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Discussion in 'Relationships, Discrimination, and Jealousy' started by D_Petherick_Poundlouder, Dec 12, 2009.
[Initially I wrote alot, but it's simple question]
My family thinks I'm gay. I'm not. What do I do?
A simple "I'm not gay." should suffice; if not then they have issues that need to be worked out.
Start chasing women.
What if I trip?
Just out of the blue?
You're gay. Get over it.
hahah. appreciate the input
Here are some ideas --
Give up ballet lessons
Start watching football
Stop wearing pink tube tops
Start scratching a lot more. Everywhere.
Stop going to cat shows
Start going to cat houses
Stop getting manicures (sorry guys, I think manicured manhands are sissy)
Stop using correct grammar
Breathe through your mouth
Stop collecting dollhouses
Start working on cars and don't wash your hands afterwards
Don't say -- What a fabulous window treatment!
Say -- Yo, Baby. You wanna get some this? (But only say it to women)
Ok, I had to do that before someone else did. It was just too much fun. Hope I didn't offend any straight guys. Especially the hot ones.
So much for my funny answer, now for my serious one. If you're attractive and not threatening you will get hit on by gay guys. That doesn't mean they think you're gay! Some gay guys like str8 guys as we all know.
As far as your family goes, that's a little more difficult. Have you had serious girlfriends in the past? There is a line from My Best Friend's Wedding that says "And yes, like all devastingly handsome single men his age, his is gay." If you're goodlooking and over a certain age and not married or not with a serious GF, SOME people, maybe your family included, will assume you are gay.
Get up and start chasing again!
And speaking of car mechanics with dirty hands, that reminded me of this joke --
We now return to your regular programming.......
Sounds a lot like Me thinks the lady doth protest too much . Also sounds like your family is more tuned into you than you are . You could be BI but definitely not str8, Sounds like you need to prove it to yourself before proving it to your family . Hell you are young maybe you either dont KNOW yet or are in denial . Anyways you should talk to your mom about this maybe she can give you some insight
Get a rascal, or a hoveround.
That would be amusing... just walk in the door "I'm not gay" and walk out... will get the family talking
Even better, do it during Christmas dinner
Ajoi is being reasonable and is also demonstrating courage to ask the board. Ajoi is 19 years old - not even quite his own "man" yet. His family's opinion probably does matter to him psychologically, whether it should matter or not. I also suspect there is a racial component to it as well where Black (and some other ethnicities) may be somewhat more homophobic culturally.
To answer the question with hopefully a little more sensitivity:
- If it's the extended family - aunts, uncles, cousins - then you don't owe them any explanation
- If it's older siblings who are wondering, you may want to have a one-on-one private conversation one day and ask they are so concerned about your sexuality. Dont' be defensive, but you can point out to them that they seem more concerned about your sexuality than you do at the moment.
- If it's Mom/Dad, just a one line answer will do. Their question violates that boundary that adult children have with their parents anyhow...
I really wish I had some great advice for you, since most of the repsonses seem to not be taking your question seriously. Don't mean to imply those who gave short, comical replies don't care about your situation, I just think they are trying to tell you that you should'nt worry about it so much. I know, easier said than done. Just hang in there and it will become obvious when you start dating a girl or girls for an extended length of time and don't show any interest in guys that way.
In the mean time you sound like a very open-minded caring man who others feel comfortable confiding in, and that's a great reflection on your character. What others think may be a bit annoying or embarrassing for a while but as you get older you will be less concerned with what other people think and just be proud about who you are.
Laugh and enjoy the ride. Enjoy the girls, enjoy your friends, enjoy sex, enjoy guys if you want, and love whom you will. Don't worry about tripping. There is nothing criminal about a dick, in and of itself, nor about a kiss, cumming, or being naked if and when you feel like it, alone or with others.
Only you know who you are and what you want. Define yourself any way you like. Your family will love you, no matter what. If they sense this is a sensitive area and their teasing works, that will keep them going. Don't fall for the bait. Find something to tease them about. Accuse them of being gay or lesbian. How can anyone prove they're not? How can anyone prove what they think or feel?
People think I'm a lesbian all the time because I:
1: don't talk about sex to anyone
2: don't talk about boys
3: am not 100% feminine
I don't really care what people think and my sexuality is my business. What I do know is that I like sucking and fucking dicks, and I'm not into anything a woman has. As far as I'm concerned that's good enough to make me as straight as an arrow.
So don't let it get to you too much, people will think what they want to think.
Take the Zac Efron posters off Your wall & listen to Streisand in private, and You should be fine.
Any why do they think you are gay?