GoneA said:
Oh that changes things, then. Now, I'm afraid he just has to be killed.
And, of course, if I help in this undertaking you have to split the profit fifty-fifty.
My heart is broken. It was bad enough when Aunt Jana and Uncle Prep were upset at losing money because my funeral was canceled. But DAD, how could you! Disappointed that you were not going to get your million dollar insurance check! But I know you all were just kidding. I know you love you darling little boy that is all grown up.
Aunt Jana, saw my urologist that i go to and he measured me. Twenty nine inches long now. Bigger than when you changed my diapers when I was a baby huh or caught me jacking off when I was 14. The girth is now the size of a two litter bottle. You should see my new pants from the tailor. They just put a third leg in the pants. I am a one of a kind. Twenty nine inch inseam for the two outer legs and twenty nine inch tool. I am going to have a shoe made for that leg so it won't look like I had a foot amputated. Am trying to see how I am going to make that third leg walk.
I digress here. Back to my story.
Besides I am not vindictive. Aunt Jana and Uncle Prep please forgive me for leting it slip to Haliburtan about your cozy deals on verterans funerals. I hope you don't lose too much money. Many veterans who passed away in the 70's and 80's who voted in the 2004 election in Ohio are to be reburied soon. It will be a cozy deal. Damn it, Halliburtan got the no bid contract again. The number of reburials is in the thousands. Again sorry that Aunt Jana and Unlce Prep lost out all because of my big mouth.
GoneA, if my deal with Haliburten falls through then you can help stage my fake death, I need the money. Sorry we will have to cut it three ways, Dad, you and me. Promise you won't telll Aunt Jana and Unlce Prep, they will want in the action too. Family - always wanting in on the action.
Gotta go. Gotta go visit all those hot young guys over in Under 21 and Hung. Uncle Prep is straight, not interested and Dad is too old for that site. Aunt Jana, want to come along for the ride? I saw you checking out those young cute guys in the gallery the other day before the coup attempt.
In the morning, I will talk to Halliburten. I will "try" to get Aunt Jana and Uncle Prep in the deal if I can. I plan on making lots of money. Dad owns the property where the veterans are benig buried. Sorry dad, everyone needs to know your cozy deals with Haliburten. It is part of the "No privacy Act of 2006" George Bush is really pushing for its' passage before the Democrats retake the Congress in 2007.
Bush is a neat guy. He is one of my favorite politicians. He is not as good as Hitler, Mao, and Stalin, but he tries hard and does quite well to be the dumb ass he really is.
Anyways, saying hi to all u guys out there. Hope u get refunds for those plane tickets and hotel reservations of the big celebration at Radio City Music Hall.
Hugs and Kisses
Freddie 54