Gender Vs Individuality

[Drifterwood]

I wonder whether in many respects we have promoted gender at the expense individuality.

I also wonder whether this leads to the generalisations that ultimately harm the individual because those they encounter treat them as the generalised gender rather than the individual.

I finally wonder whether the haven of the generalised gender ultimately restricts the individual.

 

[helgaleena]

Gender issue does not equal womens issue. :frown: Gender differences are biological as well as cultural, and a hard knot to unravel one from the other.

'Generalized gender' is presumably a stab at gender equality under the laws of a culture? If it results in more justice and less violence, I would be for it. All cultures restrict individuals anyway. Please elaborate what you mean.

 

[dolfette]

women's issues? seems more of a human issue.

but, obviously, us ladies are going to be the best at debating this topic. which is why you put it here. right? :wink:

 

[Drifterwood]

but, obviously, us ladies are going to be the best at debating this topic. which is why you put it here. right? :wink:

Probably :tongue:.

 

[Drifterwood]

Gender differences are biological as well as cultural, and a hard knot to unravel one from the other.

That is partly the point of the thread.

'Generalized gender' is presumably a stab at gender equality under the laws of a culture?

Not what I meant.

If it results in more justice and less violence, I would be for it.

Definitely.

All cultures restrict individuals anyway.

I'd enjoy reading your thoughts on this.

Please elaborate what you mean.

See above :smile:.

 

[helgaleena]

If you didn't mean that by 'generalized gender', what did you mean?

As to the unraveling biological from cultural gender stereotypes, I would rather not open that tin of crawly stuff.

Oh, and look what I found-- on the subject I presume?

http://tdjacobs.com/blog/?p=74

 

[Drifterwood]

There is only one gender specific section on this site, as far as I can see, and that is where I decided to post this thread. I would be very interested to learn from the moderator who has moved it, why they think it is better based elsewhere.

 

[helgaleena]

I for one am not surprised by the move. I'll bet it gets more responses now. Please define "generalized gender" better please? Third time I am asking.

 

[MickeyLee]

gender shmender.

i'm a gender blender :biggrin:

 

[Drifterwood]

Third time I am asking.

FS Helga - every time someone says either "Men" or "Women".

Will women like my cock? Will men like my titty witties? Blahblahblah......

 

[helgaleena]

generalizing is a slippery slope. You mean generalizing about gender? That's potentially hurtful. My ex used to do that. He'd go on about 'you women' this or that, and ignore the woman he was addressing, namely me, entirely. Especially if I didn't bear out his hypothesis, whatever it might have been.

 

[B_crackoff]

I wonder whether in many respects we have promoted gender at the expense individuality.

I also wonder whether this leads to the generalisations that ultimately harm the individual because those they encounter treat them as the generalised gender rather than the individual.

I finally wonder whether the haven of the generalised gender ultimately restricts the individual.

Vague! Lol. Personally, I don't tell anyone my age, my orientation, or my occupations IRL.

I hate people trying to box you & define you.

I always ask people, "so what do you like to do?". It's a far more interesting & genuine conversation, though of course, not discussing age/job/car/house does irritate people who have an innate need to measure themselves, especially those god awful networking oiks.

Anyone who's genuinely interested in you IRL will find out anyway, because you'll leak the information out, & they'll pass through your wider circle anyway. Sod smalltalk.

gender shmender.

i'm a gender blender :biggrin:

:biggrin1: Best avatar in the LPSG world too. I've gotta find the T shirt.

generalizing is a slippery slope. You mean generalizing about gender? That's potentially hurtful. My ex used to do that. He'd go on about 'you women' this or that, and ignore the woman he was addressing, namely me, entirely. Especially if I didn't bear out his hypothesis, whatever it might have been.

When men do that - they actually just mean you!!:wink:

When women have done that - they generally have just meant me!

 

[mephistopheles]

I think I understand what Drifterwood means.

As for me I'm not sure how ingrained my gender is with my personality or how much it really affects me, but people always see what they want. I don't advertise than I have testosterone, and I am a cross dresser.

My brother on the other hand is a manly man who wants to talk about how all woman are this and that and what not. His generalizations hurt everyone on a daily basis, so I would say that HIS generalizations have more of an effect than the generalizations of those he knows.

I don't think gender generalization can be constructive. At least I have never seen it used in such a manner.

 

[AlteredEgo]

Gender is a social construct. Gender itself is a generalization of expected behaviors and responses based on sex. Gender is not biological. If it were, we wouldn't look at a magenta blouse with ruffles and puffy sleeves and say, "That's girly!" The garment hasn't got tits with milk ducts, or a vagina, right? So the first mistake, perhaps, is not that there is too much generalization based on gender. The first mistake is gender itself.

 

[helgaleena]

When men do that - they actually just mean you!!:wink:

When women have done that - they generally have just meant me!

I have only your word for that. Why don't people say what they mean?

To AE: Much of gender is culturally based, but gender differences are also hard-wired in our biology. How the culture handles this is what differs so much.

To Mephistopheles: I would love to cross dress, but I can't disguise this ass!

 

[MickeyLee]

i stand as a prime example that gender is a construct, Ms. Helgaleena.

once i said fuck to sugar and spice, i defined my gender on my own terms.
except for sitting down to pee.
but i suspect is more out of being lazy on my part :biggrin:

 

[SR_Ethan Hunke]

Gender is one of the many concepts mankind created to help them grasp what they don't fully understand. The sad fact about this is it is quite constricting on what individuals can do. We are told to be ourselves, but unfortunately being ourselves sometimes clashs with things like gender. The end result of this being alienation and being mocked by your peers.

HOWEVER, there are people out there (myself included) who could really care less about such restrictions brought on by labels like gender. We see the whole as the sum of the parts, not just bits of it. In my opinion you are better off behaving as yourself, because it is ALOT more strenuous trying to be someone you are not.

 

[AlteredEgo]

respectfully, helgaleena, I'm going to have to ask you to look up the word gender in a dictionary. It really is a social construct that generalizes expected behavior patterns based on a person's sex. Sex is biological, gender is not. I promise. Ask your favorite dictionary.

 

[Drifterwood]

Thanks for taking up this thread.

Language is interesting. Romance (latin) based languages and Greek for that matter are very gender specific; why is a boat feminine? But then many languages, including Chinese, are not which means the majority in the world, speak gender neutral or largely gender neutral languages. Maybe it is the Indo European languages that are gender specific and all the others not to a greater extent. Not my area of expertise.

But the point is that language and therefore culture in part influence us greatly. I used to find the attempt to make our language more gender neutral a bit annoyingly PC, but I have changed my mind. And whilst I do think that most of us are guilty of using our gender a a backstop when it suits us, I do believe that we would be generally happier with less gender generalisation.

What is going to confuse me on my holiday now is the nature of my sexual attractions. Actually it isn't. I know I like people, I find people attractive, but unless I meet them I would never know if there is that sexual spark. You might fantasize though.