GF claims she can't orgasm but gets ultra wet and squirts?

Discussion in 'Women's Issues' started by Goofyjits, Apr 21, 2011.

  1. Goofyjits

    Goofyjits New Member

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    I have bee seeing my girlfriend for some time now, and the entire time we've been having sex she's claimed that she can't orgasm.

    I'm having a hard time with this, not because of any type of ego bruise on my part, but on a confusion level.

    During sex she raves about how good things feel, and tells me to keep going and that I'm hitting a good spot. I'm very well endowed, length and girth as well, and she says I fill her completely.

    She also becomes EXTREMELY wet, and even squirts quite often.

    I believe that she is having orgasms, they just aren't what her idea of them is.

    I am just curious if any women have experience with this. I love her, and I want nothing more than her absolute satisfaction.

    Any help is greatly appreciated.
     
  2. VernalTiger

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    She sounds exactly like me. Sex is pleasurable, oral is great, I get wet, I can squirt, but I don't orgasm. I know I don't. How do I know? Because at even the most intense moments of sex, when we're totally into each other and it's all feeling great, I'll still be thinking, "Shit! I forgot to buy coffee!"

    Believe her when she says she doesn't orgasm. She (most likely) knows her own body best. She's probably spent a lot of time working on the orgasm issue by herself and with others. Personally I'm at the stage now where I don't let my anorgasmia bother me - I focus on the pleasure of the moment, and let it all unfold.

    Just focus on having fun together. Give her pleasure, but don't become 'goal-driven' - if it happens, it happens.
     
  3. Goofyjits

    Goofyjits New Member

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    Thanks for the advice. Very helpful.

    Another quick question. Does sex for long periods of time bother you, and does it feel good enough to where you just don't care?
     
  4. VernalTiger

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    It depends. Long sex is a lot of fun if it's exciting, but if I get bored or too sore then it's time to finish. I find that the really epic, long sex only happens at the start of a relationship, anyway.
     
  5. fire77

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    Most women do enjoy sex without having to orgasm, I get all we and excited sometimes but don't orgasm, although its nice to have that extra icing on the cake it is still just as enjoyable without it.

    I don't know where you got this theory from, maybe its based on your own experience. I still have long and exciting sex with my husband after almost 11 years.
     
  6. Goofyjits

    Goofyjits New Member

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    Thanks ladies! The responses are really appreciated.
     
  7. ManlyBanisters

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    Yeah - don't believe the 'woman doesn't recognise her own orgasm' bollocks you might be hearing or reading. She's going to know if she's cum or not.

    Have you discussed if she cums when masturbating? Does she have orgasms from clitoral stimulation with you but not from piv sex or are you under the impression that she does not orgasm at all, ever?
     
  8. AlteredEgo

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    Sometimes, right before I am about to orgasm, a lot of juice comes out of me. I have never felt this happen, but I know it happens because guys have suddenly said things to me like, "Oh my God! You're fucking coming!" This invariably derails my orgasm. When I then ask them what made them think I had climaxed, they say I suddenly got much wetter. The word surge has been used a few times. Now, I have never felt this "surge" myself. I am just going on what I have been told some guys have experienced with me. That so-called surge is not my orgasm. The sure physical sign I have come is full-body tension, followed by uncontrollable contractions, followed by an deep relaxation.

    I'm not saying you can't be right, but I do think if your girl was having orgasms, she would know, and that while wetness is a sign of arousal, perhaps what you think are signs of orgasm are simply signs she's getting close, and she's just not getting up over the peak. Many women out there say they cannot come. Unfortunately for you both, she is likely one of them.
     
  9. Mike7

    Mike7 New Member

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    Im not sure if we are talking about orgasms during sex? That can be a different kind of o, different nerves then a clitoral o.
     
  10. AlteredEgo

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    Can't have a clitoral orgasm during sex? I shall have to notify my disappointed clit.
     
  11. TashaUK

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    Almost exactly the same for me, except that I used to orgasm, then 18 months ago I went through some surgery down below and have not been able to since.

    I get really wet, experience real highs of intense feelings and squirt, but I no longer get that build-up sensation (akin to sneezing) for long enough periods that results in that 'going over the top' orgasm feeling.

    Now and again I get brief flashes of the old feeling, but they quickly dissipate.
     
  12. dongalong

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    I once had sex with a woman who couldn't have orgasms. I tried all the techniques that usually have my lovers writhing in ecstasy but with her everything failed.

    Women aren't all "wired" the same, they may have fewer nerve endings in their erogenous zones or the route cause can be a hormonal defficiency - for example, women require a certain amount of testosterone to be orgasmic.

    I've read about anorgasmic women who eventually do have orgasms in later life so once the cause is known treatment might help.
    http://ezinearticles.com/?Anorgasmia-Treatments---How-to-Overcome-Anorgasmia-Easily&id=1574009
     
    #12 dongalong, Apr 23, 2011
    Last edited: Apr 23, 2011
  13. VernalTiger

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    Fire77, your edit was too harsh. My statement was "I find that the really epic, long sex only happens at the start of a relationship, anyway."

    And yes, this is based on my own experience. Hence the "I".
     
  14. xX_Sarah_Xx

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    Okay so I was just about to post a new thread when a forum search dug this one up. I think but don't know if the GF of the OP was going through the same as I am, but from the discription it could be. So here goes...


    Whenever I have sex, at some point, I seem to be losing some kind of fluid. It's not pee, it's more like a clear, watery liquid and it doesn't have a strong smell or anything. I've read a lot of the threads on here and it sounds like what people refer to as "squirtin" only, I'm not even close to orgasm when it happens. So to all you ladies (and non-pervy guys that have come across a gf experiencing something alike), anyone an idea of what it is? Why it happens?

    I tried paying attention but I don't feel it coming at all and I don't know when I'm doing it. I don't notice it happened until I feel the blankets being wet. (My scientifical brain doesn't seem to work during sex. - On second thought, maybe that's a good thing. :tongue:)

    Has anyone had this happening? It's not that I'm bothered it happens (aside from the annoying wet mark when you get sleep <_<) but I just want to know what it is...
     
  15. RawDog

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    Sarah, for what it's worth, my wife gets super wet (above & beyond her usual lube) when we stimulate her deep spot. She can squirt as well, but that takes a lot more purposeful stimulation. Same is true with another friend if ours... She says it's more if a whooshing out than squirting, but it's also from stimulating her down deep.
     
  16. xX_Sarah_Xx

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    Thanks for the input RawDog :) It is a kind of whooshing out, it happens in one go. I tried paying attention to the position or what's happening but really I suck at keeping my focus during sex... <_< Great to know I'm not the only one, apparently.

    Maybe I should have just posted a new thread in stead of resurrecting this one... I guess the title isn't very clickable. :p
     
  17. MrGoodDate

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    My girlfriend who is 53 never had an orgasm. Her sex experiences were few and she got pregnant with a girl, who is now grown. We started seeing each other and making love and she loved the many things I did/do for her, but never had an orgasm. I am older and my cumms come slowly myself. We were together 2 years before she had an real orgasm. I think she has a total of three. One good aspect of our relationship is she can go on and on and so can I, we play for an hour of more.... its wonderful.
    In younger days I could come in less than 10 minutes and I would be through...
     
  18. RawDog

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    You are welcome.

    Well then, get back there and do more research! :smile:

    Yes! Especially after 2 posts or more after yours, it gets lost in the banter.
     
  19. AlteredEgo

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    My comments in this thread predate my current lover. He does something with his fingers that is truly divine. I hqveno Iida what he's doing down there, but I tell him not to stop. It makes me wetter than I've ever experienced. Sometimes, he displaces all that wetness with the way he moves his hand, and claims I'm squirting. I could see why he might think so. It has landed on my face, occasionally. But I'm not. He is causing that. And neither that displacement, nor that wetness equals orgasm for me.
     
  20. Tight_N_Juicy

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    I squirt even when I'm not cumming. Most of the time I squirt 2-3 times before I even get close to climax.. There are multiple types of orgasms for women and some ladies do get confused about what a good orgasm can feel like depending on how she's being pleased.. so it's POSSIBLE she's cumming and not knowing it, but more likely that she's just getting really horny and not quite letting the big O go. It's a mental thing a lot of the time when a girl can't cum during sex with a partner.
     
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