GreenEyes: that is the question. Some guy I went on a date with over a year and a half ago has sprung up in my life recently. We only met one time out of a spoof but I did enjoy the evening. We kissed and I did forget about that until he brought it up the other day. Later on that night he had called me and yes we had phone sex. A day or two later he had im'd me saying he didn't want to lead me on and yad da da. So hey such is life and I moved on. Months later I had called him cause I had found his number and we just talked. A smart man and interesting. Then months go by again and now he starts to im me. My recent dilema is on Friday he tells me he is amourous. Shit I can relate it has been a while for me too. He wants to meet but the timing isn't right for me. So we kind of agree on next weekend. Last night he im's me and we talk. For whatever reason I asked him if he got lucky this weekend for I remember how urgent he seemed to have been in conversation. He said, "yes, I got together with some woman I have been corresponding with on line". He then proceeds to tell me that he self pleasured himself thinking of me and how great he thinks we would be together. (blowing on my fingers right now and sitting up proud cause I know how good I can be ) I think and think again. Yes, he offers potential but yet he is like me commttment phobic or just too unsure on what exactly he wants. Basically the feeling I get is just a fuck buddy. When I say to him you should give it time with this woman and see where it goes, he agrees. Another sign to me that he might want to date her. I am too old to fight over a man or to play the games. You either want me or you don't. So I tell him in a diplomatic way that it isn't going to happen with us at this moment. Realize I do appreciate his honesty and because of that I can base a logical decision than allow myself to be deceived. He makes some comment that sometimes when things are meant to be they will happen and some things are worth waiting for. He even says he feels like kicking himself over this all. This confussed me even more. So what I am thinking with quesions. 1. Did he just want a fuck buddy? 2. Why did it take him this long to figure out he wanted to sleep with me? 3. If I did sleep with him who knows what this other woman may have or for that matter what he might? 4. Why do some men that a woman may fight over him with another woman? 5. I am just dumbfounded by it all and confused. Don't worry I know I made the right decision in telling him no for now but at the same time I might end up kicking myself also. To me I just do not think it is going to happen this late now. Realize on our initial hanging out I was open to explore a sexual or relationship with him. A year and a half later a lot in my life has changed and it makes me wonder how he could be so patient over it all. I suppose that most women, well this one, wants to feel that a man will die for her. That or at least give me the impression that he will. To move heaven and earth. Something like I want him to feel I am giving him. OK discuss.