Flirting & Eye Contact

Discussion in 'Relationships, Discrimination, and Jealousy' started by ebb33, Sep 1, 2007.

  1. ebb33

    ebb33 Member

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    I'm bored, so let me ask you something:

    Flirting is so much about non-verbal action, we all know that. When you flirt, do you like intensive eye contact? Do hate when it goes for too long?

    Personally, I love eye contact. It can intensify a conversation/moment so much. I used to be pretty shy, and never look into somebody's eyes, but someday, I discovered my love for studying eyes, their color, shape, etc. and since then, I often am so fascinated by beautiful eyes, that I keep looking very directly and don't mind anymore. I can see the reaction from girls I already flirted with back some time and that I haven't seen in a long time and I swear they notice the difference. For me, it works a lot better.

    Btw, I tend to look in the eyes for about 2-5 seconds, then look somewhere else for short and then come back to the eyes, since I feel it gives a short break to someone who doesn't like too heavy eye contact. How do you feel about that? Should the contact be longer, uninterrupted or is that too inconvenient? What's your preference?

    I'm sorry, if this is boring, haha :redface:
     
  2. novice_btm

    Staff Member Moderator Gold Member

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    <--- Would love his eyes stared into by ebb. :biggrin1:

    For me, I'm actually pretty shy. I can't/don't stare too long at someone. I tend to look away a bit. It's not in an untrustworthy/dodgy/I'm hiding something way, but more as via an expression while talking way. But then, I tend to get told that I'm "expressive" when I talk. If I was listening to someone talking to me, I'd keep more eye contact, unless I felt it was too intense, and I got all shy.
     
  3. BurningVenus

    BurningVenus New Member

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    Your eyes are weapons of mass seduction. You have the kind of eyes that can strip you naked and fuck you from across a room.

    Now stop this before I carefully grab a fistful of your hair, pull your handsome face to mine and kiss that hot mouth of yours until your head spins.
     
  4. DreamofJeannie

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    I enjoying flirting and I too use quite a bit of eye contact. I find the sparkle that some people have in their eyes a real turn on, mentally and physically.
     
  5. goodwood

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    I am a very flirty guy and love it, expecially with the eyes. I have very bright, sky blue eyes. Many times I am asked if I wear colored contacts (I do not).
    When I spot a woman I want to flirt with and catch her eyes I lower my head, then look down and slowly look back up to her and then flash her a smile for a few seconds, look away and then back.
    When I told my friends what good success I had with this they laughed me out of town and said it was bull shit. So whenever someone doesn't believe me the next time we are out, I show them and they are amazed that it does work.
    I even showed my girlfriend. She saw it was working quite well on some other girl and made me stop. lol.
     
  6. Calboner

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    I definitely need to have breaks. I remember a woman I met who stared at me. Damned foolish of her, because she was easily pretty enough to get my attention without it. It let me know that she was "interested" in me, but it made me uncomfortable. It gave me the impression that she had picked me out not because she liked me or found me attractive but because she wanted a man -- some man or other -- and, finding me handy, had decided that I would do. Flirtation is play, and play is movement. If you don't sometimes look away, the other person has nothing to chase after.

    I find that it is easier to look into someone's eyes when I am doing the listening than when I am doing the talking. It may be because it is harder to think about what I want to say if I am looking into someone's eyes. This applies more broadly than just to flirtation.

    I think that a lot of what we think we see in someone's eyes does not really lie there: there is much more expression in the mouth than in the eyes. Only we see a face as a whole, not as a collection of features, so whatever impression we get from the entire face or from some part of it we tend to attribute to the eyes, since that is where the real back-and-forth occurs.
     
  7. ebb33

    ebb33 Member

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    It's so funny you say that, because I usually do that (not even very conscious) all the time, exactly the same way. As in your case, a friend of mine, didn't believe it, I "did it" to her and right the same moment she was like "OMG!", haha :wink:
     
  8. silvertriumph2

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    One of the things that I fina annoying is when I am speaking to someone they will not look me in the eyes. It is a bad habit and shows uninterest in the person or what they are saying. I would, and have not, hired anyone to work for me who could not keep eye contact.

    That said, eye flurting is a completely different thing. It can be done by both men and women and it can be really a turn-on and I personally find it charming. You can signal that you are not interested, or you can signal that you are interested with a lowering of the eyes and a little smile. I think of Princess Diana and how she was such an expert in drawing you in with that warm and sweet lowered eye look.

    That was how I met my wife, when we both played "eyesies" with each other on a couple of occasions. I finally couldn't stand it and got up the nerve to go say hello. I just wish that I had done it sooner!

    The eyes are a window into the soul, they say, and can be a powerful weapon or turn-on.
     
  9. TheRob

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    I usually don't look into someones eyes in casual conversation unless I am flirting with them
    but I do love eye contact
    eyes being the window to the soul, there is something to that
    I mean I have this good friend, well a friend...well some girl I know
    that we are friends I guess, and uh I like her a lot
    not like hot for her but just she's a good person
    (she is cute tho) and she has this look she gives me when I'm pestering/annoying her
    and I swear that look is so great
    I will pick on her JUST to get that look

    sometimes I really mess with her, like she'll threaten to beat me up
    and I'll not so subtly indicate that is a form of flirting (and by not so subtly I mean I flat out say it) and she sometimes argues but sometimes lets the comment slide
    I dunno
    I mean it is flirting right?
     
  10. Calboner

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    That is an impossible question to answer without first-hand observation, and even with first-hand observation it may be difficult or impossible to settle. As I understand the term, "flirting" signifies a form of erotically tinged play that has ambiguity built into it: acting in a way that suggests sexual attraction, but never in a decided way. So someone who has been flirting can always say, "I wasn't flirting, I was just being friendly," or "I wasn't flirting, I was just playing around."
     
  11. B_andyo

    B_andyo New Member

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    I look and stay looking until I receive a look back. This is awesome, next step is go and talk to that person.. :) what could happen?
     
  12. Qua

    Qua
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    I like playing a game with girls on the street (at parties etc, but usually on the street) by deliberately avoiding looking in their direction to draw their gaze then using peripheral vision to pick up on if or when they looked. I Then catch them checking me out (whether attractively or disdainfully) with full eye contact. It's tons of fun. And has worked on occasion. But usually it's just in good fun.
     
  13. BurningVenus

    BurningVenus New Member

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    And this is why you never lack for female companionship. :smile: But you are a sexy hottie who radiates confidence.

    If you were a troll, this would not be working so well for you. Really.:biggrin1:
     
  14. TheRob

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    well I'm pretty trollish to be honest tho I was once rated at 7 out of 10 : o )
    looks wise
     
  15. braumeister

    braumeister New Member

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    Eye contact is very important to me.

    When I'm talking with someone, or trying to talk to someone, (not necessarily flirting) if he/she doesn't look me in the eyes at least part of the conversation, I feel like the person isn't interested in talking to me. So I cut the conversation short and go elsewhere.

    When I'm dancing with a woman, I try to make eye contact with her, at least enough that I know what color eyes she has.
     
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