When I was a teenager, my parents were out one day so I went exploring. I discovered a small stash of hardcore at the top of my dad’s wardrobe. There was a VHS tape which had two films on it, and there were maybe half a dozen magazines underneath. Colour Climax stuff from Europe, and an American magazine with Jeanette Littledove on the front cover. Tons of anal.
Never in my life have I spent so much effort making sure to put things EXACTLY back where they were. I have no idea if he ever found out I’d discovered his stash or not, we’ve never talked about it.
The VHS tape was never rewound to the beginning, but was wound about halfway through the first movie on the tape. One day I’ve got the house to myself, my pants are around my ankles, and my dad’s car unexpectedly comes up the driveway. So here’s me with about 45 seconds to rewind the tape back to the same spot, eject the tape, get a chair, put the tape back where it was at the top of the wardrobe, close the wardrobe door, put the chair back, and collect myself. I only just made it, but maybe not so innocently – images of Jeanette Littledove’s asshole were still seared into my brain, and I’m pretty sure I was still rock hard when the key turned in the door.
