girlfriend whos friends are ALL guys, problem?

[B_Bjen2848]

Really? What's not insulting about being pigeon holed into those three categories? Obviously I have to be one of those because I've made female friends! Except no, that's why it's insulting. I guess I can't REALLY be friends with lesbian, I just have to hope for a pity fuck. :roll:

hows that insulting? everyone here is agreeing its normal for straight women to not be friends with women because they're not sexually attracted to them and they "cause to much drama", "gossip too much" (and various other reasons used) ... now men say it and its insulting? i don't find many females to be my friends for most of the same reasons .... again whats the big deal?

 

[TroMag]

I think that the women of LPSG don't want to believe that almost all of their male friends would fuck them if given the opportunity because they have so few male friends that they see in the same light.

Exactly.

Now of course there are women with straight male friends who DON'T want to fuck them. But that's because the women are sexually undesirable, something most women in that position are loathe to admit to themselves.

 

[TroMag]

I think that all men are perverts who want to stick their dick into anything that walks. That's why I'm only friends with women.

No jokes, no sarcasm here.

EDIT: Before I came to this site, I had no idea how perverted men were.

Your use of the term 'pervert' robs it of a meaningful definition. Men are the way men are because that's the way we are wired. Sure, you could call that 'perverted' if you want to, but then you'd need a new term to define what most of us would call 'perverted'.

But I will acknowledge that your understanding of men seems to exceed that of most of the female posters in this thread.

 

[TroMag]

Exceptions to the rule that a straight male wants to fuck his platonic female friend:
1. he's gay
2. she's unattractive (to him)
3. they've already fucked and he's lost interest in her sexually

Other scenarios fall into the above rule. For example:
-she is dating/married to his close friend - he still wants to fuck her (but if he's a good enough friend to his buddy, won't act on it)
-he is fucking someone more attractive - he still wants to fuck her, but is currently being distracted by a more attractive female.

The above exceptions are it, ladies. So if you have platonic male friends, they:
(1) want to fuck you,
(2) have already fucked you,
(3) are gay or
(4) don't find you sexually desirable.

There are no other options.

Since many women can eliminate two of the 4 options with respect to their male friends - they haven't previously fucked and she knows for a fact he's not gay, it leaves them with the uncomfortable reality that the guy either wants to fuck them or simply finds them sexually undesirable. Neither of these is a pleasant reality, so women will continue to rationalize their way out of it.

 

[Gecko4lif]

Exceptions to the rule that a straight male wants to fuck his platonic female friend:
1. he's gay
2. she's unattractive (to him)
3. they've already fucked and he's lost interest in her sexually

Other scenarios fall into the above rule. For example:
-she is dating/married to his close friend - he still wants to fuck her (but if he's a good enough friend to his buddy, won't act on it)
-he is fucking someone more attractive - he still wants to fuck her, but is currently being distracted by a more attractive female.

The above exceptions are it, ladies. So if you have platonic male friends, they:
(1) want to fuck you,
(2) have already fucked you,
(3) are gay or
(4) don't find you sexually desirable.

There are no other options.

Since many women can eliminate two of the 4 options with respect to their male friends - they haven't previously fucked and she knows for a fact he's not gay, it leaves them with the uncomfortable reality that the guy either wants to fuck them or simply finds them sexually undesirable. Neither of these is a pleasant reality, so women will continue to rationalize their way out of it.

Nice to see someone else agreeing with me. Gotta keep it real

 

[AlteredEgo]

For the record: I said it's not a red flag, not because I deny the possibility that my friends want to fuck me, but because I can't think of a reason to want to fuck them. I really do not think most of my friends want to fuck me, for whatever reason. Most of them are paired off. Some of them have been around me since the primordial ooze. Some of them are my husband's friends. Some of them, well, I'm not their type. Nearly all of them knew me when I was sleeping around and never gave the weakest signal that they wanted me to consider them. Or, maybe I'm wrong, and they've all deposited me in the spank bank. As I have said before, I don't care what they want in that regard. I'm not interested in any of them sexually, because I am in a monogamous relationship, and they are all brotherly. Therefore, they can want in one hand, and shit in the other, and see which one fills up first. I really just can't see what someone else's desires or motives have to do with my trustworthiness.

 

[BayAreaGuy]

The only thing more puzzling than the "diagnose this" questions on this forum are the people willing to give it a try.

The answer is, NOBODY KNOWS BUT HER! So, whom do you think you should be asking?

 

[BayAreaGuy]

I've had female friends almost my entire life, and I've caught some shit for it from their boyfriends sometimes.

My friend's husband complained once about me being at their house when he was away for a business trip. She said, "What the big deal? He's gay." He replied, "I know he's gay, but he's STILL a man. And men have urges, Kathryn." LOL

She said, "You're really not that bright, are you?"

 

[BS76]

Similar to Elaine Benes, my current girlfriend has all guys as friends, should there be concern?

Short answer, yes.

 

[SprinkleMe69]

Well 99% of my friends are guys. I have one female bff and all other females are simply acquaintances, we don't hang or go get nails done or anything because #1 I'm not that kind if chick. I get along better with guys and that's just how I roll.

 

[Guy-jin]

I'm a 100% straight man, and I agree with BayAreaGuy.

Who knows if this girl having guy friends is a big deal but the OP and her? Nobody here.

And dudes who seriously live their lives wanting to fuck everything with a vagina between its legs are ridiculous. I don't think any man with half a brain actually thinks that or behaves that way. I've certainly known sub-Neanderthals that would match up to that stereotype, but saying all men are like that is ridiculous.

 

[Ethyl]

Most of my friends are male. Both straight and gay. Like AE, most of the girls I consider friends have been in that standing for years. My male friends would never bust a move because unless I've stated otherwise, the arrangement in the friendship is that there is no sexual involvement. It doesn't matter if the guy wants it. He won't get it. He knows it. If he wants to be my friend he will respect my wishes. That's why they're my friends. They're considerate and supportive.

Unlike some of the buffoons on this thread who insist every guy is a dog and will do whatever it takes to get in his female friend's pants at any cost, I say you're full of shit. The guys who do this don't have many female friends or any that are meaningful relationships. They're just players. Know the difference. We do.

 

[TroMag]

Unlike some of the buffoons on this thread who insist every guy is a dog and will do whatever it takes to get in his female friend's pants at any cost, I say you're full of shit. The guys who do this don't have many female friends or any that are meaningful relationships. They're just players. Know the difference. We do.

Nice strawman.

 

[Ethyl]

Nice strawman.

You disagree?

 

[TroMag]

You disagree?

I think your reading comprehension skills could use a lot of work.

Having engaged you in threads in the past, what I find most appalling is not your apparent inability to read with any real understanding, but your propensity to call your intellectual superiors 'buffoons' and the like. But this is the interwebs, so carry on.

 

[Ethyl]

I think your reading comprehension skills could use a lot of work.

What makes you think I was talking about you? Oh that's right. You wouldn't have answered my post without thinking you were included in the buffoon group.

 

[Ethyl]

Having engaged you in threads in the past, what I find most appalling is not your apparent inability to read with any real understanding, but your propensity to call your intellectual superiors 'buffoons' and the like. But this is the interwebs, so carry on.

You haven't even bothered to explain why you disagree with me. If you're so "intellectually superior" then explain why I'm wrong.

 

[AlphaMale]

Personally, I don't see how a girl can have a guy "friend". Always, one or both parties will be attracted to and "want" the other.

Now, I suppose the girl can just say "no" but some guys are very persistent. Having said that perhaps I know not whereof I speak since I don't really have any female friends. Acquaintances, yes but there are no girls I have drinks with or do hobby activities with (besides shagging).

Pretty much exactly my thoughts. Platonic relationships in any form are few and far between.

==

Also, from my personal experience... girls who only have guys as friends are usually so mean and nasty to other women that no girls want to be their friend so they are left with no other choice but to befriend guys.

Women have more in common with women, and they have very little in common with guys. Unless they are the tom boy type, or the type that wants to "do guy things" to fit in.

My friend's wife is the "do guy things" to try and fit in type. She wears male football jerseys on game days, is part of their fantasy football league, and wants to play every video game he is playing just so she can play it with him (even though she's terrible at them), etc. Don't hate me for saying this but it's kinda lame imo. She really goes out of her way to "be one of the guys".

==

I would say it depends on how long she's had these guy friends.

Is she making new guy friends rather often or does she have a small, core group of friends that she's known for decades?

Great point also.

 

[D_ewjjde]

OP: Every situation is different. It really comes down to how much you trust your girlfriend. I'm sure most of her guy friends will be respectful of your relationship. However, I would watch and weed out the sleazy little fucks who attempt to fill that "bff" role. The ones that are constantly trying to take her out to lunch, who just "drop by" to see her. Eventually they always attempt to "tell her how they feel". It's not really a threat, it's just annoying and it puts a strain on the relationship, especially when you see it coming and she insists that "Gary is just my BEST FRIEND". He'll be the guy waiting to make a move if you guys have a rough patch.

To some of the ladies posting in this thread: It is absolutely insane how much you do not understand men.

As has been stated, any heterosexual male who is not committed to a relationship will sleep with any of his female friends he finds attractive if the opportunity presents itself. And the more he drinks, the more likely his definition of attractive loosens.

If you really want to test it, those of you that are single, go ahead and make the first move on any of your male friends. See how many stop you and say "I don't want this to affect our friendship".

 

[HorsemanUK]

Exceptions to the rule that a straight male wants to fuck his platonic female friend:
1. he's gay
2. she's unattractive (to him)
3. they've already fucked and he's lost interest in her sexually

Other scenarios fall into the above rule. For example:
-she is dating/married to his close friend - he still wants to fuck her (but if he's a good enough friend to his buddy, won't act on it)
-he is fucking someone more attractive - he still wants to fuck her, but is currently being distracted by a more attractive female.

The above exceptions are it, ladies. So if you have platonic male friends, they:
(1) want to fuck you,
(2) have already fucked you,
(3) are gay or
(4) don't find you sexually desirable.

There are no other options.

Since many women can eliminate two of the 4 options with respect to their male friends - they haven't previously fucked and she knows for a fact he's not gay, it leaves them with the uncomfortable reality that the guy either wants to fuck them or simply finds them sexually undesirable. Neither of these is a pleasant reality, so women will continue to rationalize their way out of it.

Have to agree, that pretty much covers it. Hence why 'untrustworthy' or attention seeking women will surround themsleves with male 'freinds' rather than female freinds, knowing the guys are str8 they like the attention of knowing they are desired. Females know what they are and wont befreind them or have experienced the type of person they are and fell out with them. Thus only guys are left to befreind because the guys who befreind women are thinking of the pussy not the personality (Might be a blunt way of putting it but lets be honest here). For the purposes of the OP's thread, if a guy is dating a women with mainly male freinds you've just got to watch out for the signs that your girl may be the attention seeking untrustworthy type (Spends more and more time with 'freinds' one in particular, is defensive of criticism of this 'freind', turns down spending time with you in favour of her 'freind'), is so pull the plug and move on. Thats not to say a women isnt just naive to mens intentions and really dont want to have anything more than freindship with her male freinds.