Friendship

camper joe

Cherished Member
Joined
Jun 2, 2006
Posts
2,744
Media
0
Likes
457
Points
193
Location
North Carolina
Sexuality
No Response
Gender
Male
Originally Posted by meme0101

The odd (sad) thing about friends is that many times life takes you down separate paths and you lose touch.

This is true, but I have found that when by chance, you are together again time melts away quickly and if they was a true friend the friendship remains.
 

Principessa

Expert Member
Joined
Nov 22, 2006
Posts
18,660
Media
0
Likes
135
Points
193
Sexuality
100% Straight, 0% Gay
Gender
Female
Sometimes you lose touch for a good reason, sometimes not...

Sometimes words are said that even when you try to take them back and apologize they don't accept. I think thats one of the saddest types of loss.

I found out who my real friends were when I became physically disabled last year and couldn't work. :frown1: Apparently some people think vestibular disorders are contagious. :mad:

 

naughty

Sexy Member
Joined
May 21, 2004
Posts
11,232
Media
0
Likes
38
Points
258
Location
Workin' up a good pot of mad!
Sexuality
100% Straight, 0% Gay
Gender
Female
WOw,

I am so sorry, Patsy Ann . I am sure that must have been disappointing.
People do the same thing for recently widowed ,divorced and single women! LOL! :biggrin1:










Sometimes you lose touch for a good reason, sometimes not...

Sometimes words are said that even when you try to take them back and apologize they don't accept. I think thats one of the saddest types of loss.

I found out who my real friends were when I became physically disabled last year and couldn't work. :frown1: Apparently some people think vestibular disorders are contagious. :mad:
 

Principessa

Expert Member
Joined
Nov 22, 2006
Posts
18,660
Media
0
Likes
135
Points
193
Sexuality
100% Straight, 0% Gay
Gender
Female

I am so sorry, Patsy Ann . I am sure that must have been disappointing.
People do the same thing for recently widowed ,divorced and single women! LOL! :biggrin1:
I know, that has always been weird to me. Why can you have an extra man at a dinner party but not an extra woman? Widowed women actually get cut some slack, for a little while. People bring them casseroles and invite them out to do things. Nobody brings dinner over when you get a divorce. :tongue:
 

B_RedDude

Sexy Member
Joined
Jun 30, 2007
Posts
1,929
Media
0
Likes
82
Points
183
Location
California
Sexuality
99% Gay, 1% Straight
Gender
Male
and your words eloquent as well, Rubi

But when minor details sink the ship, I usually suspect there were several leaks ... maybe there never was the full 'spark' of friendship, or it had burned down quite a bit before the small things capsized the whole tugboat.
Disagreements over minor things often mask unaddressed, underlying issues ... and it may be the case that you should let the friendship go rather than getting in with a screwdriver to do repair work.
Depends entirely on the case, of course.
Friendship should usually be fairly easy, I think.
If it needs too much work, that fact alone is eloquent.
 

Ethyl

Legendary Member
Joined
Apr 5, 2006
Posts
5,194
Media
19
Likes
1,707
Points
333
Location
Philadelphia (Pennsylvania, United States)
Sexuality
99% Straight, 1% Gay
Gender
Female
Friendship should usually be fairly easy, I think.
If it needs too much work, that fact alone is eloquent.
Yes, if you're always working at it, something's not quite right. I think the beauty of friendship is that you feel free to express yourself and enjoy the reflection you see of yourself in others.
 

Ethyl

Legendary Member
Joined
Apr 5, 2006
Posts
5,194
Media
19
Likes
1,707
Points
333
Location
Philadelphia (Pennsylvania, United States)
Sexuality
99% Straight, 1% Gay
Gender
Female
Nobody brings dinner over when you get a divorce. :tongue:

My friends made dinner for me after my divorce. They also took care of my pooch when I was out of town and called me to make sure I wasn't wallowing in self-pity and haagen-dazs. Well, I take that back. They usually wanted to share my ice cream. :tongue:
 

HazelGod

Sexy Member
Joined
Dec 11, 2006
Posts
7,154
Media
1
Likes
30
Points
183
Location
The Other Side of the Pillow
Sexuality
99% Straight, 1% Gay
Gender
Male
I had a teacher who put it into perspective for me many years ago.

He believed that all relationships, platonic and otherwise, arose because the two people (A & B) were at a common point in their lives and each reinforced the other.

The problems, he said, are precipitated by the fact that all human beings througout their entire lives are works in progress, not static entities. Eventually, A becomes A' and B becomes B'. The relationships that endure are those wherein both the direction and rates of change for A & B are congruous.

Something about this simple model rang true with me when I heard it.
 

Principessa

Expert Member
Joined
Nov 22, 2006
Posts
18,660
Media
0
Likes
135
Points
193
Sexuality
100% Straight, 0% Gay
Gender
Female
I've been looking for this poem, since I first read this thread. I'm sure we have all had this sent to us at some time or another via e-mail.

Reason, Season, or Lifetime


What are you??? Are you a Reason a Season or a Lifetime?

People come into your life for a reason, a season, or a lifetime. When you figure out which one it is, you will know what to do for each person.

When someone is in your life for a REASON. . . It is usually to meet a need you have expressed. They have come to assist you through a difficulty, to provide you with guidance and support, to aid you physically, emotionally, or spiritually. They may seem like a godsend, and they are! They are there for the reason you need them to be. Then, without any wrong doing on your part, or at an inconvenient time, this person will say or do something to bring the relationship to an end. Sometimes they die. Sometimes they walk away. Sometimes they act up and force you to take a stand. What we must realize is that our need has been met, our desire fulfilled, their work is done. The prayer you sent up has been answered. And now it is time to move on.

Then people come into your life for a SEASON. Because your turn has come to share, grow, or learn. They bring you an experience of peace, or make you laugh. They may teach you something you have never done. They usually give you an unbelievable amount of joy. Believe it! It is real! But, only for a season.

LIFETIME relationships teach you lifetime lessons; things you must build upon in order to have a solid emotional foundation. Your job is to accept the lesson, love the person, and put what you have learned to use in all other relationships and areas of your life. It is said that love is blind
but friendship is clairvoyant.

THANK YOU for being a part of my life ~ Brian A. "Drew" Chalker
 

B_Think_Kink

Sexy Member
Joined
Oct 25, 2006
Posts
10,419
Media
0
Likes
47
Points
193
Gender
Female
is not something to be taken lightly. If you can toss a friend away easily then you have no idea of what friendship is supposed to be.

That is all.
I'm actually going to have to disagree. I don't take friendship lightly, but because my personality disorder does not allow me to trust people. I don't form bonds that would hold me to any person for any reason. Trust is earned in most cases, but for me trust doesn't exist beyond a basic level. That said... I think I have an idea what the ideal friendship should be like, but I don't think I'm a good representative of it.
 

B_Think_Kink

Sexy Member
Joined
Oct 25, 2006
Posts
10,419
Media
0
Likes
47
Points
193
Gender
Female
I've been looking for this poem, since I first read this thread. I'm sure we have all had this sent to us at some time or another via e-mail.

Reason, Season, or Lifetime


What are you??? Are you a Reason a Season or a Lifetime?

People come into your life for a reason, a season, or a lifetime. When you figure out which one it is, you will know what to do for each person.

When someone is in your life for a REASON. . . It is usually to meet a need you have expressed. They have come to assist you through a difficulty, to provide you with guidance and support, to aid you physically, emotionally, or spiritually. They may seem like a godsend, and they are! They are there for the reason you need them to be. Then, without any wrong doing on your part, or at an inconvenient time, this person will say or do something to bring the relationship to an end. Sometimes they die. Sometimes they walk away. Sometimes they act up and force you to take a stand. What we must realize is that our need has been met, our desire fulfilled, their work is done. The prayer you sent up has been answered. And now it is time to move on.

Then people come into your life for a SEASON. Because your turn has come to share, grow, or learn. They bring you an experience of peace, or make you laugh. They may teach you something you have never done. They usually give you an unbelievable amount of joy. Believe it! It is real! But, only for a season.

LIFETIME relationships teach you lifetime lessons; things you must build upon in order to have a solid emotional foundation. Your job is to accept the lesson, love the person, and put what you have learned to use in all other relationships and areas of your life. It is said that love is blind
but friendship is clairvoyant.


THANK YOU for being a part of my life ~ Brian A. "Drew" Chalker
Aw yes... I sent this to Andrew... :) Good memories. Thanks you made me smile. :smile: :smile: :smile:
 

AlteredEgo

Mythical Member
Joined
Jan 12, 2006
Posts
19,176
Media
37
Likes
26,249
Points
368
Location
Hello (Sud-Ouest, Burkina Faso)
Sexuality
No Response
I agree. However, if you have a disagreement, extend your hand of friendship despite your difference and get snubbed, you soon find how easily discarded one is.


Agreed. I always say friendship isn't friendship until it's tested. Time is a bitch of a proctor on occasion.
 

AlteredEgo

Mythical Member
Joined
Jan 12, 2006
Posts
19,176
Media
37
Likes
26,249
Points
368
Location
Hello (Sud-Ouest, Burkina Faso)
Sexuality
No Response
I know, that has always been weird to me. Why can you have an extra man at a dinner party but not an extra woman? Widowed women actually get cut some slack, for a little while. People bring them casseroles and invite them out to do things. Nobody brings dinner over when you get a divorce. :tongue:


It's kind of a tradition among my friends: If you get out of a lame relationship, we will bake you a cake, and throw you a party. There's even singing involved. It's lot's of fun, and hopefully an incentive. I'm known for excellent break-up cake, and so is Entenmann's. LOL Ben and Jerry are usually also invited.
 

Drifterwood

Superior Member
Joined
Jun 14, 2007
Posts
18,677
Media
0
Likes
2,811
Points
333
Location
Greece
Being friendly with each other doesn't make you friends.

A friend will think about you and your welfare when they don't have to.

A friend will perform an act of unnecessary kindness and compassion.

A friend will be there when you need someone even if you don't ask.

A friend will be honest if you can handle it.