Feeling Confused!!???

Discussion in 'Relationships, Discrimination, and Jealousy' started by Amber1, Feb 1, 2009.

  1. Amber1

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    Okay....

    So I dnt know how much anyone is going to be able to help me???

    I met this guy at my friends house a week ago and we hit it off!!

    He was an old friend of hers and we stayed up drinking just me and him...and we talked for hours and then we ended up havin like a big hug.

    Yeah just a hug!!

    But then eventually one thing lead to another and we got a bit frisky!!

    No we didn't go all the way....

    Anyway we decided we would like to see each other and stayed in touch and he kept texting me alot since then...

    But my friend started slagging him off afterwards, saying he was unreliable and stuff.

    All of a sudden it seemed he could do no right although she kept tellin me she didn't want me to get hurt by him.

    Then the next thing I know she says she went to the pub for one drink with him and grabbed his fone when he went to the bar and saw a text from another woman on there.....

    So I confronted him with this and he said it was an ex and that he really likes me and wants to see me still.

    The next day she tells me he slept at her house that night, as he was at another friends and drove her home...and that he kept sayin that he was a" free agent" and that I was "alright" when she asked about me.

    And she seems to think he likes her...despite him texting me all week.

    So when I confronted him with it.....

    He said she "had been trying to sleep with him that night!!!"


    I honestly don't know what to think of these people....

    She is supposed to be one of my bestfriends,

    I thought he seemed quite nice and we mite be able to have some fun together maybe a bit more.

    Plus we hit it off in a friendly way and he has a son the same age as mine ...so that is a bit dissapointing too!!

    According to her, he is unnattractive and she wouldn't even go there...

    he totally protests his innocence and put up quite a fight about it!!


    I'm beginning to wonder if they are both backstabbing bastards that I could do without!!

    Well if anyone wants to be objective feel free!! X :confused:
     
    #1 Amber1, Feb 1, 2009
    Last edited: Feb 1, 2009
  2. Amber1

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    Well,

    I figured it fits in well into relationships, discrimination and jealousy................
     
  3. Principessa

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    It fits here fine, the forum you put this in isn't a problem for me. :cool:

    What I find confuzzling is the somewhat juvenile behavior of your female friend. If I didn't know better I'd swear she wanted him for herself. It's possible he is a cad and likes you. Or maybe your friend is just jealous that he likes you and is trying to put a wedge between you two? :confused: If you want the truth you have to ask him. Do you always let your girlfriends have control over your love life? :confused:
     
  4. Amber1

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    No I don't which is why I kept asking questions!!

    I actually don't like the fact she looked on his phone it wasn't her place.....something just doesn't sit right with me.

    But my other girlfriends I am close to I KNOW I can trust they would never do anything like that to me. I've known her less time and men DO seem very important to her.

    You see this is why outside opinions are helpfull!!
     
  5. Principessa

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    Aha! With that additional info I would trust him, but not her. Well, trust him until he proves untrustworthy that is. :rolleyes:
     
  6. B_JasonDawgxxx

    B_JasonDawgxxx New Member

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    Your friend seems to have motives of her own here.
     
  7. Amber1

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    Yeah, I am wundrin if she was jealous or not???

    I really don't know??

    I know before he was texting her quite alot and then he stopped.

    No doubt because he was texting me instead.

    When I told her he said she had come onto him she became very deffensive saying to me "Believe what you like!!" and thats when she started saying he was unnattractive.

    Yet it wasn't me accusing her anyway, I don't know if it was me I think i would be trying to reassure her (I mean if the situation was reversed) and then I would have rung him up and had a bloody good go at him!!

    Well as far as I know one of our other friends texted him for her instead which is strange.

    The annoying thing is if he IS lying then he has tried to ruin her reputation somewhat and been an arsehole to me....

    On the otherhand if SHE is then she has cleverly orchestrated things and covered all her tracks by getting us to all shut him out!!

    And I can't help but wonder if she hit on him and he knocked her back and then she got mad!!??

    Its all so confusing...only thing I do know is I'm gonna watch her like a hawke for a while......Thank god I can trust my other mates!!!!!
     
  8. Principessa

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    This girl doesn't sound like a friend. I would drop her like a hot potato. :cool:
     
  9. bguy

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    First, do you have an exclusive, monogamous relationship with this guy? No, so if you have an expectation that he not talk to any other women or receive texts from other women it is unreasonable.

    Second, I agree with the other posters that your "friend" is acting shady. How old is she? Because her actions are like those of someone in high school. It's pretty clear she's attracted to him and threatened by you. I mean, if she thinks he's so "unreliable and stuff" why would she go out for a drink with him and then have him stay the night at her place. Hello...

    He knows there are two girls that both like him so he's keeping his options open. And I think that behavior might be turning you off to him just a bit.
     
  10. Amber1

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  11. sexplease

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    people lie and fuck. period. men fight and fuck. period.

    Now, that being said, go forth, have fun and play safe
     
  12. MickeyLee

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    i would just so bail on the whole situation. too much drama and back dealing without enough emotional attachment to make pursuing any relationship worth the sweat.

    there are lots of boys who don't know any of your friends. mingling outside the circle of pals is always the best policy.

    ml
     
  13. D_Hyacinth Harrytwat

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    Call her on her BS. That's childish! It's like taking a toy that a child wasn't even using - then they start crying for it and will do whatever they can to have that toy back.

    This reminds me of the movie "Mean Girls". Yeah, your new female friend is acting like a pretty selfish high-school teen.

    It's really weird that she's going so far out of her way to check his texts for you and to ask him if he likes you or not. That's way weird. I call a bluff. She's making him out to be this terrible person while she tries to sleep with him - Bull Shiet.
     
  14. tonsilwrecker

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    I think NJQT's spot on with her observations and responses.
     
  15. Incocknito

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    This sounds too much like a soap opera. Are you sure you don't live on the set of Eastenders?

    Personally, I don't like soap operas. Not when they're played out on screen and not when they play out in real life.

    The major thing for me is this thing where you fancy him and your mate fancies him too. This would not happen with me. Within my group of friends, we each have our own women and there's none of this competing going on.

    Also who's to say this guy isn't fucking your friend, his ex, and planning to fuck you too? Of course, you may be fine with that.

    Having said that, I agree with what MickeyLee said.
     
  16. Xcuze

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    Well she's definitely being very crafty. Women can behave very strange when men are involved.

    But the guy doesnt sound a great bet either. He sounds like someone u should just Fuck n Chuck. Assuming u find him attractive enough to bother.
     
  17. D_Jaustone Jawbreaker

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    At the moment you two are not dating so he can have anyone he wants to text him..just like you may have a guy friend sending you a text..as far as your friend, she is acting shady either she is upset he likes you over her or she is afraid you two may get along well and she is left out...if you are already going through headaches before dating this guy you need to look elsewhere...stress is unhealthy especially over someone you barely know
     
  18. Amber1

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    Okay Well,

    Thanksalot everyone who replied. I've talked to her today...I dropped it in the end of conversation.....

    It transpires that a couple of things happened that I didn't know about....

    They slept in the same bed when he stayed over (no brainer!!), well they have before but with nuffin happening and I've done this with fellas too. However, she says if she'd have pushed it he would have gone for it.....

    It looks like he told a lie after to cover his back cos he panicked!!
    The next morning is when she text and said "get rid of him, he's no good!!"

    The thing is I am now more inclined to believe her as he told a lie about our other friend aswell the same day, which is blatent bullshit.

    Then when he was confronted with what he bsaid about her coming onto him, he accused me of making it up!!!

    So it appears he is a liar and a cad!!!!

    I'm still not happy with her behaviour though!!!!


     
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