Girlfriend Cried when I went down on her.

Discussion in 'Relationships, Discrimination, and Jealousy' started by Ruiner, Aug 26, 2009.

  1. Ruiner

    Ruiner Member

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    Hoping for some advice here, because this confused the hell out of me. Met the girlfriend at the beginning of summer. She was very reserved and is very conservative in the way she dresses and acts. ( dissapointing at times, as she is very beautiful. 115lb, 32c's, and a pretty decent ass. ) She really has nothing to be afraid of.

    Anyways, we started off with the basics; making out, neck, chest, feeling around.

    A few weeks ago we moved my stuff down to school as our internship was ending, and in the morning we started getting into it and I moved down below her shorts she had on over the panties, and began to slow caress and feel her. She reacted quite well and began to breathe deep and let out little small moans. So I figured I'd keep going, and began to move her panties aside when she immediately grabbed my arm. ( I let it go, and just kept rubbing from outside the panties ) She soaked her panties, and I went as long as she seemed into it.

    So it moved forward the next week to her feeling me and feeling all around my junk. I finally moved her hand over to it, and she continued with a surprised look on her face. After a little bit, I went back down through her pants to try again. Same situation and after she seemed to reach the max she would ( I wouldn't quite say climax, but she peaked then started to slowly breathe. ) She apologized and said she got carried away after we were done. I told her it there was nothing wrong with that.


    So it comes down to the other night. I begin again and she seems more into it. So of course I'm excited. She begins to thrust upward as I pick up the pace. She continued to moan and breathe deeply, so I began to move down, kissing her breasts, then her stomach, and lower. I moved her pants down and began on top of the panties to kiss, lick, and move around her inner thighs. I finally move in to see how far this will go, and began to lick on and all around her panties just around her lips. (only to discover, not even trimmed... :( )

    Anyways, this goes on for a bit and finally she doesn't seem that into it anymore. She stops responding, so I stop and move her pants back up. She stays quiet and finally curls up into a ball and begins to cry.



    So...... Feel free to give input. All I can guess is that she believes she did something wrong and she let herself go to far. I stuck with her that night and apologized for pushing so far if she wasn't ready. ( nothing else I could do ) after about an hour, she calmed down and said it was ok, and she just wanted to go to bed. So we watched a tv show and went to sleep. She was ok in the morning and hasn't mentioned it since. We've both gone back to school and I won't see her for another week or so.


    Any input or suggestions? She's very shy and I'm afraid to push it. I'd like to be able to pleasure her if we can't have sex ( she's dead set against that, I know until marriage ), and maybe get her to open a little in return on me. She has improved quite a bit as she is willing to kiss all around, and is much more comfortable than when we started.


    Obviously, if she isn't ready, she isn't ready, but how do you take someone who is so shy and cautious about all of this to do the following.


    • Open up
    • Enjoy it
    • Shave.....
    • Enjoy it more! :tongue:

    Thanks for any input guys / girls. Sorry for such a long post. I had to get this off my chest, because this just doesn't seem like a situation you'd run into a lot.


    Thanks again.
     
  2. D_Hyacinth Harrytwat

    D_Hyacinth Harrytwat Account Disabled

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    Since she wants to wait until marriage for sex, maybe you hit it on the nail with "letting herself go to far"? Either that or she's had sexual trauma and that's all I can really think of with that kind of reaction. I cried too the first time someone went down on me but I was having a flashback and blacked out completely.

    Keep taking it slow and she'll probably explain why she was crying as she gets to know you better.
     
  3. THEDUDEofDestiny

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    just dump her
     
  4. Ruiner

    Ruiner Member

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    The obvious answer. I'd feel horrible at this point. I promised her before we got into things that I wasn't trying to just have a summer fling, and I meant it. But if we can't have some fun and be open about sexual things, then that is going to be a pretty big issues.


    :redface: Keep the responses coming though! Will take a look in the morning when I wake up.
     
  5. turnstall

    turnstall New Member

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    why don't you ask HER?
     
  6. dolfette

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    she's made it so damn obvious that she doesn't want to do too much before marriage.
    and rather than respecting her morals, you're here posting her bra size and whining about her not shaving.
    it all just a mission to get inside her pants.
    she deserves better than you,
    so i vote you dump her, you heel.
     
  7. Ed69

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    Big red flag Bill Clinton!!

    For many people oral genital contact is sex.No wonder she swatted your hand and cried when you pushed that line again!I can't believe she stayed in bed.

    On the other hand a girl wanting to wait for marriage doe not get in bed and let a man fondle her privates.That's a prick tease.

    My sister got raped and pregnant playing that game.I say back off till she gets her shit straight.

    Better yet go find a female that knows what when and where she wants it!

    I have to ask why you push oral genital contact,remember that is sex for many people and she wants a ring in exchange for that.

    Second why is she allowing "heavy petting"that leads to sex if she wants to wait?

    In the end you need to talk with her and get this sorted out.
     
    #7 Ed69, Aug 26, 2009
    Last edited: Aug 26, 2009
  8. dolfette

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    yup, that's why it's called 'oral SEX'.

    however i wouldn't say she's a prick tease.
    i think she just gets carried away with lust, as people do, and then catches herself...which he is playing on. i doubt it even occurs to her that someone she knows and trusts could get aggressive over sex.

    she's a naive fuckwit, he's a complete heel.

    girls like her piss me off but not as much as men like him.
     
  9. Piaffe

    Piaffe New Member

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    I'm afraid I can relate to this many years ago.

    I was very naive and a bit influenced by religion.

    Didn't want to wait til I was married before having sex but definately didn't want to give it up to just anybody.

    Me and my boyfriend had a year of fooling around before the first penetration.

    God love him for staying with me.

    If she doesn't have some past trauma she is dealing with and it is just a case of naivity and personal/religious/moral conflict inside her head AND you do really like her and want to give it a go then just take it slowly.

    What she has done so far seems to be a lot for her.

    So just stay at that pace for a while and they she may give you signals to go a bit further.

    Dumping her now would be quite traumatic for her I think.

    The more she trusts you and loves you she will naturally want to do more to you and for you to do it to her.

    Tough one..
     
  10. Wish-4-8

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    At first, I was going to give this compassionate advice, but I would say dump her.

    It has to do with sexual compatability. She wants to wait, you dont and keep getting her to the edge. Her mind conflicted between pleasure and guilt. And you are not helping.

    If you want to fool around, find someone else and respect her postion on sex. Dont try to change her, and she should not try to change you.

    One more thing, how old are you guys?
     
    #10 Wish-4-8, Aug 26, 2009
    Last edited: Aug 26, 2009
  11. dolfette

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    ^^^that's how i would've said it if i was a nice person.
     
  12. D_fsp04gld

    D_fsp04gld New Member

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    Yeah, she just tripped and fell in such a way that her labia and his tongue met; it's totally his fault for getting her to go beyond her limits. Rolls eyes.

    I vote for treating women as if they had some agency of their own instead of indulging facile denunciations.
     
    #12 D_fsp04gld, Aug 26, 2009
    Last edited: Aug 26, 2009
  13. dolfette

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    naive fuckwits are easy to manipulate.
    doesn't mean you should do it.
     
  14. D_fsp04gld

    D_fsp04gld New Member

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    Why are you so quick to say she is a naive fuckwit in the first place, and what exactly is a naive fuckwit... i mean she still decided at some point that she wanted to do it didn't she?

    I don't know anyone, not even any women :p, naive enough not to understand the implications.
     
  15. 2hung4u

    2hung4u New Member

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    So he's manipulative now? Give your gender some credit. The girl isn't a robot.
     
  16. D_fsp04gld

    D_fsp04gld New Member

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    And I don't see this guy as 'trying to manipulate her' , at least if he is trying to do that he doesn't realize it.

    He isn't some schemer just trying to get in her pants despite believing it will hurt her. Rather he thinks he is doing her a favor and helping bond them closer together.
     
    #16 D_fsp04gld, Aug 26, 2009
    Last edited: Aug 26, 2009
  17. Ed69

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    That defines the prick tease!Don't get me hard if you don't want to fuck!

    My sister thought like you till she got raped for playing that game.There are men who don't hear stop once you have them revved up,so don't play that game.Feminist double standards will not help you when he has you pinned down.:frown1:
     
  18. Ed69

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    She said no to sex before marriage.By pushing he is breaking their bond.And she is a fool to play this game with him.
     
  19. dolfette

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    i don't give anyone credit. i'm judgemental and harsh.
    it's one of the most endearing things about me.
    and he's here asking how to get a girl who says no to going further to go further. she's said no. an attempt to work around that is manipuilation.
     
  20. dolfette

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    oh please :rolleyes: i can get some guys hard by walking past them.

    and, personally, i don't even allow men over my doorstep if i'm dating them and have not yet decided i want it to get physical, so you can stuff your 'thought like you' up your arse.

    oh, and your sister got raped because some arsehole chose to rape her.
    decent men stop, no matter how far it's gone. and if it's not feeling good then EVERYONE, male or female, has the right to change their mind.
    i pity the poor cow if this is your version of being supportive. twat.
     
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