Originally posted by Slamdunk_dude@Sep 14 2005, 02:54 AM
Hey guys,
As some of you know from my first thread I'm an 18 yr old guy experimenting and learning about his sexuality. Problem is I have never had any kind of sexual contact with a guy, I feel like I'm ready to see what it is like but have no idea how to initiate something. Am I totally clueless? LOL I don't really feel comfortable experimenting with friends but that only leaves strangers.
What do you all think about meeting dudes on the net and hooking up? or cruising? I can't even believe I'm asking but I feel like I need to know what its like...
Sorry if I sound crazy
Slamdunk_Dude
[post=343064]Quoted post[/post]
Hooking up with a guy 101
1) Protect yourself. Learn all about STDs and how their transmitted. Familiarize yourself with your local health department. Since you are a gay male, you may want to get a Hepatitis combo shot. Plus, all the info about AIDS.
2) Learn how to wear a condom properly. Some guys bitch about condoms being too tight. But fellas you put your big cock in tighter holes, haven't you? No complaints or excuses.
3) Make sure that the guy you are getting involved with has great open energy about him. Meaning: he isn't high and/or drunk, has "issues", doesn't have anger mgmt. issues, life problems, sh-tty to be around, a downer, unable to listen and abide by your boundaries, and anything else you can think of that would be prohibitive of you having a good experience.
4) You will have to do the same things in Rule 3 for him as well.
5) Agree that at any time you want to STOP. STOP means STOP. NO means NO.
6) Read up on everything related to sex. Check out some books at the library about sex, love, and relationships. If you are a little scared about that, take you a pen and a notebook to the library. Study those books there and take notes.
7) Date teenagers in your own age group. No older men yet. When you become an older guy, you can date older. There are a lot of people out there that do prey upon guys your age. Follow this rule, you will be thankful--trust me.
8) Don't ever drink, drug, or smoke. Don't you even start and/or think about it! See Rule 3 and 4. You will thank me for this.
9) Don't ever devalue someone or bring anger into the sexual space. If you guys do you've killed any chances of having good sex.
10) Know that the characters on Queer As Folk or Oz do not represent all of gay society.
11) It is OK to change your mind.
12) Be able to talk about anything and everything that you and the interested party want to do before anything gets started. Always express what you're wanting to do and know what you aren't willing to do. If there is any disagreements, you can postpone sex and/ or find a willing partner who is agreeable.
13) If it is your first time doing anything, don't be afraid to let your partner know your inexperience.
14) Always have money for a cab, bus, or train home. Have cab numbers on hand.
15) Always have high-quality condoms and premium lube (designed for condoms) for sex on hand at all times. Better to have and not need them than to Not have and need it. Have a goody bag for them.
16) Remember that all of these rules apply to your partner as well.
17) Don't ever trivialize sex. Just when you do, you'll find you have more to learn.
18) To enjoy life, you have appreciate and respect life. Appreciate yours and respect it. Appreciate your partner's and respect it. In love, you have to make sure that both are always on the page at all times. You can marry in love today and find out tomorrow divorced and hating on each other. Sexual attraction and desire isn't love. Love has many definitions make sure that you both are on the same definitions. People evolve. Always have a breakup strategy. Talk about it before it happens. Think very deep before you leap.
19) Remember there will be mistakes made in sex. Nothing is ever perfect. Have a sense of humor. Funny is sexy sometimes.
20) Always let someone (preferably your guardian and a great close friend of the family) know where you are going and go where you say. No deviations.
21) A relationship is a learning exercise. Study and take notes.
22) Consider rejections as blessings in disguise and as stepping stones to greater people.
23) Always learn some hobbies. Enjoy your life. There's other things in life besides sex, you know.
24) No hookups on the internet! Are you crazy? You figure the reasons on that one.
25) Masturbation is great. Remember that hot guy that rubbed his big old dick in the mall rest room and he's totally straight and married. Yeah, bummer. Go home to your room and masturbate. Fantasize about him fucking you with his big dick and going home to his wife. Or whatever twisted scenario.
26) It is okay to admire the handsomeness and beauty around us all. Fantasies are so better than actual sex. All men regardless of orientation are indeed sexy to gay men. Appreciate that. Never ever think that because you are sexually attracted to that person that that person wants to have sex with you. You can't get what you want. It is better to wait get what comes to you naturally. Always ask permission. Courtesy is a virtue. It is a form of respect and admiration.
27) Please do exercise proper hygiene habits. Be clean and fresh-smelling. A little cologne goes a long way. Anti-perspirant. Dental hygiene: Brushing and flossing.
28) Be yourselves.
29) If you don't expect, then you'll never be disappointed. Be open-minded.
This is my hook up 101 guide. I have met lots of guys with this guide including ex-BF (LTR of six years). Invisibleman. :beer: :yourock:
If I have a wish for you it is that you date. Wondering if this right for you is not just had from banging a guy/gal. Certainly you have good advice with the boys above.
