Flatmate dilemma

CallmeKyle

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So, there's a girl that I live with, and at the beginning of the year, she was quite rude to me, we always fought etc. because I was acting really cocky and she didn't like it. Then, about half way through the year she warms up to me and starts being really nice. Giggling and laughing at my jokes, complimenting me and even cooking me dinner on a daily basis. While we're hanging out, I often catch her looking at me (and visa versa)... She's really very beautiful and normally wouldn't go for a guy like me. She also asks me or I offer her a massage pretty much every time we sit and watch stuff on my computer. Then she also tells me how "nice" I am, and told me that when we move into different places at the end of the year, she wants to keep cooking for and getting massages from me. I'm just worried about being involved with someone I live with, and I don't know how to even approach her. But I can't stop think ism about her... HELP!
 

EllieP

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Hardly enough information to draw anything but a very broad conclusion, for instance, what's her type? What happened in her life to cause the change of attitude? Are either of you involved with anyone else? Or were?

So first vague conclusion: you're infatuated and your judgment is clouded.
 

CallmeKyle

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Her type is kinda bad-boyish, but not much different from me. And she tells me she wants nicer guys. Both of us have recently had regular flings.
She seems to have much less friends, because of the last guy she was with and a bad break up... Apparently, I just got much nicer...
 

EllieP

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Just going out on a limb here..... You could ask her if she is interested in a romantic relationship.

Do you mean the universal sign where he makes a circle with his index finger and thumb on his left hand and inserts the index finger of his right hand while raising his eyebrows in her direction?
 

Mercurygirl

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So you're conflicted about starting this relationship while you're still roommates? Or are wonder how to even start it? The fact she's letting you put your hands on her speaks volumes. What's a few months if things go south? Hell, you'll be free come the new year. I say go for it.
 

CallmeKyle

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We live on a university campus. Our lease ends in December, we both organized different places next year. What does it mean if she's letting me put hands on her? I mean, it's really just massaging...
And, I'm wondering how to even start it
 

Mercurygirl

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We live on a university campus. Our lease ends in December, we both organized different places next year. What does it mean if she's letting me put hands on her? I mean, it's really just massaging...
And, I'm wondering how to even start it

No it is not.

There is no such thing as "just massaging" or just a massage when it come to a man and woman. She's letting you touch her in a sensual way and that says a lot. A woman doesn't let a guy touch her in that way unless she's either paying him and it's his job or she wouldn't mind touching you back.

Let me allow Vincent to explain ... Pulp Fiction - Foot Massage - YouTube
 

Reddhott

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Do you mean the universal sign where he makes a circle with his index finger and thumb on his left hand and inserts the index finger of his right hand while raising his eyebrows in her direction?

No. I mean with actual words and everything. "(Roommate's name), I really enjoy our time together. The more I get to know you, the more I like you. What would you think about going out on a date with me?"

It might be awkward. She might turn him down. But at least he would know.
 

AlteredEgo

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What's up with that? She is a woman.
Self-loathing much? Moodiness is a personality trait. It isn't created by the person's sex, but rather his or her experiences and disposition. What rock do you and the moody women in your life all live under where you've never had to deal with moody men? Have you not looked around this site even where there are piles of sulky, moody men?
 

AlteredEgo

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Yeah... my body doesn't know anything about just a massage, even when a massage is all I want. Every few seconds, as some part or other becomes more relaxed, my body asks my brain, "Is it time for sex now? How 'bout now?" I agree with Merc. Nothing ventured, nothing gained.
 

redz_rule

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“You've gotta dance like there's nobody watching,
Love like you'll never be hurt,
Sing like there's nobody listening,
And live like it's heaven on earth.”

(I need to practice what I preach)
 

AlteredEgo

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Truth be told, I am rather afraid... I can rationalize to myself and come up with all kinds of reasons not to be, but I know I can get hurt and really don't want to be...

If you apply that to every aspect of your life you'll be broke, and never have accomplished anything. Successes in anything in life, including romance, requires risk. Go put your big girl panties on and ask her to date you. Honestly, the absolute worst case scenario is she says no, and after a few awkward weeks leaves. There are many possible outcomes which are quite good, and only a few unpleasant ones. Just tell her how you feel, like redhott suggested. Don't be a wussy. :eek:P
 

Reddhott

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I can understand not wanting to get involved while you live together. So maybe have THE TALK with her when you two are getting ready to go different directions. That way if she doesnt feel the same way, at least you dont have to see her every day. Something light like "(Her name) I've really enjoyed getting to know you. I'd like to stay in touch. Would you like to go out withh me some time on a date?" Make sure it's clear that you aren't looking to hang out as buds. She may shoot you down. She might not. You won't know until you ask.