Good afternoon all, I wrote in here about a year talking about some discrimination that I experienced at a social gathering that bothered me and it was met a rather warm and welcoming response for my first post. I greatly appreciate it. Since then I’ve been fairly content to be a lurker but something has come up in my relationship that has become a pressing matter. May get graphic but that’s the nature of things here I suppose. I’ve been with my currently girlfriend for about 10 months or so and I couldn’t be happier. The sex has been great and for the most part discomfort free as I am the largest guy (I know there’s the “they always say that” line) she’s been with [8 ¾, on the thicker side]. I don’t claim to be amazing at using it but I do the best that I can and things have been good. The problem was always when there is a lull between us having sex e.g. after her period or if one of us had to go away for work for a few days, when raring to go I would be a little thicker/more swollen than usual and it would be a bit of a struggle to get her comfortable and not feeling discomfort. Currently she is a size 6 and gained a little weight though not a lot. Her usual work pants started to become a little tighter and them+thong would rub her the wrong way some during the day if you know what I mean. It isn’t debilitating or anything for her as far as day to day functions but on some days it makes her lips/opening extremely tender to the touch and when I’m extremely aroused it is almost too much for her to handle. We found one position, for when this occurs, that eases things in at the right angle to avoid pain but its difficult to get exactly right all of the time. I’m patient and she always feels wonderful using her hands, mouth, or pussy so I’m not worried. She has a doctor’s appointment coming up in a few weeks to have things checked out. In the meantime though whenever it gets too painful for her she gets really hurt and frustrated and starts worrying if she’s keeping my satisfied. I assume it’s pretty close to the insecurity men who have ED might face as well. What can I do to help from a physical or mental standpoint? I want to be the best person for her that I can and simply reassuring her that she’s the only one for me isn’t always enough. She’s a sweetheart and cares so much about not letting me down.