Gays Who Hate Gay Culture

[seemelater]

I have tried to fit into the gay culture club but it just seems to be the same old same old. I wouldn't ever say I'm proud to be gay. It's what happened and I accept it for what it is (although I do sometimes sleep with women). Things I CAN be proud of are the actual choices I've made in my life - at least the good choices. Pride should come from accomplishment ... not from luck of the draw. I guess I see the Pride Parade as more of a large gay party or Mardis Gras on poppers and not so much as a celebration of accomplishment. In the earlier decades it was centered on politics and exposure (the descent kind) to allow same sex partners to congregate and have sex without breaking the law. I'm probably going to get lambasted for saying this but I really do believe there are 2 different gay cultures ... one that strives to promote the stereotypical lisping swisher, gym-buffed, popper-sniffing, Gucci-wearing tart ... and one that strives to fit in with the masses and not base friendships and lifestyles on one faction of society - never hurts to branch out a bit.

 

[Bbucko]

I have tried to fit into the gay culture club but it just seems to be the same old same old. I wouldn't ever say I'm proud to be gay. It's what happened and I accept it for what it is (although I do sometimes sleep with women). Things I CAN be proud of are the actual choices I've made in my life - at least the good choices. Pride should come from accomplishment ... not from luck of the draw. I guess I see the Pride Parade as more of a large gay party or Mardis Gras on poppers and not so much as a celebration of accomplishment. In the earlier decades it was centered on politics and exposure (the descent kind) to allow same sex partners to congregate and have sex without breaking the law. I'm probably going to get lambasted for saying this but I really do believe there are 2 different gay cultures ... one that strives to promote the stereotypical lisping swisher, gym-buffed, popper-sniffing, Gucci-wearing tart ... and one that strives to fit in with the masses and not base friendships and lifestyles on one faction of society - never hurts to branch out a bit.

I'm sorry, darling. Was my post too long? Or did you just not process it because it conforms too closely to you stereotype to not bother responding?

There are ultimately two ways of looking at Gay Pride, with "pride" being the operative word.

Some see the opposite of "pride" as being "humility". This is certainly not the concept of pride that has fostered parades and celebrations since 1970, when Boston recognized the first anniversary of the Stonewall Riots with a political demonstration honoring the first act of homosexual demonstration of civil disobedience on a grand scale.

There was nothing "humble" about the Stonewall Riots, nor anything "humble" in marking its first anniversary. It was a purely political event, and quite in-your-face, thank you very much.

Others see the opposite of "pride" as "shame", which is how I choose to see it. No, there is no great "accomplishment" in having been born gay: it's a happenstance of genetics, as I believe.

HOWEVER: there is a HUGE accomplishment in coming out, recognizing, and ultimately celebrating one's gayness. Refusing to acknowledge "shame" as an aspect on one's self-image is hugely important, especially in the full glare of the withering faces of the majority.

Of much greater importance, in my opinion, is refusing to feel shame in celebrating one's sexuality, in what ever stripe it appears.

If there's no Pride Parade celebrating other sexual minorities, it's their fault for not having organized one, not mine for enjoying ours.

 

[Lex]

...

Others see the opposite of "pride" as "shame", which is how I choose to see it. No, there is no great "accomplishment" in having been born gay: it's a happenstance of genetics, as I believe.

HOWEVER: there is a HUGE accomplishment in coming out, recognizing, and ultimately celebrating one's gayness. Refusing to acknowledge "shame" as an aspect on one's self-image is hugely important, especially in the full glare of the withering faces of the majority.

Of much greater importance, in my opinion, is refusing to feel shame in celebrating one's sexuality, in what ever stripe it appears.

If there's no Pride Parade celebrating other sexual minorities, it's their fault for not having organized one, not mine for enjoying ours.

Quoted as this is the way I feel about being prideful. Great points.

TO the OP's question: who really fits into or feels comfortable in all aspects of any "culture"?

 

[B_becominghorse]

Quoted as this is the way I feel about being prideful. Great points.

TO the OP's question: who really fits into or feels comfortable in all aspects of any "culture"?

Read some of the post. Definitely into the lookist aspect of urban gay culture (many will not consider this a decent quality, but I don't give a shit, it's no different from preferring big cock, which is even more important to me than pretty looks), but have more straight than gay friends. As far as CULTURE goes, I am involved with what is more straight than gay, which is classical music and dance. Ballet and opera are sometimes considered more 'gay' than they really are, esp. ballet, in which I'm very involved, but it isn't nearly as much when you look at the inner workings--where rich people, men and women, are in control, and the star male dancers are actually usually straight, which is not usually known; the corps dancers may more often be gay and getting those beautiful buns fucked. Fiction I've read over the years has never been strictly 'gay fiction', I hate 'lifestyle culture', and I hated 'Queer as Folk.' If it's a gay writer or composer (like Tchaikovsky for music), it's definitely not because they are gay; I usually find that out later.

Everybody is into some sort of 'lookism' anyway. The most fashionable looks are no more attractive to those outside those areas than the less fashionable are to the superficial silly types. I'll suck off a plump guy with a fat dick before some prettified 4-incher anyday, but I still consider myself a 'lookist' because I am involved in Basket Beauty Worship and Basket Grooming. That's why my basket is so glamorous and stared at all the time, and why I get so much enormous cock in my mouth and up my ass. I am both overpimped and overwhored, and I wouldn't have it any other way. When I was in my 20s I was pretty but not as sexually confident. I still look good, but am far more interested in fucking than I am in 'cute clothes.'

 

[Satsfakshun]

I don't hate gay culture. I know why some people are the way they are in the gay community. I think when they finally get some power over their surroundings, some gays go a little power crazy. But considering the taunts, attacks and abuse, it's probably best to reserve judgement. However, I find lots of gay life dull, superficial and one dimensional.

 

[flame boy]

Although I agree with others about what gay culture actually is, on a superficial level I don't understand why there is such a dislike within the gay community.

Not too long ago homosexuality was illegal, and not long before that it was considered an illness and it was also punishable by death. We have come a long way in a short period of time and the fact that gay people can now live honest, open and good lives should be what we are embracing. We shouldn't be so critical of eachother - and by this I mean everyone, not just gay people.

I know its idealistic and slighty 'The Waltons' of me, but I say why can't we all just get along. We don't have to agree with each other but we can try and love rather than hate.

As RuPaul once said "Peace to all my brothers and sisters. Peace, Love & Hair Grease"

 

[ZOS23xy]

A lot of Gay Bar culture is all people think of, and the steamier stuff of leather bars and TV's are a close second. It's no worse to compare than straight bars and the red neck places where they dress up like cowboys...

...though the close knit social circles I was involved in were closer to "culture" than much else. But it was pretty much a large loose group of people who knew one another and spread and sampled the gossip. Straights do the same things.

 

[Alex Rose]

Being that I am a gay black man, I have issues with all three factions: Gay culture. Black culture. Male gender roles--masculinity. Having worked in a gay nightclub. Living in an African-American household and community. Being a man (I have penis, testicles, and testosterone. I shave every two days. I like my beard stubble. That's why I don't shave every day. :smile: ).
I don't like the stereotypes in all three factions, either: Gay: You have to be gym buff. Wear flattering expensive couture. Have to sniff poppers and do other recreational street drugs (street chems) . Like and or be into drag queens and drag culture. You have to like Madonna, Beyonce, and/or Britney Spears.
I used to be very gym buff. Into working out. I met A LOT of good looking men but they weren't looking at who the person I was inside but what the packaging looked like. I am not into doing street chems. I used to like Madonna (After the "Music" album--I didn't like her music. And when she left America--I REALLY felt she had an "air of superiority".). Beyonce can sing but writes songs that are "cutdowns". Britney Spears. (Whatever.)
Black: You have to be hoodie. Be into smoking and doing street chems. You have carry yourself a certain way in the hood. You have to be into gangsta rap and Beyonce. If you aren't into black things...then you are a sellout. If you have outside interests--you aren't black. Most definately, if you're gay...they will think that you are Ru Paul. What would they know about gay culture other than what they hear on Jerry Springer or in the hood?
I am not a hoodie. I don't like bling-bling. I don't wear urban clothing like FUBU, Rocawear, State Property and ECKO. I don't like and cannot relate to gangsta rap or Beyonce. I would like to wear what I want to wear. I do love 80s and 90s R+B and funk music. I was VERY MUCH a disco kid. So, I do like disco. I also like 80s European pop music.
Male: You have to "like and love women" and always be on the lookout for women. You have to love football and other gladiator sports. You have to always be in control. Always be in the HUMP. I am not into women sexually. Some women don't like or understand that. Hey, they can get over it. I am not trying to hate on women. I understand and respect more women than they think at times. I am not Superman. I am not in control of anything. I am not in the HUMP. I am not into sports.

I can understand being a human and not liking certain things that are human. I think that I will be myself. If people don't like who I am, there are others that do and will like me. So, you, beyotches out there--learn to be yourselves. Don't be so pressured into doing things you don't want to do. Hollywood does have a factor in what is "IN' these days. You don't have to realize that. YOU are the only one who can decide what is "IN" for yourself. Yeah, you MAY BE THE ONLY ONE WITH YOUR LIKES AND DESIRES. So, what. Minorities do not have the majority opinion. It is their opinion and you are entitled to yours.

Friend! I share the same sentiments.