Gay or Straight, who forms closer friendships with females

B_Think_Kink

Sexy Member
Joined
Oct 25, 2006
Posts
10,419
Media
0
Likes
47
Points
193
Gender
Female
I was having a conversation with my group of friends last night and two of us are very into our friendships with gay men. As we were talking the subject of who forms closer bonds came up. Of course the one girl and I totally took over and stated that we knew gay men formed closer bonds with females because there was less chance of attraction between the two individuals. But it made me think..

In your opinion who forms the closer friendship bonds? Straight men and females or gay men and females?
 

Scrufuss

Experimental Member
Joined
Aug 21, 2008
Posts
538
Media
0
Likes
4
Points
103
Location
Here
Sexuality
100% Gay, 0% Straight
Gender
Male
Hands down, w/o even any doubt; Gay men and thier Faghags have the closest bonds..
 

SlickWilly

Experimental Member
Joined
Jan 13, 2006
Posts
175
Media
0
Likes
10
Points
238
Location
Valencia, CA
Sexuality
100% Gay, 0% Straight
Gender
Male
Hands down, w/o even any doubt; Gay men and thier Faghags have the closest bonds..

... a hasty generalization... it's true for some, not for all. I can't envision having a faghag that I could relate to on that level. To me, women's minds are just wired too differently to establish that kind of connection. I much prefer the company of men. Perhaps I'm just jaded... I've encountered too many women who wanted a gay man around as a "pet". That, or women who are very needy/clingy & want to tag along all the time and try to "understand" gay men via a relentless barrage of probing questions. No thanks... not for me.

Who knows... maybe I just attract the "fringes" of the feminine population.

Whatever...
 

Scrufuss

Experimental Member
Joined
Aug 21, 2008
Posts
538
Media
0
Likes
4
Points
103
Location
Here
Sexuality
100% Gay, 0% Straight
Gender
Male
Let me rephrase.. If U do have a woman that hangs with you then you will really have a connection, if there is no connection then you won't..
There will always be an exception to every rule or stereotype but for me, the females I know, lesbians or not, are my closest buds because there is no underlining sexual tension.. and no male egos clashing .. When I meet a female I tend to say 'dear' or 'hon' from the start which really makes them on edge until they find out I am gay then its all OK
But if I was straight the women would have certain 'walls' up in defense of a learned behaviour of being 'scoped' all the time. The comradery [sp?] wouldnt be so easy going and relaxed.
I do however make some of my straight male friends nervous.. And hate when I call them 'boys'. They are soo much fun to mess with...
 

D_Della Doubledees

Experimental Member
Joined
Jul 1, 2008
Posts
160
Media
0
Likes
11
Points
103
I agree that women are wired completely different. All of my closest friendships have been men. Most of them have been with straight men. I feel more comfortable with men over women because men are much easier for me to understand. There is no backstabbing, no "guessing what's wrong", or trying to understand what I said (or did) 8 weeks ago that has them so pissed off at me.

With my male friends, an apple is an apple.

Still, there is some security in knowing that a gay guy is my friend because he genuinely cares about me, and doesn't just want to get in my pants. With straight guys, I feel less safe being vulnerable around them, just for that reason.
 

killerb

Expert Member
Verified
Gold
Joined
Nov 13, 2007
Posts
2,090
Media
3
Likes
210
Points
383
Location
USA
Verification
View
Sexuality
99% Straight, 1% Gay
Gender
Male
good question, but I really can't compare the two based on personal experience...

I can only say that I would suspect that it would be more of an individual thing rather than a sexuality thing.
 

jeff black

Expert Member
Joined
Mar 2, 2006
Posts
10,432
Media
3
Likes
175
Points
193
Location
CANADA
I was having a conversation with my group of friends last night and two of us are very into our friendships with gay men. As we were talking the subject of who forms closer bonds came up. Of course the one girl and I totally took over and stated that we knew gay men formed closer bonds with females because there was less chance of attraction between the two individuals. But it made me think..

In your opinion who forms the closer friendship bonds? Straight men and females or gay men and females?

It really depends on the person. I don't think sexual orientation makes a difference. I know straight men who have had EXCELLENT, life long friendships with women without it becoming sexual. However, gay men have things in common with women... being as they both love dick.:wink:
 

jeff black

Expert Member
Joined
Mar 2, 2006
Posts
10,432
Media
3
Likes
175
Points
193
Location
CANADA
Although, I wanted to mention... you absolutely have to have a straight man who respects women as people as apposed to a fuckin' horndog who just wants to fuck every vagina he meets.

In other words, if the straight guy is mature.... then they have just as much success.
 

BigDallasDick8x6

Admired Member
Joined
Mar 22, 2006
Posts
3,881
Media
6
Likes
846
Points
333
Location
Dallas TX (North Oak Cliff)
Sexuality
99% Gay, 1% Straight
Gender
Male
A couple people have misinterpreted the OP's question, IMO. She didn't ask if gay men have better friendships with men or women.

She asked if women's friendships with men are stronger if the man is gay or straight.

If you're talking friendship -- no romance -- my experience has been straight women have stronger friendships with gay men than straight men. Straight men's brains are wired a certain way and women's brains are wired a certain way. Gay men's brains are mostly like straight men's, but with some changes in the hippocampus closer to female brains that straight men are. (Don't flame me if you don't like or are threatened by it. Look up the published papers.) So they are men that women can relate to more easily than straight men.
 

B_Think_Kink

Sexy Member
Joined
Oct 25, 2006
Posts
10,419
Media
0
Likes
47
Points
193
Gender
Female
A couple people have misinterpreted the OP's question, IMO. She didn't ask if gay men have better friendships with men or women.

She asked if women's friendships with men are stronger if the man is gay or straight.

If you're talking friendship -- no romance -- my experience has been straight women have stronger friendships with gay men than straight men. Straight men's brains are wired a certain way and women's brains are wired a certain way. Gay men's brains are mostly like straight men's, but with some changes in the hippocampus closer to female brains that straight men are. (Don't flame me if you don't like or are threatened by it. Look up the published papers.) So they are men that women can relate to more easily than straight men.
Thanks you for your awesome input! This is what I'm looking for, the reason and logic.
 

D_Lachtmadder Longhorne

Account Disabled
Joined
Apr 18, 2007
Posts
115
Media
0
Likes
1
Points
161
As a gay man I have no use for women in any capacity outside of family, harsh as that sounds, since I don't date them or mate them, there's nothing else I want from them either. I don't have a tag a long b/f/f, but I have been in the company of those who do, and in my estimation most of those women have low self esteem when relating to men and a secret crush on the gay man, they hope that one day he will see the light shining out of her vagina and jump on it. I mean what are we going to do, have our girlie moments talking about men? I think not, I don't need a woman to talk about men when we both have a different version of men that we're interested in. I am not a woman hater, I have a great family with women in it that I admire, we get along great and have a laugh but outside of family I have no interest unless it's strictly legitimate business or casual meetings, when it's acceptable to run into pleasant people and have light conversation. So in essence I have no idea who's better suited to being 'friends' with women, I do know that it's an almost equal opportunity world and we all make choices. You choose.
 

D_Della Doubledees

Experimental Member
Joined
Jul 1, 2008
Posts
160
Media
0
Likes
11
Points
103
I agree that women are wired completely different. All of my closest friendships have been men. Most of them have been with straight men. I feel more comfortable with men over women because men are much easier for me to understand. There is no backstabbing, no "guessing what's wrong", or trying to understand what I said (or did) 8 weeks ago that has them so pissed off at me.

With my male friends, an apple is an apple.

Still, there is some security in knowing that a gay guy is my friend because he genuinely cares about me, and doesn't just want to get in my pants. With straight guys, I feel less safe being vulnerable around them, just for that reason.


SO... I realized I never actually put an answer with this. LOL.

Closer bond for me... straight men
SAFER bond for me... gay men
 

B_BigKid589

1st Like
Joined
Sep 5, 2007
Posts
32
Media
0
Likes
1
Points
151
Sexuality
80% Straight, 20% Gay
Gender
Male
Interesting, because for me I'm a straight guy and my closest friends are pretty much all girls, and I like it that way. Now don't get me wrong I have a ton of great guy friends, but the ones I can connect with the best are definitely the girl friends.