Gay Relationships

[erpap]

If you don’t have an agreement and you have an idea that he is… How do you feel about your partner taking to others online. For chatting or sexting.

 

[briacon429]

If you don’t have an agreement and you have an idea that he is… How do you feel about your partner taking to others online. For chatting or sexting.

It sounds like the real question is: how do YOU feel about it?

You seem to be looking for validation, which I definitely understand. But in my experience, people have a wide range of feelings on the subject: some people are fine with it, others consider it cheating and potentially deal-breaking. At the end of the day though, it doesn’t matter what anybody else thinks. If you’re in a relationship, the only thing that matters is what the two of you think.

Based on what you wrote, it sounds like you’re uncomfortable with it, in which case you should probably have a serious talk. But again, it’s up to you, and you don’t need anyone’s validation for whatever you decide.

 

[erpap]

It sounds like the real question is: how do YOU feel about it?

You seem to be looking for validation, which I definitely understand. But in my experience, people have a wide range of feelings on the subject: some people are fine with it, others consider it cheating and potentially deal-breaking. At the end of the day though, it doesn’t matter what anybody else thinks. If you’re in a relationship, the only thing that matters is what the two of you think.

Based on what you wrote, it sounds like you’re uncomfortable with it, in which case you should probably have a serious talk. But again, it’s up to you, and you don’t need anyone’s validation for whatever you decide.

I’m not sure I even care anymore what my partner is doing online. However if he is talking about meeting others then it’s an issue! The relationship has had some issues. I use to consider it cheating. Now I’m like whatever. I am curious what other feel about it in their relationship and if they think their partner is doing it if it wasn’t something agreed upon.

 

[malepstars]

I’m not sure I even care anymore what my partner is doing online. However if he is talking about meeting others then it’s an issue! The relationship has had some issues. I use to consider it cheating. Now I’m like whatever. I am curious what other feel about it in their relationship and if they think their partner is doing it if it wasn’t something agreed upon.

I'm married and my husband and I are monogamous. As briacon429 said, it's different for every couple, and even more so in the gay community. It sounds like you and your partner probably need to have a very clear talk about what is and is not within the boundaries of your relationship. For example, while neither my husband nor I are allowed to play with others, we allow each other to watch porn when we're apart. But talking/sexting with someone else would be a line to not be crossed.

My husband has crossed the line a couple of times over the 15 years we've been together. I've made the choice in each instance to stay with him in spite of those and it has been a tough process to forgive him. It takes time to gain that trust back and it definitely makes your home feel less stable.

 

[erpap]

I'm married and my husband and I are monogamous. As briacon429 said, it's different for every couple, and even more so in the gay community. It sounds like you and your partner probably need to have a very clear talk about what is and is not within the boundaries of your relationship. For example, while neither my husband nor I are allowed to play with others, we allow each other to watch porn when we're apart. But talking/sexting with someone else would be a line to not be crossed.

My husband has crossed the line a couple of times over the 15 years we've been together. I've made the choice in each instance to stay with him in spite of those and it has been a tough process to forgive him. It takes time to gain that trust back and it definitely makes your home feel less stable.

26 years here and the relationship has had issues. He was on a hookup site and I found out. I have been no angel but never on a hookup site. He also drinks, which I think doesn’t help the problem.

 

[Infernal]

My husband and I have an open marriage. We both do things on the side with other people, but it's never emotional, and regardless of what he does or who he does it with, he sleeps next to me each night.

It's a different experience for different couples, so your mileage may vary.

 

[Justin_James]

Ideally, you guys would openly discuss it, but that often doesn't happen. Most men, gay or straight, fuck around online in one way or another. Let's just hope it's not in real life!