Friends

[Pene_Negro_Grande]

Just had a question or two out of curiosity...First of all let me say - Recently come to realize that I definitely don't like titles when it comes to sexuality...But I guess I really live a straight lifestyle - I am sure you can get what I am saying...All my friends they I hang out w/are pretty much self-confessed straight...There are about 7 or 8 of us guys who go out every weekend to party...And all my friends are pretty good looking and multicultural - I mean we are black, latino, asian, white, and middle eastern...Here is the thing to get to the point - there are situations that arise sometimes when when supposedly we get drunk together or happen to pop a little pill that some things happen that would not be considered (straight)...Like for instance - at least 2 friends wanted me to jack them off, another actually kissed me, and one usually trys to hold my hand in the clubs when he gets really drunk - he gets a little depressed sometimes when he gets drunk and I am the only one in the group he likes to talk about it too, then one friend actually was playing w/my foot w/his while I was supposed passed out - I actually woke up during and just didn't know how to react so I laid there pretending to be asleep...Just wondering if anyone else has any situation like this...The thing is that most of these guys say they don't remember anything the next day - which sucks because I think it is kind of hot and these things could spark a great conversation bring us even closer than we are...All these guys are cool and really no sexual hangups about someone being gay (I mean some of the best clubs we have hit up have a majority gay clientel) and these guys get hit on by guys all the time - to the point that it scares some of them because some guys won't take no for an answer...Just curious what you folks think...But I definitely have come to believe that all guys are a little bit curious...

 

[hungthick]

these guys could just be experimenting but i have come across guys just like this and they just don't know how to be bisexual. there is nothing wrong with being str8 and kicking it on the down low now and then.

 

[Freddie53]

Originally posted by Pene_Negro_Grande@Jan 25 2005, 09:58 AM
Just had a question or two out of curiosity...First of all let me say - Recently come to realize that I definitely don't like titles when it comes to sexuality...But I guess I really live a straight lifestyle - I am sure you can get what I am saying...All my friends they I hang out w/are pretty much self-confessed straight...There are about 7 or 8 of us guys who go out every weekend to party...And all my friends are pretty good looking and multicultural - I mean we are black, latino, asian, white, and middle eastern...Here is the thing to get to the point - there are situations that arise sometimes when when supposedly we get drunk together or happen to pop a little pill that some things happen that would not be considered (straight)...Like for instance - at least 2 friends wanted me to jack them off, another actually kissed me, and one usually trys to hold my hand in the clubs when he gets really drunk - he gets a little depressed sometimes when he gets drunk and I am the only one in the group he likes to talk about it too, then one friend actually was playing w/my foot w/his while I was supposed passed out - I actually woke up during and just didn't know how to react so I laid there pretending to be asleep...Just wondering if anyone else has any situation like this...The thing is that most of these guys say they don't remember anything the next day - which sucks because I think it is kind of hot and these things could spark a great conversation bring us even closer than we are...All these guys are cool and really no sexual hangups about someone being gay (I mean some of the best clubs we have hit up have a majority gay clientel) and these guys get hit on by guys all the time - to the point that it scares some of them because some guys won't take no for an answer...Just curious what you folks think...But I definitely have come to believe that all guys are a little bit curious...

[post=277206]Quoted post[/post]​

Thanks for posting this. I am sometimes confused as well. I await posts on this as well. Guys please post. Especially those of you who say you are straight.

 

[Pene_Negro_Grande]

Yeah - I totally agree...I think they are just really nervous about the true intentions since most of these guys have or live w/their girlfriends and still scared of what might be said...Even though they sometime can't control themselves...

 

[viking]

Originally posted by Pene_Negro_Grande@Jan 25 2005, 09:36 AM
most of these guys have or live w/their girlfriends and still scared of what might be said.

[post=277246]Quoted post[/post]​

You said it.
I'm married and Bi- but I don't want my buddies to freak about it if I suggest that we play around. And yes, it really only comes up when we are drinking.

I asked my buddy if he wanted to jerk off together. He was a bit surprised and said no.
He did not say anything to anyone, and he said he admired my honesty.

I've never brought it up again, except jokingly, and it didn't hurt our friendship.
All you can do is be honest. If they are your friends, they will still be your friends afterwards.

You just have to present it like "Hey, I'm really horny. You ever think about messing around with a guy?"

They can say, yes or no. Or maybe I suppose.

 

[Pene_Negro_Grande]

You know it never really occurs like that - most times I am kind of blind sided by the actions - meaning we could be in a club or I am driving to a club or just casually driving on our way home - not even thinking about sex or being horny...That is why I guess I don't know how to react at the moment - being taken by surprise...That is why I wish we were able to talk about it the next day or something because my curiousity is sparked...The only one who probably would be more prone to talking about it is probably the footsy friend - he is always asking to stop by his house and it is usually late when we talk on the phone...Not that I am not curious - he is an attractive guy but his timing always sucks...It is when I am comfortable laying in bed and ready to crash or in the process of meeting someone out for a drink and he lives a 30 min drive away...

 

[surferboy]

Just as my viking brother said, all you can do is be honest and open. If you feel the advances are like, kinda strong, just be all "can ya please stop bein all strong". Good luck though.

 

[Orang621]

Hello, everyone, I've never posted before but feel compelled after reading this one...

First off, let me just say that it is entirely possible (and great fun) if you and your "straight" buddies are close enough to play around when wasted and date girls the rest of the time.

But to me, this is just another classic closet case... I mean, I am totally aware of bisexuality and its many forms. But a true bisexual is one that will fool around with members of either sex when drunk or sober... "Straight" guys who only play around with other guys when drunk are more likely closeted homosexuals who feel comfortable enough only when innebriated to show their true feelings. And then magically, they don't remember or don't talk about it the next day.

As a gay man, I have had too many experiences (mostly in college) where I really liked a guy, had great chemistry, but just couldn't get him to participate when sober. It never really bothered me before, because let's face it, its hard to come out, especially in certain parts of the country or in certain ethnicities, cultures and religions. But more recently, I had a guy I worked with make a pass at me when drunk and then deny it the next day. I basically told the guy not to contact me anymore, because it isn't cool with me as an adult to associate with people who lead double lives and can't deal with being gay (in their 20s or later). I had to come out to my conservative parents who haven't even met my boyfriend of 16 months. We all have to do it, so just get over the antiquated barriers and liberate yourself!! Gay sex is F-U-N, especially when you are open and honest!!!!!

It doesn't seem like this is your problem, and it sounds like you are all in agreement over the terms of your "friendship". But I would just keep in mind, this doesn't sound like a bunch of "straight" buddies. It seems to be more of a bunch of guys trying to sneak out of the closet when its dark and no one can see, and scurrying back in before daylight.

 

[woskxn]

What I've learned is that even guys that are straight can have a lot of homosexual tendencies. I think we guys get horny quiet easily, get drunk, and then we get loose. I think a lot of guys when they are not drunk go back to how they are because in essence they are not attracted to guys emotionally, they are not gay. But, at times where they are totally loose, they would let a guy blow them, or do certain things, because at that certain time, they are loose to the point that it doesn't matter to them. They are not thinking of what it means or anything, they just want to get off. (not thinking straight) Its one of those things where you know exactly what you are doing, but it doesn't seem to matter in that state.

 

[surferboy]

Originally posted by woskxn@Jan 25 2005, 02:52 PM
What I've learned is that even guys that are straight can have a lot of homosexual tendencies. I think we guys get horny quiet easily, get drunk, and then we get loose. I think a lot of guys when they are not drunk go back to how they are because in essence they are not attracted to guys emotionally, they are not gay. But, at times where they are totally loose, they would let a guy blow them, or do certain things, because at that certain time, they are loose to the point that it doesn't matter to them. They are not thinking of what it means or anything, they just want to get off. (not thinking straight) Its one of those things where you know exactly what you are doing, but it doesn't seem to matter in that state.

[post=277290]Quoted post[/post]​

I think the real problem is that people have the need to label themselves. I'm not heterosexual, homosexual, or even bisexual. I'm just sexual, as are all other humans.

 

[woskxn]

[/quote]
I think the real problem is that people have the need to label themselves. I'm not heterosexual, homosexual, or even bisexual. I'm just sexual, as are all other humans.

[post=277293]Quoted post[/post]​

[/quote]

Yeah, but we all have preferences. Even if lets say you say that you are totally attracted to guys, you have certain preferences in terms of what you look for in guys. (physically, personality, etc)

So, while I agree with you, I would say there is definetley things that we prefer more than others. However, we are a combination of things so thats why there should be no such thing as straight, gay, bi. Nobody is totally straight, or gay, we are all a combination of things.

 

[Pene_Negro_Grande]

Originally posted by surferboy@Jan 25 2005, 03:59 PM
I think the real problem is that people have the need to label themselves. I'm not heterosexual, homosexual, or even bisexual. I'm just sexual, as are all other humans.

[post=277293]Quoted post[/post]​

I hate labels too - but I really like you how you labeled yourself sexual - I am going to have to use that one...

 

[Pene_Negro_Grande]

Originally posted by woskxn@Jan 25 2005, 03:52 PM
What I've learned is that even guys that are straight can have a lot of homosexual tendencies. I think we guys get horny quiet easily, get drunk, and then we get loose. I think a lot of guys when they are not drunk go back to how they are because in essence they are not attracted to guys emotionally, they are not gay.

I like the point about attracted to guys emotionally - totally agree w/this point too...I definitely feel the emotional connection to my friends - and definitely more of a emotional and not sexual thing with us...And don't know about what the guy said about the closested thing either - because my boy will tell you he has made out w/a guy before just to prove to the guy he wasn't interested and that he had no phobias about gay guys...

 

[Pecker]

You guys may be right from your standpoint but, regardless of how tolerant or curious or admiring of others' relationships I may be, I label myself as 100% hetero because I wouldn't have sex with anyone other than a female.

 

[viking]

Originally posted by surferboy@Jan 25 2005, 11:59 AM


I think the real problem is that people have the need to label themselves. I'm not heterosexual, homosexual, or even bisexual. I'm just sexual, as are all other humans.

[post=277293]Quoted post[/post]​

Cheers My little compadre'

You're on the right track to becoming a real good man!

 

[ziggity]

a close friend of mine was a semi-out gay in the navy, during the first clinton term. plenty of straight guys were willing to get sucked or jerked by another guy "as long as i'm drunk first". interesting, eh?

 

[surferboy]

Originally posted by ebviking+Jan 25 2005, 06:11 PM--><div class='quotetop'>QUOTE(ebviking &#064; Jan 25 2005, 06:11 PM)</div><div class='quotemain'><!--QuoteBegin-surferboy@Jan 25 2005, 11:59 AM


I think the real problem is that people have the need to label themselves. I&#39;m not heterosexual, homosexual, or even bisexual. I&#39;m just sexual, as are all other humans.

[post=277293]Quoted post[/post]​

Cheers My little compadre&#39;

You&#39;re on the right track to becoming a real good man&#33;

[post=277342]Quoted post[/post]​

[/b][/quote]


Thank you&#33; That totally put a smile on my face.

 

[madame_zora]

Nixxy, you have a lot to smile about&#33;

I do think sexuality is defined by preferences, and 100% straight people have no interest in the same sex, sexually. I think it&#39;s silly that a person&#39;s sexual preferrences matter, we are all sexual beings. This put a smile on my face too.

 

[Orang621]

As the one who brought up the "closet", I would like to clarify.

I absolutely do not believe that we should label each other, but we can, and we do--its a reality. Many people on this site do it, and the original poster began his post by exclaiming that he and his friends consider themselves "straight".

I wish we could live in a society that didn&#39;t place significance on sexual identity, but it does. And due to this emphasis, many people are wrongly discriminated against, abandoned by their families, committing suicide, etc.

It would be wonderful if we could be all lovey-dovey-utopian-idealistic about it... and we can... but it doesn&#39;t mean that&#39;s the reality most of us live with and deal with daily....

 

[Pene_Negro_Grande]

Definitely see w/some of the stuff you said Orang621 - but like I said my friends are self admitted straight but who knows what their idea of straight is...Like I said we have never really got into an in dept conversation about it...Who knows - I finally told the footsy guy that I would hang out w/him tomorrow night at his place - maybe he will open up about his intentions...Then possibly we can follow suit w/my other friends...