Get A Bidet!

evilluvsme

Legendary Member
Verified
Gold
Joined
Feb 3, 2010
Posts
125
Media
100
Likes
2,277
Points
523
Location
South Surrey, British Columbia, Canada
Verification
View
Sexuality
99% Straight, 1% Gay
Gender
Male
You would think that this Covid virus turns everyone into a non stop shitting machine considering there is no toilet paper available anywhere thanks to all the idiots buying it all up.

Due to that fact, I went out and found myself a PureSpa bidet for the toilet that bolts under the toilet seat. They have a cold water version or a temp controlled model for an extra $30 or so. All they had in stock was the cold water version so I grabbed it, a little worried about spraying cold water at my asshole but at least I wouldn’t have to worry about toilet paper anymore considering I can’t find any. I bought a couple packs of terry cloths and use them to dry off and then they can be washed. It took a few times to get the technique right but now I got the hang of it. I love it! The clean feeling can’t be beat and there is the bonus of how it feels while using it. First off don’t worry about the warm water version, the cold water ain’t that bad. The feeling of the water at your ass is really nice, sometimes really really nice and it gives me a hard on. I’m ok with that. It feels like a magical tongue licking your hole clean. I can even feel the water going up into my ass a bit too which adds to the overall clean feeling. Toilet paper ain’t really cleaning inside your ass much is it?

I totally recommend a bidet. Now I’m gonna have to look for hotels and resorts with bidets for when I get to travel again. Toilet paper is now a last resort for me.
 

MickeyLee

Mythical Member
Staff
Moderator
Gold
Platinum Gold
Joined
Nov 3, 2008
Posts
33,707
Media
7
Likes
49,844
Points
618
Location
neverhood
Sexuality
90% Gay, 10% Straight
"Winter is coming"

If ya live above a certain latitude come winter people are gonna wish they popped for the warming feature. 30$ vs Butthole hypothermia?

Like, in Minnesota outdoor parking has an electrical outlet so car owners can plug in engine block heaters. Anyone in the Northern States can inform about leaving the water trickling so pipes don't freeze in winter.
 

EllieP

Worshipped Member
Gold
Joined
Sep 21, 2009
Posts
9,923
Media
4
Likes
22,053
Points
318
Location
USA
Sexuality
100% Straight, 0% Gay
Gender
Female
I was so tempted to get a bidet for my toilet. When I redid our bathrooms I sprung for a $2K Japanese toilet for him, and I seriously thought about a bidet for my own. I chickened out. To this day I don't know why. To this day I don't know why the U.S. has been so dead set against bidets when they're so practical!

I saw an ad recently about an add-on version, much like @evilluvsme mentions. It said if you step in dog poop would you rather wipe of your shoe with paper or hose it off? Duh!
 

halcyondays

Worshipped Member
Joined
Feb 22, 2014
Posts
6,359
Media
2
Likes
10,358
Points
158
Location
US
Sexuality
80% Straight, 20% Gay
Gender
Male
I have one but rarely use it because my butt is clean as a whistle after I defecate.

If it's not I adjust diet and/or eating habits until it is. :cool:
 

Motion-of-the-Ocean

Worshipped Member
Verified
Gold
Joined
Jun 7, 2013
Posts
9,719
Media
423
Likes
23,124
Points
408
Verification
View
Sexuality
99% Straight, 1% Gay
Gender
Male
I bought one years before and while the wife thought it was too "European" and didn't care for it at first, she felt much different later on, especially when the toilet paper shortage hit. That, and I'm sure the strategically placed jet of water had something to do with it ;).
 
  • Like
Reactions: diver6

andigazed

Legendary Member
Joined
Dec 15, 2007
Posts
890
Media
0
Likes
1,346
Points
323
Sexuality
90% Straight, 10% Gay
Gender
Male
It is a bit archaic to use only dry tissue. Some wet is required to properly clean. Wipe peanut butter on a surface as a test. Wet is required to really get everything.
 

andigazed

Legendary Member
Joined
Dec 15, 2007
Posts
890
Media
0
Likes
1,346
Points
323
Sexuality
90% Straight, 10% Gay
Gender
Male
You would think that this Covid virus turns everyone into a non stop shitting machine considering there is no toilet paper available anywhere thanks to all the idiots buying it all up.

Due to that fact, I went out and found myself a PureSpa bidet for the toilet that bolts under the toilet seat. They have a cold water version or a temp controlled model for an extra $30 or so. All they had in stock was the cold water version so I grabbed it, a little worried about spraying cold water at my asshole but at least I wouldn’t have to worry about toilet paper anymore considering I can’t find any. I bought a couple packs of terry cloths and use them to dry off and then they can be washed. It took a few times to get the technique right but now I got the hang of it. I love it! The clean feeling can’t be beat and there is the bonus of how it feels while using it. First off don’t worry about the warm water version, the cold water ain’t that bad. The feeling of the water at your ass is really nice, sometimes really really nice and it gives me a hard on. I’m ok with that. It feels like a magical tongue licking your hole clean. I can even feel the water going up into my ass a bit too which adds to the overall clean feeling. Toilet paper ain’t really cleaning inside your ass much is it?

I totally recommend a bidet. Now I’m gonna have to look for hotels and resorts with bidets for when I get to travel again. Toilet paper is now a last resort for me.

Hey @evilluvsme

Hygeine practices need to be re thought. Bidets in all public restrooms, with a roll of wet wipes for assurance soap clean, and then toilet paper to dry should be standard now. Also a vending machine with a pair of disposable under garments just in case, would be recommended. Some additional modified hygeine practices I'd like to see are disinfectant wipes, and dry it sheets affixed to high touch public vending machines, inside and outside of elevators, as well as affixed to high touch public doors.
 

andigazed

Legendary Member
Joined
Dec 15, 2007
Posts
890
Media
0
Likes
1,346
Points
323
Sexuality
90% Straight, 10% Gay
Gender
Male
Gloves should be mandatory also. Should the gloves be removed before using the public restroom, wash/dry hands, then don gloves again? Should keep gloves on, use the public restroom, then wash/dry gloved hands?
 

ZarbK

Loved Member
Verified
Gold
Account Deletion Pending
Joined
Mar 4, 2019
Posts
163
Media
0
Likes
566
Points
388
Location
Vancouver (British Columbia, Canada)
Verification
View
Sexuality
60% Straight, 40% Gay
Gender
Male
"Winter is coming"

If ya live above a certain latitude come winter people are gonna wish they popped for the warming feature. 30$ vs Butthole hypothermia?

Like, in Minnesota outdoor parking has an electrical outlet so car owners can plug in engine block heaters. Anyone in the Northern States can inform about leaving the water trickling so pipes don't freeze in winter.
“...Butthole hypothermia...” Lmao!
 
  • Like
Reactions: MickeyLee