Girlfriend cheated on me

huw ginnit

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Do you want every waking moment to be spent worrying about what she's doing, whether you can trust this girl who hasn't shown herself to be trustworthy?

No. Call, it providence, call it circumstance, but the distance between you both might just make you realise the strength ( or lack of) your relationship.

Play the field. Sip from a different cup.... Live a bit.
 

B_Think_Kink

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I feel like a man who has just bought a house, walked in to it and discovers it needs work. WOW!

Before I get into the bulk of this, let me first scold you. YOU ARE NEVER AT FAULT FOR SOMEONE CHEATING ON YOU! Period. End of. I don't care what you do, cheating is on the person that did the act, not the victim of said act.

Now let's look at the facts here...

Originally Posted by Drifterwood

How old are you both? shes 17 and im 18

You both are way too young for this. I met my "true love" at 17, proposed, set a date, she slept with my best friend. My wife? Married at 18 and I am husband #3. Do yourself a favor, live more of your life and learn more about yourself before you give yourself so wrecklessly. You are priceless, the person you spend the rest of your life with should feel the same.

How experienced are you both? shes had 6 boyfriends, sex with 2 of them... 6 girlfriends here, sex with 3 other them.

You two haven't even begun to scrape the relationship surface yet. You two need to date around and experience a LOT more. I promise you, you marry now, it will not last and you will gro to hate each other.


How far apart are you? from one coast to the other

Long distance never works. Very rarely does it work, but even in the maturest of adults, it is hard.

Why are you now apart? family moving

And she'll get to her new home and school, hang out with new friends, meet new boys, and "hook up" with someone new. This is called teenage life my friend.

You don't have to answer of course, but i don't want to give you shit advice.





She has nothing to lose because what can you do a country apart? Not talk to her? Stop torturing yourself and go out and live and ditch the phone sex.



She nailed it here my friend. Go out, hang out with friends, meet new girls and enjoy your life. You'll have plenty of time to sit around the house when you're dead.


A lot of people have given you advice here and it is up to you if you want to take it or not, I would hope you do. You seem too nice and thoughtful a guy to get yourself bittered out in your teens. I'm going to leave you with two quotes that may apply to you in this situation. One of them I've used a hundred times:

"Life is a smorgasbord and most suckers are starving."
--Rosalind Russell as Mame Dennis in the movie Auntie Mame

"If you love something, set it free. If it doesn't return, it was never yours to begin with."
--From the book Jonathan Livingston Seagull
I second everything he said... 17 and 18 is way way to young to be dreaming about marriage.
 

wldhoney

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Anzalone, I agree with other members that you are both far too young to get married. I realize this is hard advice to swallow. We were all your age once, and when you are young it's hard to listen to what you don't want to hear.

Regardless of your choice, I will give this one piece of advice. If you choose to forgive and stay with her, then it means you need to move forward. No throwing it her face when you are mad at her, accusing her of cheating when she is out or late, checking her cell phones.....etc.. Once you tell her you wish to stay with her and forgive her, then you no longer have the right to punish her.

If you feel that you cannot do this, then you need to move on. It means you cannot get past it, which is understandable, and a healthy relationship is not possible. Otherwise, you will continue to be angry at her, hurtful things will be said and done, and you could both wind up with some real emotional damage.

Do not let yourself get caught up in constant angst and chaos. When you are young and in the throes of a first powerful love, a bad relationship can become normal to you and a blueprint for future ones.

I do disagree with the "once a cheater....", especially when someone is young and makes unwise decisions. People are human and they mess up. We all blow it in some way at some point in our lives.
 

wldhoney

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You read.....<snip>

I'm sorry, SLB, but after staring at your new avatar, for all I know it was written in Chinese!

Those girls who have referred to you as "cute", as stated by you in a previous thread, are blind. And idiots. They are blind idiots!

Wow!
 

TheRob

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hey Wldhoney your great honest but I have to say your crazy on this one
if you stay with someone that has cheated on you they dont' have the right to expect you to trust them
it's just stupid to even want that