Girlfriend doesn't know...

Discussion in 'Relationships, Discrimination, and Jealousy' started by Phobos, Jan 26, 2010.

  1. Phobos

    Phobos New Member

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    ... or, to be honest, neither do I.


    Hi guys and girls, I'm new here and I've got some questions/problems that keep bothering me the last few days/weeks. I hope you can enlighten me a bit.
    Oh, and please excuse any mistakes, English is not my first language :biggrin1:

    The thing is, I've been with my girlfriend for almost 5 years now, and both of us never had any sexual experience beforehand. So, she's still the only one who's seen me fully erect and I'm the only one she's ever seen (apart from one awkward experience in the local sauna with what seemed to be a micropenis, but let's better forget that :eek:), and none of us had sex with anyone else either.
    A few months ago i was still thinking my penis was rather small compared to others. I then once measured my penis and was surprised to find it larger than I had thougt (possibly because of perspective, but might also be because I'm really sh*tty at estimating...).
    A few weeks ago I stumbled upon this site and began some researching. No, I'm nowhere as big as some of the other guys around here, but I came to the conclusion that I'm not small either and definitely on the better side concerning girth. OK, that certainly gave my ego a tremendous boost (not that it needed it :/) and everything was going great.
    And that is where my problem kicks in.
    One of the toys my girlfriend and I own is a Cock ring made out of a kind of rubber, from the german company Fun Factory. This little black thing is quite interesting, it makes my already rock-hard erection even harder and adds a little girth as well, maybe length too, but haven't noticed anything significant here. While I enjoy wearing the rubber thing for a short period of time (<15mins, I guess), it causes quite some pain after a while and especially after ejaculation, when my penis would not be that hard all on its own. No I thought that might be due to the fact that I seem to have more girth than most other guys and complained to my girlfriend about it being too tight.
    And what does she say? "Honey, I think that's the way it's meant to be. I honestly don't believe you're that much thicker than the rest." :eek::eek:
    Yeah, here words. Coming from a woman that can't mean anything less than "Honey, i think you're best friend could even use a few more centimeters..."
    Now, I think I could effectively hide my shock and surprise and didn't further pursue the topic.

    But that leaves me with a few questions...

    -Does she really think I'm (at most) average? Oh, by the way, I am between 7 and 7,5" on a good day, and at least 6" in girth. The hell, my penis is as thick as a frikkin kitchen towel roll! (are they the same size everywhere...?)

    -I think she honestly does not appreciate what she's got in me... I mean, how common is it for the woman to have an orgasm from intercourse only almost everytime, and even squirt only from vaginal intercourse from time to time? Oh, and I sometimes hit her cervix when going at it a bit harder.


    I almost think she needs to go sleep with someone other guys only so she can feel the difference. Lol.
    Or else I need to fuck around so that other, more experienced girls just so I can get other opinions on my size and skills. :banghead2:

    Anyway, I hope you can see my struggle?
    I'm grateful for any thoughts and comments, i very much appreciate your help!

    Yours,
    Robert a.k.a Phobos
     
  2. the_reverend

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    oh, you're plenty big man...of course she doesn't have any perspective, so she probably thinks you're the norm, thus her assumption that the ring is supposed to work like that. i don't think you should take it as a slight on your manhood...she just assumes that they'd manufacture the ring to operate on a normal sized cock. unfortunately, she thinks your cock IS normal sized because you're the only definition of "normal" she has.

    just let her know you're not comfortable using it all the time. find out if sex without it is really significantly deficient for her and discuss what the two of you can do to both get as much enjoyment out of it as possible. if, as you're saying, she's having an orgasm everytime, it can't be TOO incredibly bad. and if you need to inform her, "sweetie, i've been doing some research and i'm a bit on the larger side so that's just something we have to deal with," then so be it. i don't think it needs to go as drastic as either of you cheating to gain more experience or perspective. if you love each other and you get along and the sex is good, anything else can be worked out. best of luck to ya! and welcome to the forum!
     
  3. D_Andreas Sukov

    D_Andreas Sukov Account Disabled

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    Buy another ring? Tell her the averages and get her to measure you. Thats what i did with my ex. Not only was it fun, but it let her see for herself. Dont let something this silly ruin your seemingly fun sex life.
     
  4. Phobos

    Phobos New Member

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    Thanks a lot for your answers, guys!
    Reverend, to be honest, our sex is not bad at all, in fact it is probably better than anything I ever imagined! (You know the saying: Sex is never as good as you imagine jacking off? Guess what, it can be ;) ) And I'm not wearing the cock ring all the time, just maybe once every other week or so, it's just for fun, I don't need it.
    Like you said, the problem is, she thinks I'm (at most) average. And like every man I hate being average... especially when it comes to cock size.

    It's just something that's bogging my mind, and I think it already helped writing all that down... The idea to let her measure me after giving her some hard facts (LOL!) sounds like fun, crazy that I didn't think of it myself. Guess I know what I'll be doing next weekend :)
    So thanks again, and thanks for welcoming me on the forum... I know I should make an introduction but somehow forgot to.
     
  5. helgaleena

    Gold Member

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    Show her this site. People who do not have large cocks also post here.

    As for the ring, if it hurts, she needs to let you stop using it. Love is not supposed to hurt.
     
  6. Wish-4-8

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    If she thinks that is average, I feel sorry for the next guy she is with. She will think he is small. Especially in girth.

    It sounds like both of you are very young. Let me answer some of your questions.

    No, women do not orgasm everytime with penatration alone. Statistically speaking, more dont then do. But there are some who do. And out of those, there are some that will only orgasm if they make themselves orgasm, like if they are riding you on top. And they control the tempo.

    The squirting thing is even more rare. That has to do more with her than you. Some girls squirt, most dont. Or havent discovered how. I made a girl squirt, but that was with oral and fingers.

    Now, as far as what she thinks is average, its hard to say. If she has no experiance, then how would she know what is big or not? My guess is that you both watch porn and she may of gotton a distorted sense of what is real. Or maybe she watches in secret for her own "research".
     
  7. Phobos

    Phobos New Member

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    Dammit Wish-4-8, you might have a point there...
    We did watch some porn together, never thought of this possibility :-/
    And you're right that we are quite young, 23 me and 24 her. I DO know that it's not that common for women to cum everytime let alone squirt. The question is more likely to be, does SHE know? *g*
    Might have to consider talking to her about all that stuff.
     
  8. shr1125

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    Indeed; I am one. I'm on the small side of average (if that) and you're at least 1.5 times my length and girth.

    Without having her sleep around to see what average really is, pointing her to LPSG.org to see where you compare to "large" penises is probably the best you're going to do. Either that or point her to this site, Human Penis Size (Wikipedia), and have her see some of the available data on penis size. If you are truly 7 to 7.5" long, then your penis is larger than 95% of the men in the world. Your girth probably puts you in the second percentile based upon available data.

    I would imagine that the cock ring you own was built for "average," not "top-5 percentile." Help her understand that.

    By the way, your English is quite good.
     
    #8 shr1125, Jan 27, 2010
    Last edited: Jan 27, 2010
  9. Cougar

    Cougar New Member

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    You have already ruined her! If you 2 ever break up she is going to be in for a shock!

    Your english is perfect and I bet your cock would be too if you ever get around to posting a pic :)
     
  10. the_reverend

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    i have never heard that saying, and would point and laugh at the person if i did. ;)

    even if she THINKS you're average...she sure seems to be enjoying what you've got! feel free to clear up any misconceptions she might have, but also understand you've got a great girl who loves your cock, regardless of how big she thinks it is. and she'll most likely continue to when she knows you're actually huge. lol!
     
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