Frustrating and questionable lpsg administration

[FleshFan69]

I've been exchanging messages with an amazing Admin/mod...my first positive experience with administration...and have a better idea of what's going on. Suffice it to say, it's members reporting more than them searching it out. So now I'm "Unsure" in the sexuality percentage shill game but frankly the whole thing has turned me off to helping others so I'll forgo the "Ask a..." threads until something changes.
Now it's just COCK! COCK! COCK! NON-STOP COCK!

 

[ronin001]

Sorry about your Temp ban, I spent a month in the ban box, a year or so ago. As someone previously posted, often a fellow member will report a posting , of another member for manyyyyyyyyyyyyyy reasons. Most importantly, you have to remember that no matter what percentages you label yourself, you are graded easily on your posting history. Many male members who call themselves straight; or do the NO percentage listed angle, as a way around posting in certain threads. Simply put if you have an entire posting history revolving around M/M hook ups, Male erotica, Experimentation fantasy, Etc >>>>>>.

Not directing this at you. Please do not take it that way.

But i would guess this would be how a member is portrayed , more than percentages.

Just as you I tried to post in the Bi, threads for a while. I list as 99% Straight, so my 1% should have gotten me in the door. Well Someone decided I was not Bi enough. I acknowledged the Mods directive and have tried to play in the sand boxes I am allowed to play in, ever since

LPSG is not perfect, it has a lot of flaws; but hey I am still here, so they must be doing something right

 

[Max_Polo]

Yea...WEEEEEEE!! Keeps you on your toes! LOL

And rolling eyes. Cheers!

 

[Max_Polo]

...I'll forgo the "Ask a..." threads until something changes.

I think many members avoid these because efforts to help are punished precociously. Fortunately, some mods will delete posts without too much fussing.

 

[FleshFan69]

Thanks for that. Yea, it's a flawed system especially when the mods aren't paid and it would a gargantuan job to not only police the percentages but then to police the members entire profile and messages and postings to profile them. Again, I wouldn't care so much except for the fact that I spend real time considering the person's issue and helping them and contributing and composing a response.
The whole percentage thing and the "putting people in a box" seems so counter-intuitive especially in these days we are living in and the rapid evolution of our sexuality and a forward-thinking sex site that's not just gratuitous porn or aims to be.
The mod gave some great (and funny/hair-raising) and sympathetic incites to the whole thing so I'm feeling less Soviet about the whole affair! LOL

Thanks again!

Sorry about your Temp ban, I spent a month in the ban box, a year or so ago. As someone previously posted, often a fellow member will report a posting , of another member for manyyyyyyyyyyyyyy reasons. Most importantly, you have to remember that no matter what percentages you label yourself, you are graded easily on your posting history. Many male members who call themselves straight; or do the NO percentage listed angle, as a way around posting in certain threads. Simply put if you have an entire posting history revolving around M/M hook ups, Male erotica, Experimentation fantasy, Etc >>>>>>.

Not directing this at you. Please do not take it that way.

But i would guess this would be how a member is portrayed , more than percentages.

Just as you I tried to post in the Bi, threads for a while. I list as 99% Straight, so my 1% should have gotten me in the door. Well Someone decided I was not Bi enough. I acknowledged the Mods directive and have tried to play in the sand boxes I am allowed to play in, ever since

LPSG is not perfect, it has a lot of flaws; but hey I am still here, so they must be doing something right

 

[FleshFan69]

I think many members avoid these because efforts to help are punished precociously. Fortunately, some mods will delete posts without too much fussing.

Exactly! BTW did you mean, "Unfortunately..."?

 

[Max_Polo]

Exactly! BTW did you mean, "Unfortunately..."?

No. I've had an experience where I answered a (medical) question written on the wrong bathroom wall for my gender or something. Another member (non-mod IIRC) let me know and I think I asked a mod to delete the post without beating me (I'm not into that) and they did. No punishment, just fixed my screw up...such as it was. May have gotten a pass for 1) trying to help, 2) knowing the actual correct answer to the question or 3) confessing...or some combination of those. Still kind of fucked up to provide expertise and have to apologize.

 

[328982]

My percentage was 80/20 [straight/gay] when I posted in the Bisexual threads. And it seems odd and inconsistent that there are people who don't fit the guidelines that remain in the thread.

If your percentage was 80/20 when you posted in Ask a Bisexual Man then you didn't break the TOS. So not sure why people are quoting the rules to you as though you didn't follow them.

 

[CUBE]

I got in trouble for posting on a straight thread. My screen is small and I flip around reading different stuff. I forgot it was a straight thread. I immediately deleted it the second after I posted. Then, of all things, I did it again like a month later. I’m huge one for following rules in general so I was embarrassed. I saw that by the book I was in the wrong but it seemed to me a poor call. It was also by someone that had a bit of an axe to grind. I guess I never thought I could ever do something so benign as to warrant it. I actually don’t think there should be a thread that’s off limits due to orientation as people define it so many ways and others just are in denial or lie. If I had just originally lied about myself, then I would have been ok to post. Irony in telling the truth I guess. I enjoyed reading this thread.

 

[FleshFan69]

No. I've had an experience where I answered a (medical) question written on the wrong bathroom wall for my gender or something. Another member (non-mod IIRC) let me know and I think I asked a mod to delete the post without beating me (I'm not into that) and they did. No punishment, just fixed my screw up...such as it was. May have gotten a pass for 1) trying to help, 2) knowing the actual correct answer to the question or 3) confessing...or some combination of those. Still kind of fucked up to provide expertise and have to apologize.

Oh, I see. Well I think it helped that you knew you had made an error and proactively contacted them to rectify. And probably no one reported you. I was told that's the only way they act on it.

 

[FleshFan69]

I got in trouble for posting on a straight thread. My screen is small and I flip around reading different stuff. I forgot it was a straight thread. I immediately deleted it the second after I posted. Then, of all things, I did it again like a month later. I’m huge one for following rules in general so I was embarrassed. I saw that by the book I was in the wrong but it seemed to me a poor call. It was also by someone that had a bit of an axe to grind. I guess I never thought I could ever do something so benign as to warrant it. I actually don’t think there should be a thread that’s off limits due to orientation as people define it so many ways and others just are in denial or lie. If I had just originally lied about myself, then I would have been ok to post. Irony in telling the truth I guess. I enjoyed reading this thread.

You were reported by that person most likely who is probably homophobic.

 

[Infernal]

I think for the most part, the admins truly do try to err on the side of caution for the good of everyone. Unfortunately there are those few users who take exception and will report someone for the slightest infraction, even if the offense was not the posters intention. It isn't something unique to LPSG. I've had a few moderator warnings over the years. I asked politely for clarification and received it with additional explanation if the feedback didn't answer my question. Sometimes the rules don't offer any flexibility, and even if my contribution to the thread was appropriate to the discussion, it simply is what it is. Some forums I avoid entirely, others I read, but no longer participate. In general, LPSG has been a fun experience for me over the years.

 

[FleshFan69]

I agree with everything you say and think additionally that the lack of compensation for the admins greatly diminishes the nuance they have the desire to afford the job. Because they initiate action solely when another member flags a post they are ironically leaving the administration up to the potentially unbalanced and vindictive members that the rules were created to protect us from.

I love LPSG too but I'll be more judicious and selective of the contribution I make (if any now) in the future. I'll leave my well-considered thoughts to the members of Reddit or those people who reach out.

I think for the most part, the admins truly do try to err on the side of caution for the good of everyone. Unfortunately there are those few users who take exception and will report someone for the slightest infraction, even if the offense was not the posters intention. It isn't something unique to LPSG. I've had a few moderator warnings over the years. I asked politely for clarification and received it with additional explanation if the feedback didn't answer my question. Sometimes the rules don't offer any flexibility, and even if my contribution to the thread was appropriate to the discussion, it simply is what it is. Some forums I avoid entirely, others I read, but no longer participate. In general, LPSG has been a fun experience for me over the years.

 

[Tight_N_Juicy]

My suggestion would be to keep all the ask's, but make it open to everyone, just like they do in women's issues.
It would be an easy way to increase discussions and debates.

Honestly, I kinda appreciate the fact that men can't answer in the ask a woman section. I don't wanna a bunch of people who can't/don't relate to my perspective giving answers on behalf of my gender.

I don't answer for the fellas. I don't speak for them. If the ask someone section was just an open forum, what would be the point of the entire section at all?

Just a few cents to add to the jar.

 

[693987]

Honestly, I kinda appreciate the fact that men can't answer in the ask a woman section. I don't wanna a bunch of people who can't/don't relate to my perspective giving answers on behalf of my gender.

I don't answer for the fellas. I don't speak for them. If the ask someone section was just an open forum, what would be the point of the entire section at all?

Just a few cents to add to the jar.

There are men on here who consistently try to speak for women as it is. At least they can't do that shit in one section of the entire site...

 

[FleshFan69]

Honestly, I kinda appreciate the fact that men can't answer in the ask a woman section. I don't wanna a bunch of people who can't/don't relate to my perspective giving answers on behalf of my gender.

I don't answer for the fellas. I don't speak for them. If the ask someone section was just an open forum, what would be the point of the entire section at all?

Just a few cents to add to the jar.

I agree with you and the points you make. That's the basic premise behind the restrictions in all of the "Ask a..." sections. After chatting with the admin they revealed to me just how troublesome and inappropriate some members can be and that they abuse and essentially ruin it for people that are sincere and truly want to offer help, support and perspective and are coming from an empathetic and non-judgmental place.

I suppose a person could, if they feel the need to offer some help and support, always send a message directly to the OP even if they're restricted from posting in the actual thread. But that becomes touchy because it's an actual unsolicited person-to-person contact. On the other hand, a person that comes from a place of compassion would hopefully and naturally frame the correspondence with deference and sensitivity in the first place.

 

[MisterB]

I agree with you and the points you make. That's the basic premise behind the restrictions in all of the "Ask a..." sections. After chatting with the admin they revealed to me just how troublesome and inappropriate some members can be and that they abuse and essentially ruin it for people that are sincere and truly want to offer help, support and perspective and are coming from an empathetic and non-judgmental place.

I suppose a person could, if they feel the need to offer some help and support, always send a message directly to the OP even if they're restricted from posting in the actual thread. But that becomes touchy because it's an actual unsolicited person-to-person contact. On the other hand, a person that comes from a place of compassion would hopefully and naturally frame the correspondence with deference and sensitivity in the first place.

I have twice now inadvertently posted in the Ask a Woman Forum. Both times I recall getting two e-mail notifications.

First e-mail was from a male mod; it basically said Hey, you posted in the wrong forum. don't do it again. Second time I got a notice from a female mod that, while pointing out my violation of the TOS, also told me she could tell by my posting that I was passionate about the subject, but, the TOS was the TOS. Even though I goofed, the second e-mail made me feel good. Because she understood my initial intentions. And she was right, the TOS is the TOS.

I get that the mods have a tough time with policing some of the crap some posters write. Especially some that is directed to women in some of the open forums. I often wonder "Would you say that to your mother? Your sister? Your wife?" Amazing sometimes what some ignorantly clueless folks will post.

Regarding your point about PMs. I have been *cold-contacted* by both men and women on this site in PM; the women were polite, and respectful. The men? Bout 1/2 were genuine for conversation; the others were to solicit a dick pix, or Hey MisterB, what are you into? What are you packin'? That kinda crap. Delete.

Imagine what the women have to deal with here if I, as a 64 year old gay man with NO PICTURES, or otherwise any other type of posting to indicate I was soliciting such PMs, get this crap. That's why so many women here have taken down their pictures. And, being totally honest, I am routinely surprised at the restraint so many of the women show here when dealing with these *aggressive* posters; much nicer that I would be. Or at time, have been. Period.

 

[FleshFan69]

I got a notice from a female mod that, while pointing out my violation of the TOS, also told me she could tell by my posting that I was passionate about the subject, but, the TOS was the TOS. Even though I goofed, the second e-mail made me feel good. Because she understood my initial intentions.

That's very nice. I wasn't afforded that courtesy nor were my queries immediately responded to.

Regarding the PMs, I've only had 100% positive experiences but I can imagine the women can and do have an altogether different experience.

 

[LaFemme]

That's very nice. I wasn't afforded that courtesy nor were my queries immediately responded to.

Regarding the PMs, I've only had 100% positive experiences but I can imagine the women can and do have an altogether different experience.

Other than friends, my PMs are almost 100% negative. Without exception, stranger PMs assume I am here to sexually pleasure them and indulge their penis viewing/evaluating needs. When I fail to do so, shock and dismay is expressed with an angry, “then why are you here?!”

*sigh*. It’s tough to actually have other functions than what’s between my legs.

 

[Englishmansabroad]

There are some issues here: the labels/ categories can be confusing ( my posts were deleated from the teams thread for example).

to be honest I think this is due more to the limits of these labels and categories than bad moderation per se. For instance, M to F trans person could arguably post in ask a man and ask a woman, -though some would argue that only genetic women should post in the later-and some people might define as gay, but have had opposite sexual experience......it's really about the limits of labels...

Interestingly, there are no "ask a lesbian" or " ask a bisexual woman" threads!.Also I think there should be a full trans issues section.