about what those kids have meant to me over the years and to my ever more complex understanding of what being a man involves. But I know some straight guys who dont want children (not to mention guys who dont even want a committed relationship), I know gay guys who do want children, I know guys who are afraid to have children, etc., etc. There are lots of permutations here.
But I dont think weve talked about this here on this forum, and there are an awful lot of interesting guys here whose opinions can make one reflect
So my question is: How does fatherhood fit into your concept of masculinity or manhood?
If you are young and single [gay or straight], or a bit older and attached but so far childless, or any other combination -- do you see yourself as wanting kids, siring kids, and parenting kids at some point in the future, or is fatherhood not something that you see as important to you, or to the full masculine experience? Is having a committed relationship with an S/O enough in itself, or for you, is having children something youd really like as part of the experience of being a man? Will you feel you have missed something critical if it doesnt happen? If you cant have children in the usual way (both partners contributing DNA), either because of no partner, an infertile partner, being infertile yourself, or a same-sex partner, would you look to adoption or surrogacy in order to explore yourself as a father?
Cottonfield
I have three children, all adults now, and I think a lot about what those kids have meant to me over the years and to my ever more complex understanding of what being a man involves. But I know some straight guys who dont want children (not to mention guys who dont even want a committed relationship), I know gay guys who do want children, I know guys who are afraid to have children, etc., etc. There are lots of permutations here.
But I dont think weve talked about this here on this forum, and there are an awful lot of interesting guys here whose opinions can make one reflect
So my question is: How does fatherhood fit into your concept of masculinity or manhood?
If you are young and single [gay or straight], or a bit older and attached but so far childless, or any other combination -- do you see yourself as wanting kids, siring kids, and parenting kids at some point in the future, or is fatherhood not something that you see as important to you, or to the full masculine experience? Is having a committed relationship with an S/O enough in itself, or for you, is having children something youd really like as part of the experience of being a man? Will you feel you have missed something critical if it doesnt happen? If you cant have children in the usual way (both partners contributing DNA), either because of no partner, an infertile partner, being infertile yourself, or a same-sex partner, would you look to adoption or surrogacy in order to explore yourself as a father?
Cottonfield