Girls Kiss It's Ok...Guys Kiss Then It's Gay?

JackbytheSea

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I have to agree with that post.

The minute I see some guy going on and on with some, "Look at those ~@&s!" crap, the first thing I'm inclined to do is look him over. So what, if two guys are making out? And if they're so repulsed, why-why-WHY do they keep gawking at them?

I know this is a generalization, but, it always seems to be the super-macho type with this problem. It's like two men have found some way to connect, other than crashing into each other in helmets, and they can't bear to think it might actually be working for them. It really freaks them out.

Anyhow, I think most of us feel threatened by the possibility of enjoying a physical expression of love from/with another man. We've been raised to think such things weaken us, when they are actually very powerful and affirming.
 

Sabln7

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I had to take a psychological test for a job once. In the test was a question of some sort that asked whether or not I would ever kiss a person of the same gender. I agonized over the question. I was afraid that if I put yes, it would cause me not to be hired because they would assume I was gay (which I am, but that was years ago when there was no tolerance in the work place for gays). Then I was afraid if I stated "no" that they would consider me a cold person who could not even kiss his father on the cheek. I finally marked "yes." And I did get the job. The mere fact that I had to agonize so much over that question speaks to our social taboos over male kissing.
 

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Sabln7 said:
I had to take a psychological test for a job once. In the test was a question of some sort that asked whether or not I would ever kiss a person of the same gender. I agonized over the question. I was afraid that if I put yes, it would cause me not to be hired because they would assume I was gay (which I am, but that was years ago when there was no tolerance in the work place for gays). Then I was afraid if I stated "no" that they would consider me a cold person who could not even kiss his father on the cheek. I finally marked "yes." And I did get the job. The mere fact that I had to agonize so much over that question speaks to our social taboos over male kissing.

I am quite surprised that a Job application would ask you questions for your sexual preference. What was the position you applied for? I thought that sexual orientation wasn't allowed to affect your getting a job?
 

BigEhcky29

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Mkymkus said:
Clearly there is only one reason. Men are weaker. Guys who freak about this have to be a little bit hysterical. But really going on about a kiss or somebody looking at your dick seems like the male equivalent of a bunch shrieking girls--just in a lower key. Maybe weak guys think being gay could be contagious, and even the sight of a gay kiss could contaminate their sexual orientations.

Women have more confidence or more brains. They know a kiss is not going to change a damn thing. Not even an orgasm with another girl. Nothing is strong enough to change a real orientation, and most of them know it by instinct.

I can't imagine some confident straight guy with solid sexual experiences getting very bothered about how other people kiss or who they kiss and why. I can't imagine he would be interested enough to care. There is something bogus about going on and on about what you don't like, instead of simply doing what you do.
Wow, what a load of shit. The reason I don't like watching two guys kissing, is the same reason I don't like watching people eat that weird crap they have them eat on Fear Factor, it's fucking disgusting...to me, at least. Whatever some women, and or other guys, find to be a turn on doesn't mean a thing to me.

Now before at least a few of few start on me with that same, tired and old, crap about being homophobic and "scared it'll change my orientation"...consider this. Last weekend, I was woken up from being passed-out-drunk at a party (I'm in college) by a seriously confused gay guy pulling out my undershirt and trying to get his hand underneath my belt and at my cock. Are you fucking kidding me? He deserved to have had his face broken by me at that point. What did I do? After making a vain attempt to push him away and mutter some incoherent babble I went home from the party. Now, unfortunately, he happened to be a visiting friend of one of my female roommates. So he followed me back to my apartment, of course. Finally I strung together a coherent sentence and told him "Look, I don't know what kind of impression I gave you, but I ain't gay. So whatever you want to happen...it ain't gonna happen." This didn't even register in the psychotic fag's mind, and he continued to pursue me. (Ok, this is diverting me from my point, so I can write up the entire story of that night if any of you are interested in hearing the whole thing.)

Did I absolutely freak out about it? No. Do I absolutely hate seeing, or the thought of being involved in, anything gay? Yes. No matter if the two guys kissing are "straight", they are still involved in a gay, sexual act. To me it's the same thing as seeing your parents involved in some kind of sexual act (And how the original poster described the two girls "searching for lost treasure in each others throats", is something sexual). You don't really wanna see that, it's two people you don't think of in anyway as sexual, involved in something sexual. And the sight of it is disgusting. A kiss on the cheek between two close male friends? Whatever, I don't do it, but that's how you wanna show your friendship, go for it.

Women have more confidence or brains because they're comfortable kissing each other? HA. Lets get real here, the situation the original poster is talking about is two young girls making out with each other in front of a group of guys. The vast majority of these 'women' kissing each other, are young and insecure girls doing it for the attention. Maybe guys don't feel the need to resort to making out with one another to get attention from girls. I guess that would then make us the 'smarter and more confident" group right? No, I don't even think that. Just goes to show how ridiculous your statement is. Both men and women are smart and confident in their own way. These girls are smart enough to know it'll bring attention to them, and confident enough to know it doesn't mean they're lesbians. Guys on the other hand, are smart enough to know resorting to a gay act for attention is absolutely pitiful, and are confident that there are a hell of a lot better ways to get attention.

Well that was my first post. Glad I could introduce myself on such a good note lol. Let me know if you wanna hear about my night of being terrorized by a gay guy. I still can't believe that shit actually happened, but looking back on it, it was pretty funny.
 

JackbytheSea

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What's sexual about a kiss on the cheek between brothers or close friends? It's not sexual at all, but a simple expression of love or friendship. It is a way of telling someone that they are precious to you - that's all.

Sometimes, the people in our lives need that from us and to receive it, without our judgment.

Why are some of us so bent out of shape by this?
 

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BigEhcky29 said:
...
Now before at least a few of few start on me with that same, tired and old, crap about being homophobic...He deserved to have had his face broken by me at that point. ...This didn't even register in the psychotic fag's mind, and he continued to pursue me. ...Did I absolutely freak out about it? No. Do I absolutely hate seeing, or the thought of being involved in, anything gay? Yes. ...Glad I could introduce myself on such a good note lol. Let me know if you wanna hear about my night of being terrorized by a gay guy. I still can't believe that shit actually happened, but looking back on it, it was pretty funny.
Welcome, BigEhcky29. Interesting first post. Let me ask just a couple of questions... If you were pretty drunk, and put you hand on some girl's tits, would you "deserve to have your face broken" by her (if she has a baseball bat handy...)? And you don't consider it to be freaking out if you think about breaking some guy's face? You sound both insecure and self-conflicted.
 

BigEhcky29

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DC_DEEP said:
Welcome, BigEhcky29. Interesting first post. Let me ask just a couple of questions... If you were pretty drunk, and put you hand on some girl's tits, would you "deserve to have your face broken" by her (if she has a baseball bat handy...)? And you don't consider it to be freaking out if you think about breaking some guy's face? You sound both insecure and self-conflicted.

Well, theres the first "insecure" comment...Read over what I said again, I was passed out, he was trying to fondle someone who was drunk asleep. When I told what happened to my roommate after that guy left our apartment, that's the first thing she said to me. Why didn't you punch him in the face? He completely deserved it for doing that, but I didn't freak out. And I would never, no matter how drunk I was, do anything like that to a girl (assuming we're strictly talking about going around groping un-willing girls). I'm completely against abusing girls, and I never get to the point of doing things I wouldn't normally do while drinking. If some guy did do that to an unconcious girl, I'd find a beat the crap out of the guy response appropriate as well. In fact, I've told my roommates to let me know if any guys get out of hand at our place (all my roommates are girls).
 

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Well, I was out with some buddies the other day watching the World Cup Soccer . One team greeted it's players coming off of the field with a kiss, and a friend of a friend commented, "That's why soccer will never be popular in the U.S. Because the players are all a bunch of skinny fags." It took every ounce of self control not to just go balisitic on the dude - but what do you expet? When this country's national leaders are all homophobic bible thumping neanderthals, that attitude is going to trickle down to the masses.

There is nothing wrong with two men greeting eachother with a sign of affection. This uptight society that we all live in has to attach "sex" to everything. Pretty pathetic.
 

BigEhcky29

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And thanks for the welcome, by the way. I've been reading this forum for 2, maybe 3 years now, but never really got along to post anything.
 

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Proudly_Italian said:
It is not a matter of okay vs not okay kisses. Both are homosexual acts. The difference is that straight men are often (not me) turned on by lesbians, while women find rarely exciting the wiew of two guys kissing.

Whats really wierd about this is that a friend of mine who is a lesbian, gets turned on like no other when she sees two guys going at it, I thought it was interesting.
 

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For me, it's about my personal preference for beauty.
If I saw two ugly girls (or guys) kissing, I would be disgusted. Two beautiful girls (or handsome guys) kissing, I would like to watch.
 

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Someone asked something about women liking gay porn...

Guy-on-guy action turns me on more than anything else, and if I watch porn it's always gay porn, never het.

I know lots of other girls/women who enjoy watching and/or reading about two guys getting all hot and bothered together. :tongue:

And yes, I'm a girl too, and married to a guy. :smile:
 

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BigEhcky29 said:
Wow, what a load of shit. The reason I don't like watching two guys kissing, is the same reason I don't like watching people eat that weird crap they have them eat on Fear Factor, it's fucking disgusting...to me, at least. Whatever some women, and or other guys, find to be a turn on doesn't mean a thing to me.

Now before at least a few of few start on me with that same, tired and old, crap about being homophobic and "scared it'll change my orientation"...consider this. Last weekend, I was woken up from being passed-out-drunk at a party (I'm in college) by a seriously confused gay guy pulling out my undershirt and trying to get his hand underneath my belt and at my cock. Are you fucking kidding me? He deserved to have had his face broken by me at that point. What did I do? After making a vain attempt to push him away and mutter some incoherent babble I went home from the party....

Oh, look... a reason for me to make my first post (and sorry for the lack of introduction, everyone else):

This scares me. Before this guy had really done anything to you, before you explained yourself as being straight, before he actually touched your cock, you were ready to break his face?

I barely know how to respond other than "wow." I read the rest of your post, but it still sticks in my mind that you would beat the shit out of someone because they mistakenly thought you might be gay too and hit on you...

If you're not really this violent a person, please strongly consider your words in the future. Thanks.
 

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BigEhcky29 said:
Women have more confidence or brains because they're comfortable kissing each other? HA. Lets get real here, the situation the original poster is talking about is two young girls making out with each other in front of a group of guys. The vast majority of these 'women' kissing each other, are young and insecure girls doing it for the attention. Maybe guys don't feel the need to resort to making out with one another to get attention from girls...
I found it interesting that numerous comedy skits featured males kissing and these were not seen as being revolting at all and it surely was done to get attention e.g. Jerry Lewis, Flip Wilson , Chris Rock, Sat. Night Live etc.

As Mkymkus said only a few men would be hysterical about this. When dared to do it by girls most would laugh about it. If the girls promised them a snog( or some other enticement) as Nicole and Paris did in The Simple Life, few would refuse to kiss.

loo dreamer20
 

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BigEhcky29 said:
Well, theres the first "insecure" comment...Read over what I said again, I was passed out, he was trying to fondle someone who was drunk asleep. When I told what happened to my roommate after that guy left our apartment, that's the first thing she said to me. Why didn't you punch him in the face? He completely deserved it for doing that, but I didn't freak out. And I would never, no matter how drunk I was, do anything like that to a girl (assuming we're strictly talking about going around groping un-willing girls). I'm completely against abusing girls, and I never get to the point of doing things I wouldn't normally do while drinking. If some guy did do that to an unconcious girl, I'd find a beat the crap out of the guy response appropriate as well. In fact, I've told my roommates to let me know if any guys get out of hand at our place (all my roommates are girls).

First of all, I agree that no one has the right to take advantage of you in a vulnerable position. THat is rape, or attempted rape, and it is never acceptable. I also agree that when you told the guy that you weren't interested, he should have taken the obvious hint and left you alone. That was stupid and inconsiderate on his part---some guys would have bashed his face in, and frankly, I wouldn;t have felt to sorry for him, under those exact circumstances. I have, however had gay friends who have been taunted and verbally abused while just walking down the street minding their own business, then the drunken straight boys getting out of their cars and coming over, in a group, to beat up a single gay man at a time. THat is also criminal behavior, and wrong. In that case, I would have no problem supporting the gay man doing whatever was necesarry to defend himself, including killing the attacker. Some gay men are not easymarks, and it would be wise for straight bashers to think twice about attacking some "fag because he deserves it for being a fag". There are assholes of every gender, race, creed, color, national origin and sexual orientation. And there are decent people from every background as well. I do worry that your very FIRST thought to any approach by a gay man is a violent thought, however. THat says that your base feelings are that gay men should be attacked if they make themselves known they are gay. THis, frankly IS inherent homophobia, because it is fear of a specfic group without always having a specific reason why. That is the very definition of a phobia, baseless fear ( and fear comes in many forms, including the reaction of violence against a perceived threat when there is no real threat). I'm not saying you didn't have cause in the case you stated, to be angry and feel abused. But in general, your basic attitude bespeaks a general self generated loathing for gay people in general.
 

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BigEhcky29 said:
Wow, what a load of shit. The reason I don't like watching two guys kissing, is the same reason I don't like watching people eat that weird crap they have them eat on Fear Factor, it's fucking disgusting...to me, at least. Whatever some women, and or other guys, find to be a turn on doesn't mean a thing to me.

Now before at least a few of few start on me with that same, tired and old, crap about being homophobic and "scared it'll change my orientation"...consider this. Last weekend, I was woken up from being passed-out-drunk at a party (I'm in college) by a seriously confused gay guy pulling out my undershirt and trying to get his hand underneath my belt and at my cock. Are you fucking kidding me? He deserved to have had his face broken by me at that point. What did I do? After making a vain attempt to push him away and mutter some incoherent babble I went home from the party. Now, unfortunately, he happened to be a visiting friend of one of my female roommates. So he followed me back to my apartment, of course. Finally I strung together a coherent sentence and told him "Look, I don't know what kind of impression I gave you, but I ain't gay. So whatever you want to happen...it ain't gonna happen." This didn't even register in the psychotic fag's mind, and he continued to pursue me. (Ok, this is diverting me from my point, so I can write up the entire story of that night if any of you are interested in hearing the whole thing.)

Did I absolutely freak out about it? No. Do I absolutely hate seeing, or the thought of being involved in, anything gay? Yes. No matter if the two guys kissing are "straight", they are still involved in a gay, sexual act. To me it's the same thing as seeing your parents involved in some kind of sexual act (And how the original poster described the two girls "searching for lost treasure in each others throats", is something sexual). You don't really wanna see that, it's two people you don't think of in anyway as sexual, involved in something sexual. And the sight of it is disgusting. A kiss on the cheek between two close male friends? Whatever, I don't do it, but that's how you wanna show your friendship, go for it.

Women have more confidence or brains because they're comfortable kissing each other? HA. Lets get real here, the situation the original poster is talking about is two young girls making out with each other in front of a group of guys. The vast majority of these 'women' kissing each other, are young and insecure girls doing it for the attention. Maybe guys don't feel the need to resort to making out with one another to get attention from girls. I guess that would then make us the 'smarter and more confident" group right? No, I don't even think that. Just goes to show how ridiculous your statement is. Both men and women are smart and confident in their own way. These girls are smart enough to know it'll bring attention to them, and confident enough to know it doesn't mean they're lesbians. Guys on the other hand, are smart enough to know resorting to a gay act for attention is absolutely pitiful, and are confident that there are a hell of a lot better ways to get attention.

Well that was my first post. Glad I could introduce myself on such a good note lol. Let me know if you wanna hear about my night of being terrorized by a gay guy. I still can't believe that shit actually happened, but looking back on it, it was pretty funny.

relax on the "gay act" thing in your second to last paragraph. and you do seem a bit uptight. otherwise, i am sympathetic to your post. if two girls or two guys kiss, its their business, not necessarily an act for attention. i do kiss my nephews on the cheek, and some gay friends on the lips when we say goodbye - theres nothing gross about it.

if someone hits on you, and continues to hit on you after youve been clear its not wanted, *and* you were in a vulverable situation, then they deserve aggression if you feel like giving it. you didn't, and for that are to be commended. i have not been so upstanding when faced with a similiar situation. no means no. back the fuck off.

a few years back, a much older guy i was not interested in used to hit on me constantly whenever i would see him out. i tried being nice. didn't work. tried being mean. didn't work. he followed me into the mens room at a club one night and called me "prince georges county white trash". (locals will understand this). i laughed and returned to the bar. when he went for it again, i read his ass in front of a bunch of people and threw a drink in his face. guess what. he never bothered me again. so excuse the semi violent homophobic response from this gay guy. it was deserved.
 

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curiousobserver said:
Oh, look... a reason for me to make my first post (and sorry for the lack of introduction, everyone else):

This scares me. Before this guy had really done anything to you, before you explained yourself as being straight, before he actually touched your cock, you were ready to break his face?

I barely know how to respond other than "wow." I read the rest of your post, but it still sticks in my mind that you would beat the shit out of someone because they mistakenly thought you might be gay too and hit on you...

If you're not really this violent a person, please strongly consider your words in the future. Thanks.

Did you read past my first post here before you responded to that? Because my response to dc_deep made it clear that I was passed out as he made a move, had he made a move on me while I was awake (which I'm hoping would have been much more subtle) I'm not sure exactly what I would have said or how I would have acted, but I wouldn't respond with violence. And although he hadn't gotten to my cock inside my pants yet, he was also rubbing me through my pants with his other hand. I think almost every one would have found it understandable for me to react with violence at that point.

And it's still a mystery to me, and other people, as to how he could have thought I was even slightly gay. I ended up telling this story to everyone of my roommates, and their best gay guy friend. When I got to the part about telling them "I don't know what impression I gave to you...", he told me that he's not sure how that kid could have even gotten that impression, he didn't think it possible for anyone to get that impression off of me.

David, I do not loath or bash gays. As mentioned before, my roommates have tons of gay friends, so much so that they went to an all gay guy party last night (I'm guessing they needed a break from getting hit on). Their best friend (the guy mentioned above) is at our apartment almost every night of the week, and I think he's a pretty cool guy. I've known from the beginning he was gay, since the first time I met him he was looking through pictures of naked men with my roommates. I talk to him about school and shit like that occasionally, and I went to his birthday party a few months ago. There was a lot of gay guys at that party, which didn't bother me....although I did leave the room when there was a lot of kissing goin on, cause as I said, I don't wanna see that. I have no phobia, but I'd think even a gay guy in my situation (providing he didn't find the guy attractive) would have been ready to punch him after waking up with his hands going underneath your belt. Because that is a sexual assault.