Gay act? No! What's the difference?

HungThickProf

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So I had this discussion with a friend of mine today to get his thoughts on the matter, and he really couldn't give me an answer- it was just too hard for him.

This morning while I was making breakfast, I was thinking about all of the different people I've met on this site; them being married, single, parents, or not. What they enjoy, and what they seek in sexual partners. What I enjoy and what I seek in sexual partners. When you look through the "Relationships, Discrimination, and Jealousy" forum, you see a lot of threads devoted to homosexuality, bisexuality, and whether someone is or isn't...I'm hoping that this thread doesn't turn out to be the same way, but it just may. I'm looking forward to the opinions.

So while I was making breakfast, I thought of a debate that's been had before- "is masturbating to or with another guy a gay/bisexual act?" I know my answer on the matter, but for this, it doesn't matter. If you believe that it's not a gay/bisexual act, I have a question for you... If you needed to borrow a cup of sugar from your friendly next door neighbor- you knocked and the door just opened. You can clearly hear sounds coming from the living room. You walk into the living room, and you see him masturbating to images or with someone who is not of legal age. You of course panic, and he yells to you "it's okay- I don't touch, I just look!" Is your neighbor guilty of performing act of pedophilia? And if you believe so- how is a man masturbating with or to another man not a gay/bisexual act?

I look forward to hearing your views.
 

Bbucko

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Two guys wanking themselves but not each other would fall under the category of homoerotic, in my book, but not really gay.

There is lots of porn out there that I have no interest in procuring or viewing, including bestiality and vomit (oh, and scat, too :rolleyes:); I know it exists, I just self-censor because I find it repulsive. Sexualized imagery of children belongs to another whole realm of something I wouldn't even approach.

OTOH, more than half of my total stash of porn (hundreds of gigs) is straight, including some pretty extreme and brutal stuff. This neither makes me straight nor says much about my feelings for women in general. Except for a small bit of very vintage stuff, even the most brutal of porn implies consent and shows various degrees of happy endings for all concerned, not that it's required.
 

HungThickProf

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Two guys wanking themselves but not each other would fall under the category of homoerotic, in my book, but not really gay.

There is lots of porn out there that I have no interest in procuring or viewing, including bestiality and vomit (oh, and scat, too :rolleyes:); I know it exists, I just self-censor because I find it repulsive. Sexualized imagery of children belongs to another whole realm of something I wouldn't even approach.

OTOH, more than half of my total stash of porn (hundreds of gigs) is straight, including some pretty extreme and brutal stuff. This neither makes me straight nor says much about my feelings for women in general. Except for a small bit of very vintage stuff, even the most brutal of porn implies consent and shows various degrees of happy endings for all concerned, not that it's required.

You don't really answer my question about the neighbor... would the neighbor be guilt of committing an act of pedophilia?
 

Industrialsize

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So I had this discussion with a friend of mine today to get his thoughts on the matter, and he really couldn't give me an answer- it was just too hard for him.

This morning while I was making breakfast, I was thinking about all of the different people I've met on this site; them being married, single, parents, or not. What they enjoy, and what they seek in sexual partners. What I enjoy and what I seek in sexual partners. When you look through the "Relationships, Discrimination, and Jealousy" forum, you see a lot of threads devoted to homosexuality, bisexuality, and whether someone is or isn't...I'm hoping that this thread doesn't turn out to be the same way, but it just may. I'm looking forward to the opinions.

So while I was making breakfast, I thought of a debate that's been had before- "is masturbating to or with another guy a gay/bisexual act?" I know my answer on the matter, but for this, it doesn't matter. If you believe that it's not a gay/bisexual act, I have a question for you... If you needed to borrow a cup of sugar from your friendly next door neighbor- you knocked and the door just opened. You can clearly hear sounds coming from the living room. You walk into the living room, and you see him masturbating to images or with someone who is not of legal age. You of course panic, and he yells to you "it's okay- I don't touch, I just look!" Is your neighbor guilty of performing act of pedophilia? And if you believe so- how is a man masturbating with or to another man not a gay/bisexual act?

I look forward to hearing your views.
I believe your neighbor, in a legal sense according to current law, would be guilty of committing the "crime" of pedophilia and could be subject to prosecution. A man who wants to masturbate with another man obviously has some same sex attraction.
 

D_Jared Padalicki

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Pedophilia is a whole other viewpoint on sexual interactions than having a wank with another guy.
Most guys jerked off with friends because for guys it's more natural to explore things out with other guys. It's a kind of comparison.
But a person who has a minor over and he is nude and does sexual stuff, also when he doesn't touch the minor, it's still pedophilia, an illness. Especially how you described the moment when you "caught" him and he says immidiatly "it's okay- I don't touch, I just look!". Than that guy/man already knows he is doing illegal and sick stuff because he gives you immidiatly an excuse for his act.

So guys jerking off together by choice isn't a gay-act. It is a way of being close and honest and friends. It's a bonding moment.
 

maxcok

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Pedophilia is a whole other viewpoint on sexual interactions than having a wank with another guy.
Most guys jerked off with friends because for guys it's more natural to explore things out with other guys. It's a kind of comparison.
But a person who has a minor over and he is nude and does sexual stuff, also when he doesn't touch the minor, it's still pedophilia, an illness. Especially how you described the moment when you "caught" him and he says immidiatly "it's okay- I don't touch, I just look!". Than that guy/man already knows he is doing illegal and sick stuff because he gives you immidiatly an excuse for his act.
So it's the illegality that defines it as pedophilia and a taboo, "an illness"? You do realize that it wasn't very long ago homosexuality was considered an illness too, and is still considered taboo and and illness by many people, don't you? You seem to be walking around the question.

So guys jerking off together by choice isn't a gay-act. It is a way of being close and honest and friends. It's a bonding moment.
So it's not "homoerotic", as Bucko put it? Does this not sound like a bit of a rationalization?
What if they're not friends? It could be a bonding moment, or not. In any case, it's surely homoerotic.
 
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HiddenLacey

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I don't even want to touch the criminal act part of this question. I'll just throw in my own two cents.

People can call themselves whatever they wish and do whatever they want. Bottom line IMO is if I look at a woman on cam and get aroused watching her touch herself I would be sexually attracted to her. I would feel the same way about two guys camming with each other. I'm not going to attach a label to it, it simply is what it is.

There's a big difference between sitting around a campfire singing songs and drinking beer versus playing peek-a-boo with your privates.
 

nudeyorker

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Your neighbor is a pedophile, as this is how it is defined by the law...


A pedophile is someone who takes a sexual interest in children. Illegal pedophile activities include possessing or viewing any sexually explicit material featuring minors, improper sexual contact with minors even if the contact isn't physical or any other behavior that sexually exploits a child. Suspected pedophiles should be immediately reported to the proper authorities


In terms of jacking off with another guy I've always thought of it as an introduction course to Gay 101.
 

D_Jared Padalicki

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So it's the illegality that defines it as pedophilia and a taboo, "an illness"? You do realize that it wasn't very long ago homosexuality was considered an illness too, and is still considered taboo and and illness by many people, don't you? You seem to be walking around the question.

So it's not "homoerotic", as Bucko put it? Does this not sound like a bit of a rationalization?
What if they're not friends? It could be a bonding moment, or not. In any case, it's surely homoerotic.

In my opinion Pedophilia is an illness, a psychologic thing. It's not the illegality that defines it, although it does has a lot to do with it in today's environment, but it's the fact that pedophiles can live a normal life, have everything most people want, but always make the wrong mistake again by touching/raping innocent children. And this opinion isn't out of the blue, I've seen it happen and I really believe it's a disease.
Homosexuality and bisexuality and heterosexuality I don't see as a disease. Homosexuality or all of those other sexualities describes the feelings some people can have for each other, by choice, you choose your partner. Pedophiles choose their victims, children who don't dare to refuse or can't fight back because of the abussive power a pedophile uses, psychologic or physically or both.

And jerking off is seen as homoerotic by gays. really, look around on here and the ones who make a fuss about it are gay people.
So many straight guys who have children now, are married, have loads of gf's in the past, had jerk off buds or jerked off once with friends.
We guys can put on a porn on tele, get horny and wank off. In such circumstances you don't mind another guy in the room doing the same because it's just a wank. Nothing more, nothing less.
 

avg_joe

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Of course, anything involved with the minors is unacceptable and a pedophilia behavior, even if you don't engage in sexual act with them. Watching a minor masturbating is also a pedophilia behavior. I watch the porn on the internet, but I have to keep in mind that minors do not involve in the videos. Children are innocent, and they should act like children until they are 18.
 

Countryguy63

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In my opinion, I say "yes" he is involved in a pedo act, and "yes" guys jacking with or to another male(s) are involved in a gay act, and are themselves at the least bisexual (level not specified)

I don't understand why that is so scary for some? So guys go through a bisexual, experimentation period? So What? From reading on here, it's pretty normal. (except where I grew up :frown1:, damnit!)
 

HiddenLacey

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So it's the illegality that defines it as pedophilia and a taboo, "an illness"? You do realize that it wasn't very long ago homosexuality was considered an illness too, and is still considered taboo and and illness by many people, don't you?

Homosexuality is still considered a psych disorder by the AMA, well actually more the APA...:rolleyes:
 
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D_Relentless Original

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I just don't get why people have to label. apart from the pedo stuff, why can't people just enjoy what they are doing with whom at that time?, i love being ambisextrous when the mood takes ;)

Submissivegirl and Countryguy would be awesome for me.
 
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Countryguy63

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Homosexuality is still considered a psych disorder by the AMA, well actually more the APA...:rolleyes:

What does the American Poultry Association have to do with this? :tongue:

I just don't get why people have to label. apart from the pedo stuff, why can't people just enjoy what they are doing with whom at that time?, i love being ambidextrous when the mood takes ;)

Submissivegirl and Countryguy would be awesome for me.

Ooh Wow, that would be totally awesome for me too :biggrin1:
 

DiscoBoy

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And jerking off is seen as homoerotic by gays. really, look around on here and the ones who make a fuss about it are gay people.
I've seen several heterosexual men refer to it as a "gay" act, here and in person, many times. The sexually conflicted men performing the act and claiming to be exclusively heterosexual are naturally the ones that argue it's not necessarily a "gay"/homoerotic act. Gay men claim the opposite because, well, if you're getting off to a dude jerking off...:rolleyes:

So many straight guys who have children now, are married, have loads of gf's in the past, had jerk off buds or jerked off once with friends.
We guys can put on a porn on tele, get horny and wank off. In such circumstances you don't mind another guy in the room doing the same because it's just a wank. Nothing more, nothing less.
So many "straight" guys who have children now, are married, have had loads of gfs in the past have turned out to be gay.

Wanking in a room with other men is: a) erotic; and b) involving people of the same gender, which means it's c) homoerotic.

Homosexuality is still considered a psych disorder by the AMA, well actually more the APA...:rolleyes:
Actually, I think they changed their policy recently.