fingering help (gay)

Discussion in 'Sex With a Large Penis' started by rugger89, Dec 15, 2010.

  1. rugger89

    rugger89 Member

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    hey so ill keep it simple guys. im trying to get into the whole bottom groove thing with my bf. tried a couple of times and cant really get past two fingers. Just cant get into it....

    Quick question, this may seem stupid, and i know it varies for everyone so im only looking for a rough guide but how far in is the prostate...Whenever i finger or get fingered i swear i can never find it. We have a running joke im missing one...no but seriously i always thought it was kinda full finger deep in then up but diagrams (yes i got that desperate) seem to indicate its actually not that far in...

    Im hoping if i can get more pleasurable feeling out of it then ill get more into it and hopefully be able to bottom (finally)

    p.s yes yes i know, only when im ready, comfortable, be safe etc etc :p
     
  2. texas69x

    texas69x New Member

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    It's kind of up and like behind your balls and your dick and about as far in as your index finger. So if you stick your middle finger in your asshole with your hand palm side up, and you wiggle the tip of your finger upwards towards your waist, you should find it. Now, if you want a guy to hit your prostrate a lot when he's fucking you, the guy has to have a big dick, like at least 8 inches, and make sure it's thick too. I don't know why it's like this, but little dicks hurt and don't hit the pleasure spot, and big dicks feel absolutely fucking wonderful. It really doesn't matter how many times you've been fucked either. A guy with a huge cock feels so fucking good when he fucks you even if you hardly ever, even almost never, get fucked. Another thing, give up on the fingers and go for the real thing, the dick. A huge fucking dick feels da bomb for me and I hate a fucking finger jabbed up there. Have fun.
     
  3. rugger89

    rugger89 Member

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    So pretty much as far in as u can go?
     
  4. texas69x

    texas69x New Member

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    yes just about
     
  5. D_Everette Hunglungfish

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    I agree with Texas. I enjoy bottoming for dicks, especially big dicks, but I don't enjoy fingering - something that size just hurts.
     
  6. lilbear

    lilbear Member

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    Try doing a google search for "prostate massage". You will find everything you ever wanted to know. Love to have my prostate massaged by someone who knows what they are doing. If the person doesn't know, it is not fun at all
     
  7. arthurdent

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    I've never been able to locate my own prostate, but I have found the prostates of many guys. With the guy laying on his back and me sitting cross-legged between his legs, I put my left middle finger into his hole. You only need to put it in as far as the second knuckle from the finger tip. Then flex the finger tip upwards towards the base of his cock and then massage with a circular motion, while wanking his cock with the other hand. When he is just about to cum, you will feel his prostate tighten up, so that it goes from being like a small onion ring to being a hard walnut. If you can feel that happen with your finger tip, you'll know exactly where to massage next time.

    Whilst I very much enjoy the larger cock, I don't think you need a long one, as the prostate is not that far up. I would say that smaller cocks tend to get harder and are better suited to finding the prostate, but a thick cock is good for stretching the sphincter, which feels good.

    My current fuck-buddy has a long thick cock, which has a very pronounced upward curve, which is great for hitting the spot when we are facing each other. A downward curving cock would be better for hitting the spot doggie-style.

    I definitely prefer a cock to a finger up there. Fingers are too boney!
     
    #7 arthurdent, Dec 15, 2010
    Last edited: Dec 15, 2010
  8. tellme2

    tellme2 Member

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    Dudes, the prostate gland is only 1 - 1.5 inches inside the rectum toward the pubic bone. If you are going deeper than that obviously you are missing it. A small dicked guy can massage my prostate while fucking me and make me cum tons.
     
  9. B_Nicodemous

    B_Nicodemous New Member

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    *sigh* Ok it seems I must separate fact from preference. Again.

    The prostate is not very far in, about two inches or so; if it were way far up inside you, and then Digital Rectal exams would be useless, wouldn’t they? Some men will be able to find it readily in themselves others not so much. Sometimes it helps to have another person to help you.

    If you are doing it yourself, lie on your back, or your side or squat, whatever is most comfortable and gives you best access to your ass.

    With your palm facing upwards, insert your index (sometimes middle is best) and crook your finger up towards your belly button. Make slow sweeps across this region. You may want also slide your finger to various depths as you do so. With luck (and persistence) you should be able to discern a small mass of tissue about the size of a walnut, and kind of spongy. Experiment by pressing down, tapping, rubbing, thrusting back over it, whatever.

    Oh, make sure the nails of your fingers (or anyone else’s that is going exploring in there) are cut short and filed smooth. You really don't want a slice from a fingernail in there. Gloves can be worn as an extra precaution.

    Now the whole you "need" and 8 inch cock to really have prostate fun? No, you really don't. What you need is a skilled lover, and you need to be able to convey what feels good to him. Period.

    Different lengths and girths produce various feelings, IMO, that all combine in unique ways. Add to this the angle, and curvature of the cock in question, and the angle of penetration, depth and speed of fucking, and you have numerous variables in play that affect how sex will feel.

    While it is true that some people can only get off with large cocks, I find that for me, past a certain girth and I just get numb. No pain, but no pleasure either. I like the diffuse pleasure of a long cock's shaft placing almost a continuous pressure as it moves in me, but unless I want to be power fucked all the damn time (which I do enjoy, but not always) to where the guys cock head is slipping back and forth over my happy gland, then I won't cum as hard as I would from a shorter dick that is grunted to do so on every thrust.

    Everybody is different. My best top for prostate stimulation was only 4 1/2 inches. He had a wicked upward curve and a high angle (like I had to pry it away from his belly) so whenever he fucked me with my legs over his shoulders, I was guaranteed to cum. He was the only one ever to make me cum hands free, through prostate stimulation alone.

    My current Guy is about 8 in left curved cock, and I love the sensations he produces, and he has teased out some incredible orgams from fucking me, but he has yet to produce the same type that the other guy did. Which isn't to say i am complaining, just pointing out the difference in it.

    But that is just me. Other people seem to require 7 and above, or 6 in girths, or both, or like the sensation of being stretched open, or having there "second sphincter" (which isn't a true sphincter at all as I talk about in this thread) opened, or the blending of these sensations.

    Some people can't stand to be penetrated period, for whatever reason. They experience pain regardless, or at best they feel nada, so what's the point.

    Oh, in regards to fingering, I really can't say I am much of a fan. I like the intense sensations I get, but usually need 2 or 3 as one feels worse. My guy can finger me with one, and I have I love it, but even then I sometimes have to ask him to stop. I tend to be more receptive to it AFTER I get fucked. Lol

    If you are trying to get used to the width of your man's cock, and have gotten to the 2 finger stage, get yourself a dildo that is about that width. Fuck, get toys in various sizes to experiment on. The jellies can be nice as they have more give, and dildos are smoother than fingers. I have a hard time with the rigidity and roughness of fingers in general.

    So experiment and see what works for you, and above all be safe and have fun!
     
  10. MII

    MII Member

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    I'm a bottom by preference, but usually a top by default.

    With that said, I HATE getting fingered. It's painful and even though some gay men do get manicures, many don't. So they still have rough jagged nails that scratch and awkwardly bend. Having something larger actually feels better because it stimulates more parts than just the prostate, and for me, the prostate is not where the most pleasure (if any comes from) it comes from the nerve endings just near my "exit". Direct stimulation of my prostate makes me feel as if I have to urinate.

    My advice: Get a prostate massager, about 20-40 bucks online and do it yourself; if you can figure out what works for you, you can better instruct your partner. Or, buy a dildo and try slowly, that way you can take all the time you need to warm up to the feelings, and better accustom your bum to a guest.

    Bottoming is much like sushi, it's an acquired taste for some
     
  11. Bbucko

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    Your first paragraph is pretty much exactly what I'd have written, as regards depth and general location of the prostate.

    The problem many bottoms have with fingering is that it's being done too aggressively; instead of tensing up your finger and jabbing it in, try easing in a relaxed finger instead. That definitely helps, especially at first.

    One of my favorite all-time FBs loved getting fucked with dicks and toys (sometimes even fists) but hated getting fingered, even with my "soft finger" approach. Instead of opening him up that way, I just lubed my dick and inserted slowly. Once in, there was never an issue.
     
  12. rugger89

    rugger89 Member

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    Thanks so much for the info guys. Ive always assumed it was it
    Further in. I'm gonna give it a go tonight. ;)
     
  13. rugger89

    rugger89 Member

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    I still can't find it but I'm just hoping I'm with all the other guys who say fingers suck and penis rocks :p
     
  14. priapus2

    priapus2 New Member

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    I have always had trouble here too with other guys, but since I got an aneros prostate massager, I have found where mine is, so that really helps with exploring the prostates of other guys! They all tell me I am the Boss too!
     
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