A man was taking golf lessons one day. He swung the driver and hit it 150 yards. "What did I do wrong?" he asked. "Hold the club gently", said the pro." like you hold your wife's breasts." The man took the advice and hit it 275 yards. That night he told his wife about the lesson. The next day she went out for a lesson, too. She swung her driver and hit the ball about 50 yards. "No, no, you're gripping it way too hard", said the pro. "Hold the club like you would your husband's penis." The woman took the advice and swung the club. WHUMP, she hit it 300 yards. The pro said: "Thats Great, now take the golf club out of your mouth!!!"