Friend has HIV

Discussion in 'The Healthy Penis' started by B_lrgeggs, Jul 9, 2009.

  1. B_lrgeggs

    B_lrgeggs New Member

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    I ran into an old HS acquaintence who confided in me that he is gay and is HIV positive. I was devistated. I can only imagine what went through.
    He told me he was close to death 10 years ago. But he is better now and
    you would never guess that he has anything wrong with him. I have not seen him in years and while I have known him from school days we were never close. We just happen to know each other since we were in the same classes. I have not mentioned yet to him that I had gay feelings.
    I am not so quick to admit to them. My sexual experience with guys is pretty limited to mutual masterbation.....I not really into the gay social scene. But I think this might be an opportunity to confide in someone. Anyway, (and thank you to anyone who has read this long and wordy posting this far) But do you have
    any suggestions as to what I should or shouldn't say to this friend of
    mine who told me this news about him having HIV. Thanks for your help
     
    #1 B_lrgeggs, Jul 9, 2009
    Last edited: Jul 9, 2009
  2. OCMuscleJock

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    Treat them just like you would anyone else. He was honest with you ...be honest with him. Today HIV isn't a death sentence...if they see a dr and do their medications properly, many have undetectable status and live VERY long and healthy lives. If you have any questions ...just ask him.
     
  3. Smartalk

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    I am sure he would be quite touched that you are also prepared to be open and honest about your sexual feelings. It is good to have someone close, who shares the same sexual feelings as you, Someone that you can confide in, able to be open and honest without necessarily becoming involved in a sexual way. That is unless you both want that.

    He will know and understand how difficult it to come out having gone through it himself.

    I personally think it can only strengthen your friendship.

    Good luck

    Keep us posted
     
  4. matticus201

    matticus201 Member

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    lrgeggs, I'm sorry to hear about your friend. The good news is that he was honest with you about it, which says to me he's probably accepted it and is doing pretty well. That's great! I think you should confide in him. You might have reconnected with someone that could be a really close friend, affording you someone to talk to that understands what you are going through. I'm proud that you are accepting of him. Give him the chance to be accepting of you. =)
     
  5. B_LargePenis46

    B_LargePenis46 New Member

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    Sorry to hear this. Do not have sex with him if you want to stay HIV NEG. Just be his friend. Do not feel that you MUST come out to him as this is a personal decision that only you can make. Yes being POZ can still be a death sentence especially if the person does not take meds, the meds stop working, or none of the meds work at all. Also if a person is POZ and barebacks with other POZ people this also is very dangerous and insane since you can get other strains of HIV. Also the meds are not easy to take as they have horrible side effects and do major damage to your body and internal organs like Chemo does.
     
    #5 B_LargePenis46, Jul 9, 2009
    Last edited: Jul 9, 2009
  6. D_Jared Padalicki

    D_Jared Padalicki Account Disabled

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    Be honest too, but don't act like because he told you he is gay you should admit too. Don't do that. Just meet each other, have a chat and drink and talk about the early days and soon or later, you will see that he will ask if you see someone and then you can say. :smile:
    Good luck.
     
  7. ZOS23xy

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    And to read up on the stories that are on line here and elsewhere. I known a man who was HIV+ since 1985. Still going strong, still pushing the barriers, still writing and getting his plays produced.
     
  8. rbkwp

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    So sorry to hear of your buddys condition.
    A suggestion is to assure him you are happy to be a listening ear'be around and available .. if ineed you are
    --but if you are considering confiding' in him re yr own possible sexuality...then maybe you should consider refraining from such..as it could lead to complications ..for both parties
    My thoughts ..all the best whatever you decide.
    enz
     
  9. Kimahri

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    Sorry to hear about your buddy.

    I'd treat him the same as always. Spend time talking and getting reacquainted with one another and see where things go.
     
  10. D_Toren_Adopants

    D_Toren_Adopants Account Disabled

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    I don't see why you HAVE to tell him your deep feelings if you aren't comfortable with that. If you guys keep hanging out and you get to the point where you can feel comfortable telling him this then do it. :) good luck.
     
  11. B_lrgeggs

    B_lrgeggs New Member

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    Thank you for all the excellent responses I have received. I plan to be meeting up with him over dinner next week. I will be sure to keep you updated. There won't be any physical relations but I certainly hope we have a good friendship.
     
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