Feeling good

Discussion in 'Et Cetera, Et Cetera' started by MidwestGal, Apr 2, 2008.

  1. MidwestGal

    MidwestGal Member

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    I have paid back a lot of debts this past week, in no way am I close to settling my debt with my mom but it feels really good to finally be able to give her something.

    I know disability won't give me much but it will enable me to make a budget for the first time in a very long time. I've also been able to buy a few things I have wanted to replace for a while and some I desperately needed to replace (undergarments and personal care items).

    It's been a long journey for me the past couple of years. I finally feel like I have some real hope back in my life. Even if my condition improves even lets say 30% it is so much more progress than where I am at physically now.

    I don't know what my future holds but hopefully some happiness and some simplicity would love to have some security finally as well!

    Anyhow, I am feeling pretty happy and greatful at the moment. I wanted to thank those who have been so supportive of everything here. Especially, njqt she has been a rock for me and a true friend who can understand many of the things I am/have been going through on a personal level.
     
  2. B_Monster

    B_Monster New Member

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    This news will make all of us very happy. Im happy for you K.
     
  3. naughty

    Gold Member

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    Workin' up a good pot of mad!
    I am so happy for you Thatgal. I know it must be very frustrating to not be able to take care of things as you would wish. I am glad this step is encouraging for you. I am also glad you mentioned the help NJQT has been for you. I am sure that will encourage her as well.
     
  4. TurkeyWithaSunburn

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    I'm happy for ya. Just give it some more time and things will get even better I do believe :)
     
  5. MidwestGal

    MidwestGal Member

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    thank you J, there was a point last year I almost took my life. The carseat in the back of my car thankfully sobered me up very quickly. I called my doctor the next morning and got back on some anti-depressants for a few months.

    A human can really only take so much. I hope I have had my hard part in life and it has made me a better and stronger person. I know I have more dedication than I have ever had before to help others even though I always worked jobs and volunteered in care/medical positions. It lit a spark in me that hasn't been there in quite some time.
     
  6. tripod

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    You have been pretty much given a second chance with this disability thing. The pain you go through is like climbing a mountain daily... wanting out of it is nothing but normal. I normally poo poo on anti-depressants, but you have soooo much on you that a little extra help is preferred.

    I would say that you have reached a higher level of human existence through all of your pain and struggle. You are closer to enlightenment and have a much more defined and solid soul now. The best thing is what lays ahead of you in your future with your son. The seeds have been planted in your garden for a peaceful and fulfilling life. I am sooooo HAPPY for you!!!

    :banana:
     
  7. MidwestGal

    MidwestGal Member

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    thanks and your right as usual G. I'm off all the anti-depressant and most of my meds anyhow. Last month I kind of said screw it and only take the ones I absolutely need. I still can't walk to the end of my block without getting dizzy and throwing up on most good days. But I am spending a bit more time out of bed each day. Hopefully, next week is the next step in my treatment, it's worth a try and the benefits outweigh the risks. Heck, anything pretty much does at this point! If not, methotrexate is an option and also gentemyacin injections into my inner ear (were looking at that last because it will likely destroy 50 percent of my remaining hearing in that ear). My doc is well versed in trying herbal stuff he does all types of research studies. He is one of the world's leading researchers in his field and very well respected. Plus he's a really nice person to boot!

    I'll keep trying and plugging on until life decides my time is up! Haha, after 8 years I'm not giving up. I have a little boy to give a future to! Plus I want too much more to do in this lifetime.
     
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