I'm having a little trouble. I've gotten a little older and my pussy's suddenly gone creaky, dry and grey. Why does it look like a ten year old leather wallet but smell like ashes and stale beer? Also, there are a lot of things that seem to be living in there, from the microbial to moths to small nocturnal mammals.
FOR GAY GUYS ONLY-- My Pussy POLL!!!!
- Thread starter snoozan
- Start date
I'm not a gay guy but I hope you won't mind me commenting, have you considered the use of soap and water, a pussy is full of nooks and crannies and debris can tend to collect in those areas and as it decays it can cause suppuration of the pussy leading to smell and noxious discharges. It's possible the wildlife you're finding in there is attracted to the smell of rotting food, many animals are by nature scavengers. When it comes to the dryness and creakiness have you considered treating it like you would a leather wallet and rubbing half a pound of lard into it every day?
I once lost a remote control and imagine my surprise (oh how we laughed) when I found it had somehow got lost in my minge.
I once lost a remote control and imagine my surprise (oh how we laughed) when I found it had somehow got lost in my minge.
Wait, are you saying I shouldn't be storing the candies I swipe from the corner store in there? I'm on a fixed income and I'm diabetic so I always needs something sugary at my disposal. I used to use between my tits but now that they sag to my ankles, it's a lot easier to stuff the candies into my cunt, though I have noticed the cinnamon ones give off a slight burning sensation that I rather like.
I like the lard idea, but do you think I could use bacon fat instead? I like bacon.
Also I think I'd miss the moths if they were to go. I talk to them while I poo (whenever and whereever I happen to be at the time).
I like the lard idea, but do you think I could use bacon fat instead? I like bacon.
Also I think I'd miss the moths if they were to go. I talk to them while I poo (whenever and whereever I happen to be at the time).
You could use bacon fat and that also attracts every dog in the neighbourhood so that works really well if you're not getting much cock at the time. I think storing the candies in your snatch is a bad idea, vaginas are prone to yeast infections, try storing them in your bottom in future. Have you tried training the moths to wipe your bottom, it's a shame they aren't multitasking, although personally I find bats more amenable to this duty.
You've never fucked me, or even asked to - you must be a faker!!
Take your smelly, skanky lady-bits far from here and never offend me by posting here - EVER.
- Mr. Homer Phobe (but secretly he wants it)
Take your smelly, skanky lady-bits far from here and never offend me by posting here - EVER.
- Mr. Homer Phobe (but secretly he wants it)
I'll have you know my clit is 14"x11" and anyone who says it isn't is going to get hunted down by my hoard of flying monkeys and mercilessly ripped to shreads! SHREDS I TELL YOU!!!
HellsKitchenmanNYC
Expert Member
LIAR!!!!!!!!!! LIAR!!!!!!!!!!! I know for a fact that it's not even four inches and it curls in a skinny spiral. I don't care about your fucking flying monkeys and if you threaten me with flying monkeys again I will make an official complaint to Rob_E, the Queen and God.
Ed69
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[aside]
FLY, MY PRETTY ONES!! FLY! FLY!!!
Ha - Take THAT!
Rob_E, DC_DEEP and Jeff Black?
Impressive!Aww I just threw a bucket of piss all over you, all your beautiful wickedness bought to an end
Wrong kind of witch - I am German Porn Witch!! So I'm lappin' it up baby - lappin it up - literally.
Well now you've told me you're a German Porn Witch all sorts of evil yet delicious sexual depravations fill my mind - here, have a laxative and some sweet corn.
