Getting closer to best friend

Discussion in 'Relationships, Discrimination, and Jealousy' started by lookingforhung, Jul 10, 2009.

  1. lookingforhung

    lookingforhung New Member

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    First, I'm bi and he's straight. (though I don't know the percent lol)

    I've been great friends with a bud of mine for over a decade. (I'm only 24..so we knew each other even in elementary) We get along really well and would do anything for each other. He always wants to hang out with me. I do with him as well but I'm more independent minded and sometimes I need my space.


    In any case, recently, because of some procedure he had to get done (do to an accident) he told me a story where basically a male nurse complimented him on his dick. He said "impressive". I'm hung myself and totally into hung guys.

    Now I'm totally starting to buy this, "you don't have to be gay to show your friend your dick", "you don't have to be gay to give each other a hand-job"..etc..so what would be a good way of going about it? How do you get into something like this? is an email ok to start? lol

    I'm not even worried about that really..the biggest thing..is that he comes off very asexual. He says he rarley jacks off. He talks a lot about having a family in the future and gets excited about the thought of having kids. Yet quiet recently he expressed an interest to know about my sex life and he wanted details. So that confuses me. Is there such a thing as a really asexual guy?
     
  2. B_curiousaboutthis

    B_curiousaboutthis New Member

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    Here is what I would do. Get him to hang out with you at your place, if you drink get some beers. Don't get him drunk just enough to relax the atmosphere. Leave some porn out, maybe even keep one playing in the DVD player. At some point flip to the porn playing do it jokingly. Make some sort of humorous comment about what is going on and start watching it. You will know if he is for or against watching it with you. If he seems overly uncomfortable or leaves the room stop, if he is into watching it you'll see his cock by the end of the night most likely you'll be jacking him off.

    Another way of doing it would to be surf the net with him and stumble onto some solo porn, guys jacking off, start watching it make some humorous comments about the guy and what he is doing. If your friend seems interested in what your watching then same as above.
     
  3. Jason

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    There are guys who are just not that interested in sex. Probably not reading this board, but they exist. If your friend is in this category he is likely to end up in a marriage and with a family.

    Assuming that the story about the male nurse's comment is true, then your asexual friend is just repeating it without any thought about how it will sound to you. He thinks (rightly) that it was an odd thing to say, and my guess is that this is what he is emphasisiing - that the male nurse was unprofessional or plain weird.
     
  4. lookingforhung

    lookingforhung New Member

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    He doesn't drink. He is a really nice guy overall. Very moral, doesn't drink, smoke etc
    Talkative though and more aggresive than me.

    + He isn't religious despite his morality (more spiritual) and he is no prude. I mean he will make sex related jokes and stuff.
     
  5. rd62624

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    Take it slow, does he know that you are bi? How opened minded is he? Which do you value most his friendship or seeing his cock. You stated that he asked about your sex life if he ask what type of guys you like; state his type/ qualities that he posses. (take him skinny dipping ) if all else fails:biggrin1:
     
    #5 rd62624, Jul 10, 2009
    Last edited: Jul 10, 2009
  6. lookingforhung

    lookingforhung New Member

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    Yeah, he knows. I've actually told him more gay than bi really..i prefer guys. He was surprised but accepted it right away.(i knew he would because he's just a really really nice guy) He said our group of friends would have thought he was the gay/bi one way before me hehe I am definetley masculine..played soccer in hs and after on clubs/coach soccer now actually..he on the other hand wrote poems during that time and was always the more emotional one. He's the type of guy who always shares his frustartion etc and constantly puts himself out there. One quality that is totally unlike your pro-typical straight-male. He holds doors for people..I joke that I'll smash it in their face. lol

    I value his friendship greatly so its not a question of which I value more..easily his friendship...but I ask this more could this a) legitimatley make us even MORE closer? b) if he doesnt' even consider it, should i question his friendship? I guess reading this forum over the last little while..people make it seem like its almost natural to get to that stage with a really good friend?
     
  7. rd62624

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    yes it would make you closer. don't question his friendship it may not be to his liking(being with another guy). to get to that stage so do and some do'nt.
     
  8. rbkwp

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    Hi
    You state he is a really nice guy so i dont feel at all that anything that could take place with you guys...at whatever time..will jeopordize your friendship
    I think if your keen to perhaps assist him with what he appears to be searching for ..and your OK with it all..then i think basically you could 'make yourself available' and encoursge him to make the moves and experience that part of his sexuality.
    In saying that i have had it off with quite a few of my Str friends...who are now married with kids...and we are still the best of friends
    Sounds like your the experienced friend ..so its a case of 'helping a buddy' huh
    I just posted a few hours ago re my best sex...happened to be my first with a guy...and i was shit scared- asking for the guys OK,about 20 times?
    Suppose you could have called me asexual at the time?? as for the possibility of a Male Nurse saying that..Of course that could happen easily..heard of Gay Male Nurses.whatever
    GOOOD LUCK matey ..(wish i was in your shoes-haha)
    enz
     
  9. lookingforhung

    lookingforhung New Member

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    lol I did laugh about one thing.

    Recently he wrote a big journal entry because he wanted to expand on some thoughts we spoke about before in person...in any case...he gave me a lot of compliments..saying i've introduced him to so much..and i'm the best person he's ever met..he doesn't deserve me etc...but he ended it saying " i hope i can start bringing more to the table for you lol". It just makes me laugh because this was not that far after we joked about the nurse comments and his penis being big.

    But I guess only a bi/gay guy would take that to mean something more lol
     
  10. lookingforhung

    lookingforhung New Member

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    oh yeah, forgot to mention, but might have been obvious..he's a virgin and sees sex only possible in a real relationship. now i don't know if thats because of something moral or do to fears he actually has.
     
  11. 1NiceRod

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    did you ever consider that he told you about the nurse's comment to see howu you would react?
     
  12. kurt bishop

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    HA! Perfect comment "1NiceRod" exactly my thoughts! I think the whole leave porn out thing is pretty lame.....

    If you guys are close and not sissy close as this is starting to sound.....I value, hes such a nice guy, we are so close...etc.....

    If your trying to get into it with him then here is what most "guys" (straight ) would do about jerking off with a bud. They wouldn’t set anything up like a porno thing - that’s almost seductive.

    Id be more inclined to do something like be very open about jerking off really put the topic out there. Guys who aren’t gay view that two ways funny or its a dead fish and dead fish stink so walk away.

    If he is laughing etc about the topic then be more and more open and self reveling. Eventually you will find his limit about where he is on the topic.

     
  13. lookingforhung

    lookingforhung New Member

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    Maybe... but not like it would matter. I am the one that leads in terms of doing stuff. Like he says he just wants to hang out and stuff, and he wants to hang out all the time, but I'm the one that come up with the ideas. He is not assertive that way. So I just don't see how he would use that info.
     
  14. lookingforhung

    lookingforhung New Member

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    lol clearly you've never had a really really great friend.

    We don't need to act macho or do macho things or whatever. I can easily say that he IS a really nice guy..becaue he is..etc And I want his nice cock in my mouth. :D Frankly that is part of the appeal. The guy is so normal, so nonsexual, so moral. The guys that just whip their cock out..thats not special for me.
     
    #14 lookingforhung, Jul 11, 2009
    Last edited: Jul 11, 2009
  15. rd62624

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    You said that he said a mail nurse complimented him, does not mean that he will fool around. I forgot to mention that a co-worker of mine attended a pool party with his now wife.(they are mid 20's not swingers)They were among friends skinny dipping and some were taking X (esctary). A guy complimented my co-worker about his dick and ask if he could suck it.:biggrin1: To me he freaked, he said he went looking for his wife and found her making out with a chick while two guys were watching.:eek: Sometimes you can make compliments but don't ask to touch because they will freak.:smile: But sometime later he asked me for a ride. His wife had the car, i didn't take him home but to another party scene. He stated if i came in i could have whatever i wanted. If i read between the lines i could have had a female or male that nite.
     
  16. lookingforhung

    lookingforhung New Member

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    lol thats a bi guys/gay guys nightmare scenario. your best friend says they are 100% straight... but then they do something with another guyl That would be horrible.
     
  17. miamirt

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    Sounds like your friend is reaching out to you knowing you like guys and he is confused about who/what he likes but is too shy to ask to sample the "male" platter. I think you need to reassure him it is ok to show your feelings, get real close and he does not back away, put one on him! From there, start undressing him and bingo!!
     
  18. lookingforhung

    lookingforhung New Member

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    I asked him how he sees himself in terms of gay/straight composition..to kinda get an answer..i used this sites system, he said:

     
  19. lookingforhung

    lookingforhung New Member

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    to note..thats not much different then most of his answers lol..he always comes of very neutral
     
  20. Bearnkd

    Bearnkd New Member

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    You can bring up the question and his answer again and tell him you were thinking about it and tell him "should you ever feel the need to try anything out, let me know, I can help" or something along that line.
     
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