FOLLOW THE BOUNCING BULGE

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axolotl27: Unless I'm wearing my"cover-up clothes" as I do when I know I'm going to be around children, I get stared at wherever I go. I no longer give it a thought, unless something a little unusual happens that catches my eye,--like people circling around for another look, or someone following me for a long period. As I was coming out of a store in the plaza, a man was standing just outside the doorway, staring at my bulge, his eyes as big as saucers. It was at least another 5 min. before I realized that he was following me. When he moved himself into position for another look, I casually swung my shopping bag over in front of me to thwart him. When I went into a larger store, he followed me. When I went into a smaller one, he waited outside trying to appear inconspicuous. But I wouldn't give him another look. It was comical, but not to him I guess. But still he persisted. He was an older guy, not ancient like me,--but late middle age. I could tell by the way he moved that he wasn't an athlete, and he didn't walk with that fluid quality of someone who is in really good shape. Seeing that he was going to continue following me, I decided to have some fun. I said to myself, "Mister, I hope you're in decent shape". Now this was in a very large 2-storey plaza. I started walking fairly quickly, going from one floor to another repeatedly. Unfortunately for him, I always used the stairs,--at least 25 steps in each staircase,--and the staircases were no where near the escalators or elevators, so to avoid losing sight of me, he had to follow. He deserved "A" for effort. It wasn't until he had gone up and down those long flights of stairs at least 15 times that he finally gave up. He was leaning on a railing with his head down on his arms. I almost felt sorry for him,--almost. I was tempted to go over to him and say,"Why don't you go and camp out in the washroom? You might get lucky".
 
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wvalady1968: Oh, THAT'S funny!! Persistant cuss, wasn't he?
 
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rawkstar: Glad that you could keep a cool head about it! I would probably get on the defensive real quick if a guy was actually following me!
 

Pecker

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EMT: "There, there, fella, lie still and breathe this oxygen."

*WHEEZE*

EMT: "You're too out of shape to use these stairs for exercise, buddy."

*PANT PANT Pant* "No, you don't *pant* understand."

EMT: "Huh?"

*taking a deep breath* "It's just that I had to tell that old man something important."

EMT: *looking around*

"I was trying to catch up to find a polite way to tell him that he didn't realized he'd left his pants in the first store!."