Gave Up On Dating/meeting Women... Was It A Good Choice? [serious]

Breadoherd

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Hey everyone, so before I start typing I'd just like to say this isn't some SPH bullshit or big cock worship. It's how I genuinely feel like. I'm depressed, I'm heartless towards women (even if they like me), and basically completely emotionless. I feel dead inside.

So, basically, I have horrendous penis size insecurity. To the point, it's affecting my life, my well-being, and my relationships. I'm also muscular and tall and relatively handsome (according to women I've met). I've realized the more handsome they find you, the more size becomes more important. I've been told by women that were interested in me that I'm a good person and that they rarely meet men like me, but most of them liked me for me, not for my size. And I know this sounds shitty, but this makes me feel horrible. I know the importance of personality in dating. I know I should take this as a compliment, and I'm trying to. But I've been hurt, too many times to count... It was always my penis size. Sometimes it was directly, sometimes it was indirectly... And it's not even that women didn't like me, they wanted to stay with me. But I saw the disappointment in their eyes. And that's much more hurtful to me than if she told me directly something that's bothering her.
I've been dating my ex-girlfriend for 3 years, she was the love of my life. And she was a short girl with, small vagina. It was a perfect fit for my normal size penis. And it was absolutely perfect... And she could orgasm all the time just from the penetration of my penis, but I realized she was a rarity. And that's it's not easy for me to find that compatibility again...
After we broke up and I went through heartbreaks that almost made me kill myself. I've decided to try online dating on discord, specifically I joined dating servers and porn servers such as Lust.
There I met multiple women that were interested in me because of my initial looks and I decided to give it a shot.
The majority of women I've been with liked me and wanted to continue dating me but I called it off. It was always that case... When we exchanged nudes. They'd say something along the lines "It will be bigger IRL right?", "You just have big hands right?" or something along that lines. I know I maybe was just unlucky with women I've met? But truth is that is my experience. And honestly, they didn't even realize how much they hurt me with that because I've kept it in myself. I just laughed it off and said yeah sure, while inside I was crying.

You see, I'm that type of person... I want to be perfect for my partner... I really miss my ex a lot, because we were perfect for each other... But we broke up because of silly egoistical things and we never tried to get back together because of our egos. It's been 2 years now. She's engaged to some other dude now, but I can see on her face that she doesn't love him as much she loved me... I know how her face was when she was with me and when we took our picture next to our love tree. And that's hurting me as well. Sometimes I'm thinking about her and try not to cry but the memories are too hard for me to bare and then my tears just fall down my face.

I'm a broken person. I know women have different preferences for someone they want to date and someone they want to fuck... I know you will tell me size doesn't matter when u are in a relationship. But for me it does. Because I want to be sexually perfect for my partner like we're in a hookup but we're not. We're actually in a relationship. I don't want to feel like I lack something like I can be outranked by someone who is simply genetically given a bigger phallus. I don't want that feeling ok? I wouldn't care about it if I didn't care about how my partner feels, but I do. And I wanna be sure my penis is truly perfect for her.
I realize this will almost never be possible... My ex-girlfriend was just one in a million... And she was unique, didn't wear makeup, wasn't slutty, was loyal, was really kinky in sex...And she made me smile... A lot.
Sex is very important to me...I just want to enjoy it... This experience, but I'm so different than other men. I'm a box which key is lost. Demisexual dude, who's expected to be something which he's not by the woman he meets. I'm expected to be a dominant crazy dude that only wants to fuck anything that moves and has a huge penis.
And I'm over here just a normal dude, with a dream. And a normal-sized penis.
I know plenty of you will say the average is ideal for most women... The reality is, it's not... Women clearly fantasize about big, and it's better for them from a visual perspective.

I don't know how to help myself. I forgot how to give love, I even forgot how to receive love, but in the same time, I seek love. It seems in the wrong places.

Thank you for your time. Honestly I never thought I'd want to end myself because of my penis size insecurity. But I found this forum fitting for that theme.
 
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T_Lurch

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Have you considered that maybe size really isn't everything? No matter how big your penis might be, there will always be another out there who has a bigger one. And there's such a thing as too big. If you read the assorted threads on here, you'll realize that, yes, there's women who worship and lust after big, but most just don't care about it as much as guys do.

My wife fled an abusive husband who possessed nearly double the length I have between my legs (yes, she measured him at one point), but stayed with me for 17 years so far. She likes the man the penis is attached to, not the penis itself. And I'm not a great looking, rich hunk either. If someone like me can find one, surely you can too.

That's what the ladies on here are trying to tell you as well as a lot of other men on this site: that they look at the man overall, not just a disembodied dick.
 
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deleted1138933

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Hey everyone, so before I start typing I'd just like to say this isn't some SPH bullshit or big cock worship. It's how I genuinely feel like. I'm depressed, I'm heartless towards women (even if they like me), and basically completely emotionless. I feel dead inside.

So, basically, I have horrendous penis size insecurity. To the point, it's affecting my life, my well-being, and my relationships. I'm also muscular and tall and relatively handsome (according to women I've met). I've realized the more handsome they find you, the more size becomes more important. I've been told by women that were interested in me that I'm a good person and that they rarely meet men like me, but most of them liked me for me, not for my size. And I know this sounds shitty, but this makes me feel horrible. I know the importance of personality in dating. I know I should take this as a compliment, and I'm trying to. But I've been hurt, too many times to count... It was always my penis size. Sometimes it was directly, sometimes it was indirectly... And it's not even that women didn't like me, they wanted to stay with me. But I saw the disappointment in their eyes. And that's much more hurtful to me than if she told me directly something that's bothering her.
I've been dating my ex-girlfriend for 3 years, she was the love of my life. And she was a short girl with, small vagina. It was a perfect fit for my normal size penis. And it was absolutely perfect... And she could orgasm all the time just from the penetration of my penis, but I realized she was a rarity. And that's it's not easy for me to find that compatibility again...
After we broke up and I went through heartbreaks that almost made me kill myself. I've decided to try online dating on discord, specifically I joined dating servers and porn servers such as Lust.
There I met multiple women that were interested in me because of my initial looks and I decided to give it a shot.
The majority of women I've been with liked me and wanted to continue dating me but I called it off. It was always that case... When we exchanged nudes. They'd say something along the lines "It will be bigger IRL right?", "You just have big hands right?" or something along that lines. I know I maybe was just unlucky with women I've met? But truth is that is my experience. And honestly, they didn't even realize how much they hurt me with that because I've kept it in myself. I just laughed it off and said yeah sure, while inside I was crying.

You see, I'm that type of person... I want to be perfect for my partner... I really miss my ex a lot, because we were perfect for each other... But we broke up because of silly egoistical things and we never tried to get back together because of our egos. It's been 2 years now. She's engaged to some other dude now, but I can see on her face that she doesn't love him as much she loved me... I know how her face was when she was with me and when we took our picture next to our love tree. And that's hurting me as well. Sometimes I'm thinking about her and try not to cry but the memories are too hard for me to bare and then my tears just fall down my face.

I'm a broken person. I know women have different preferences for someone they want to date and someone they want to fuck... I know you will tell me size doesn't matter when u are in a relationship. But for me it does. Because I want to be sexually perfect for my partner like we're in a hookup but we're not. We're actually in a relationship. I don't want to feel like I lack something like I can be outranked by someone who is simply genetically given a bigger phallus. I don't want that feeling ok? I wouldn't care about it if I didn't care about how my partner feels, but I do. And I wanna be sure my penis is truly perfect for her.
I realize this will almost never be possible... My ex-girlfriend was just one in a million... And she was unique, didn't wear makeup, wasn't slutty, was loyal, was really kinky in sex...And she made me smile... A lot.
Sex is very important to me...I just want to enjoy it... This experience, but I'm so different than other men. I'm a box which key is lost. Demisexual dude, who's expected to be something which he's not by the woman he meets. I'm expected to be a dominant crazy dude that only wants to fuck anything that moves and has a huge penis.
And I'm over here just a normal dude, with a dream. And a normal-sized penis.
I know plenty of you will say the average is ideal for most women... The reality is, it's not... Women clearly fantasize about big, and it's better for them from a visual perspective.

I don't know how to help myself. I forgot how to give love, I even forgot how to receive love, but in the same time, I seek love. It seems in the wrong places.

Thank you for your time. Honestly I never thought I'd want to end myself because of my penis size insecurity. But I found this forum fitting for that theme.

First of all, from my personal life experience, I understand, sympathize with, and feel you. But would like to know, is this a perceived insecurity, or a real physical issue. Have you measured and actually fall short? You mention you have a normal penis, so I am assuming it is not small. What are the actual dimensions? That can makes a real difference.

I am in a similar situation, women tell me how my personality, compassion, sense of humor, outlook on life, heart, financial stability, social skills, etc etc make me such a great catch. However, the only difference is I do not date. I learned early on from women’s conversations, jokes, puns, innuendos what they really like and want from a man sexually, so I just figured why put myself in that situation.

I have also read some of your other posts, and understand what you are saying and going through. Unfortunately, from experience with others here (and the reality is anywhere) no one will give you any real solutions. They will simply dismiss the whole situation stating how nothing you say is real or valid, to move on, and any negative experience you have is in your imagination and due to your shitty personality and other short-comings other than the real issue of your penis size (assuming it actually is small.
 

Breadoherd

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First of all, from my personal life experience, I understand, sympathize with, and feel you. But would like to know, is this a perceived insecurity, or a real physical issue. Have you measured and actually fall short? You mention you have a normal penis, so I am assuming it is not small. What are the actual dimensions? That can makes a real difference.

I am in a similar situation, women tell me how my personality, compassion, sense of humor, outlook on life, heart, financial stability, social skills, etc etc make me such a great catch. However, the only difference is I do not date. I learned early on from women’s conversations, jokes, puns, innuendos what they really like and want from a man sexually, so I just figured why put myself in that situation.

I have also read some of your other posts, and understand what you are saying and going through. Unfortunately, from experience with others here (and the reality is anywhere) no one will give you any real solutions. They will simply dismiss the whole situation stating how nothing you say is real or valid, to move on, and any negative experience you have is in your imagination and due to your shitty personality and other short-comings other than the real issue of your penis size (assuming it actually is small.
I'm around 6.5 inches
 

Breadoherd

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Have you considered that maybe size really isn't everything? No matter how big your penis might be, there will always be another out there who has a bigger one. And there's such a thing as too big. If you read the assorted threads on here, you'll realize that, yes, there's women who worship and lust after big, but most just don't care about it as much as guys do.

My wife fled an abusive husband who possessed nearly double the length I have between my legs (yes, she measured him at one point), but stayed with me for 17 years so far. She likes the man the penis is attached to, not the penis itself. And I'm not a great looking, rich hunk either. If someone like me can find one, surely you can too.

That's what the ladies on here are trying to tell you as well as a lot of other men on this site: that they look at the man overall, not just a disembodied dick.
I get that.
But how would u explain then huys with huge dick literally get laid by mentioning or noticing bulge or something of that sort?
How would u explain why modern young women fantasize about big dicks even if they can't take it?
How would u explain that women literally thirst over huge penises? That woman worship huge dicks?
And for hookups they care about size the most in their partner?
 
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T_Lurch

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I get that.
But how would u explain then huys with huge dick literally get laid by mentioning or noticing bulge or something of that sort?
How would u explain why modern young women fantasize about big dicks even if they can't take it?
How would u explain that women literally thirst over huge penises? That woman worship huge dicks?
And for hookups they care about size the most in their partner?
Where you look for this information has a lot to do with it. Where are you getting this information from? Tabloid media? Youtube? Porn?

I hope it's not from porn, because porn is not reality.
 
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Motion-of-the-Ocean

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I'm around 6.5 inches

You call that small? Hate to burst your porn-centric bubble but that is considered above average in most circles. Reading your other posts in Women's Issues, it seems you have a real problem excepting the truth from women that size doesn't matter compared to the guy and instead insisting all women are lying about this and blaming them for your insecurities. I would imagine this is what a good deal of women do not find this appealing; along with the way you treat them by your own admission.
 

sodominsane

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I'm around 6.5 inches
Hmmmm really ,


I can hear the hurt in your voice from original post. Ether that or a really good fool me job

but 6.5 thats 15cm and actuall kinda large

B6083613-B8A9-4370-B796-5E2965CE2D6C.jpeg

like about bigger than 80 percent of the people

I’m a big dick fella... and I’ve been to a ton of group sex situation, nude situations , sports teams army and was a doctor

through no fault of my own , I’ve seen a good amount of dick. And 6.5 is quite big

So the idea that multiple women online dismiss you on dick....Na

a few things are happening
1. This is a ruse
2. Something else you said made them want to take a shot at you ( yeah people are cruel and they hit where it hurts)
3. They were joking
4 your measureming wrong
 

michael_3165

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I get that.
But how would u explain then huys with huge dick literally get laid by mentioning or noticing bulge or something of that sort?
How would u explain why modern young women fantasize about big dicks even if they can't take it?
How would u explain that women literally thirst over huge penises? That woman worship huge dicks?
And for hookups they care about size the most in their partner?

A few things.

Firstly guys often lie. Many of them fantasise about getting laid and noticed all the time but I rarely see it in real life. Much of it is a myth or outright white lies.
How do you KNOW that modern women fantasise about big dicks? From what I hear from many women (online and in real life) they are more interest in how its used rather than what size it is.
Again I may be missing something but women - like men - often big up their fantasies for outrageousness purposes.

The fact is, most women aren't all that shallow and will inevitably say that a guy that makes them laugh and understands them is without a doubt a winner if compared to a guy that just has a huge dick.

Whilst I can hear your pain, I also question the validity of this perception you have about women. In part I suspect this is related to porn and the other related to "girl talk" which can boil down to dick size but is by no means the key.
I would work on accepting that you are average (or slightly over average) and then you have three options 1) stay miserable 2) accept that some women like bigger dicks 3) accept that not all women are as shallow as you seem to be suggesting.

In short, not everything is about your dick. Most women couldn't care less how big it is as long as it does the job. I suspect that women being mean or pushing you away is more related to attitude and how you relate to them, rather than your penis. But I must admit, blaming something you can't really change is certainly a lot easier than facing that maybe behaviour needs to change.

That said, who am I to know?