Friends father coming on to me

[Nate1978]

Well as planned he came round 2 nights ago. Things went well, I think. A few awkward moments but nothing we didn't work through.

I think I'm going to pursue this for 2 reasons. He's all I had on my mind yesterday and today and he's so outside of my comfort zone but I still feel really comfortable.

 

[Fire Stick]

Guys are often practical about this sort of thing. Although your friend may a bit surprised by this develoment, he probably understands the nature of sexual attraction and desire and will be ok with it. After all, how does he suffer is any of this?

 

[Takenachance]

Sorry but, If I was your friend.....I'd kick your ass.

Doesn't sound like you have too much respect for your guys' friendship. I can't imagine he would be too thrilled if he found out.

At the end of the day his Father will always be his Father - but you are potentially risking ruining a 10 year friendship.

Not cool at all in my book. Go tell Daddy to find another guy to play with. One that's not involved with his son.

 

[big_tits4big_dicks]

I think your friend would appreciate it more if he heard your dad had come on to you and you shot him down. I just can't see how any of this could end well, even if the son says it's ok. Take it from someone that knows, even giving the green light and playing by ALL the rules, there will still be misunderstandings and hurt feelings when you play with sex.

 

[Chase1600]

Well as planned he came round 2 nights ago. Things went well, I think. A few awkward moments but nothing we didn't work through.

I think I'm going to pursue this for 2 reasons. He's all I had on my mind yesterday and today and he's so outside of my comfort zone but I still feel really comfortable.

It’s a done deal now, so I don’t see any point continuing to contemplate whether it’s a good idea.

Hopefully you and the guy’s dad will be careful about how he finds out. I would not deceive him. If interests fade before he finds out, and no one else knows, and the two of you keep it to yourself, he may never have a reason to guess and I think that would be all for the good. But if the two of you continue to hook up, much less start a relationship, he’s bound to know.

Be thinking about where this is going to lead and if it leads anywhere, how you will handle yourselves with your friend and his son.

 

[hud01]

Sorry but, If I was your friend.....I'd kick your ass.

Doesn't sound like you have too much respect for your guys' friendship. I can't imagine he would be too thrilled if he found out.

At the end of the day his Father will always be his Father - but you are potentially risking ruining a 10 year friendship.

Not cool at all in my book. Go tell Daddy to find another guy to play with. One that's not involved with his son.

Sounds like you are an asshole. He is also risking a long term relationship if he doesn't follow through.

 

[earllogjam]

Your friendship with your friend has already changed just with you knowing that his dad is gay and hit on you. Depending how close a friend he really is - the secret most likely be a wedge that ruins your friendship as it cannot be a true friendship with you withholding and playing up a big lie.

You will act differently to your friend and your friend with distance himself from you as he will sense that you are ill at ease and not being honest, which he will easily sense if you are both together around his dad.

It boils down to how much you value your friendship and how much you love him as a friend. Is a quick fling with his dad is worth throwing away a 10 year friendship? Either way you will have to live and deal with the consequences which if you do have sex with the dad, both of them will most likely be out of your life in time.

 

[PhoenixInvictus]

LMFAO, I just want to say, i think you're effin crazy LMFAO!! But wow nice pics

 

[HotBulge]

If the math is true, that there is only a 16 to 20 year age difference, then the father married at an age before he really knew his sexual preference. To me, it looks as though your friend's father is using you to explore his own sexuality. His father knows that you are bi/gay, and the two of you are familiar with each other through fyour friend/his son. The father probably feels less of a chance of rejection from you than from others in a gay scene.

You should meet with teh father once in private. If/when he initiates an encounter, ask him if his son knows about his attractions towards other men. If his son is unaware, then tell the father that he should consider how his son would react before you/"we" fool around. If you and the father plan to have just one encounter, then you both must agree to leave it at that and not jeopardize the relationship with his son/your friend. If, however, you are both more interested than a casual encounter, then the father must map out a plan to be more open about his attractions with his family.

 

[hrdhatdad]

Both are adults and neither are married and both are out of their 20's. If they were a man and a woman, nobody would raise an eyebrow.

 

[Pitbull]

If they were a man and a woman, nobody would raise an eyebrow.

Disagree but the eyebrows would not get raised as high.

I think if some friend of yours started dating your mom it would seem very freaky.

Due to double standards if some woman friend of yours started dating your dad it would seem more acceptable.

Everyone is different
I would guess that some guy friend dating your dad would be extremely unsettling to some and not to others.

 

[Takenachance]

Sounds like you are an asshole. He is also risking a long term relationship if he doesn't follow through.

Not every potential relationship is always worth pursuing. Especially when you risk hurting people that you care about.

Why anyone would want a long term relationship with the parent of a friend they have been close to for 10 years is beyond me. And vice versa. Why would any rational parent strike up a "long term" relationship with the friend of one of their kids? Jesus - that's even worse than just having random sex with the person (which is still a pretty shitty thing to do in my opinion)

Go fuck yourself HUD. WTH do you know anyways?

I speak from experience on this subject....

 

[HungThickProf]

I will go ahead and say that you are a very a handsome man. Beautiful smile... but I agree with a previous poster- if I was your friend, I'd kick your ass. Seriously. Could you imagine how embarrassing this situation could be for him? If he was screwing one of your parents, how pissed would you be? Seriously- think about him having your mom or your dad bent over the dining room table, because it's no different from what you're doing.

There are certain rules when it comes to friends- don't fuck their family or their ex's without establishing how they would feel about it. It's just an understood rule, out of respect. Have you considered the issue that this could cause between your friend and his dad as well? I can't even believe his dad isn't even taking any shame in this. I'm disappointed in him as well...

Your friend is not me, so he may feel differently...But if I was your friend for 10 years, and you slept with one of my parents- there wouldn't be any angry facebook statuses, or hateful text messages, now I would put on twitter that "Dante' is on his way to jail"- because whether you're at home or at work, I'd be coming for you, and I'd fuck you up. Just sayin'... But you're hot!!! Keep that in mind

Take Care,

Dante'

 

[HungThickProf]

Both are adults and neither are married and both are out of their 20's. If they were a man and a woman, nobody would raise an eyebrow.

Question: You wouldn't happen to be married, closeted, and have the occasional fling, would you? Just curious.

 

[Takenachance]

I will go ahead and say that you are a very a handsome man. Beautiful smile... but I agree with a previous poster- if I was your friend, I'd kick your ass. Seriously. Could you imagine how embarrassing this situation could be for him? If he was screwing one of your parents, how pissed would you be? Seriously- think about him having your mom or your dad bent over the dining room table, because it's no different from what you're doing.

There are certain rules when it comes to friends- don't fuck their family or their ex's without establishing how they would feel about it. It's just an understood rule, out of respect. Have you considered the issue that this could cause between your friend and his dad, as well? I can't even believe his dad isn't even taking any shame in this. I'm disappointed in him as well...

Your friend is not me, so he may feel differently...But if I was your friend for 10 years, and you slept with one of my parents- there wouldn't be any angry facebook statuses, or hateful text messages, how I would put on twitter that "Dante' is on his way to jail"- because whether you're at home or at work, I'd be coming for you, and I'd fuck you up. Just sayin'... But you're hot!!! Keep that in mind

Take Care,

Dante'

Well said Dr D

 

[goldenf]

I'm with DrD on this.

There is a saying which goes, "what can happen, probably will happen" and sooner or later your fling with your good friend's dad will come out in the open and you'll run the risk of ruining not one but two good friendships.

I wouldn't dream of shagging my best friend's dad and if I found out one of my mates was humping my dad....I wouldn't be happy.

It's weird. You've got a lot going for you - looks, great bod etc. You don't need to nail your best mate's dad, so knowing your best mate could be really fucked off with you by you doing so? Why take the risk.

Still, after all the talk you probably won't be able to stand NOT knowing what he'll be like between the sheets and you'll go right ahead and carry on jumping his bones anyway lol

Good luck fella. I think you know already what you're gonna do.

 

[bigbulgelicker45]

Only the Op can answer his dilemma and I'm sure he's grateful for the information he's gotten.

Originally, he said the father was not his type but has had second thoughts. Maybe he has had a subconcious crush on him and now that "the father" has showed him pics of himself maybe there's something there. I'm in my late 40's and don't look for anyone younger than me (my preference).

I do agree that he's being put in the middle. Friend vs. potential bf.

If the father is interested in him and he can't get him off his mind then I'd say go for it. Even if its just for a night. Maybe the father needs to be validated for his sexuality but I do agree if there's something in the future then the two of them have to decide on how to break the news.

You can kind of think in a way what if the father (ok divorced/single/straight/bi/gay) develops a crush on his daughters best friend and they knew- it would be a cat fight. Unfortunately I can't remember who it was and he's a popular comedian on Howard Stern.

One thing that the OP did say which was accurate- he's not my type but....(again, I'd say there was something subconscious and he became infatuated which started to make him think.

I don't think its a right/wrong situation. You just have to follow your heart.

 

[dreamer20]

I've always gotten along with him fine but in the last few years it's turned quite flirty...my friend hasn't commented on it...At first I went along with it but then I started replying as neutrally as I could.
...there's something about him that just makes me want to say yes. He's not my type but I can't help but be a little attracted to him...

he came round 2 nights ago. Things went well, I think...
I think I'm going to pursue this for 2 reasons. He's all I had on my mind yesterday and today and he's so outside of my comfort zone but I still feel really comfortable.

Good luck KennethJL. I hope that the son is mature enough to accept your relationship.

I think if some friend of yours started dating your mom it would seem very freaky...

Everyone is different
I would guess that some guy friend dating your dad would be extremely unsettling to some and not to others.

Yes, everyone is different. To me it wouldn't seem freaky or a personal slight. I recognize and respect one's right to chose whomever one pleases as a lover and likewise hope a parent would also when faced with a May and December romance. To act outraged and denounce such a romance would be totally out of order, immature, dictatorial and disgusting IMO.

 

[B_dxjnorto]

Age difference is not a problem if you love someone -- but just for the sake of curiousity? You're fit and handsome 32. Father late forties. Unless you are a daddy's boy, you can do better.

 

[dreamer20]

dxjnorto
Age: 48
Gender: Male

You're fit and handsome 32. Father late forties. Unless you are a daddy's boy, you can do better.

Stop putting yourself down dear.:tongue: