Go Back To Being Fully Straight?

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4950851

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Who better to ask than gay men?

Basically (imma try keep this short) I'm a straight guy who has a fetish/kink for gay sex and porn because of how taboo it is, which I still find extremely arousing. What started as passing gay thoughts here and there, escalated to porn, and now frequent gay sex which only stops my urges for a little while before I'm craving again. Usually in the past I could easily ignore these urges etc. to remain comfortably straight, but nowadays the more I have sex with men, the less I'm interested in fucking women; I feel like I'm becoming way too gay that I won't be able to maintain my straightness at this rate.

Short story short - How do I erase these homosexual urges so that I'm back to square one? It's not the lifestyle for me.
 
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gr8gatsby

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Who better to ask than gay men?

Basically (imma try keep this short) I'm a straight guy who has a fetish/kink for gay sex and porn because of how taboo it is, which I still find extremely arousing. What started as passing gay thoughts here and there, escalated to porn, and now frequent gay sex which only stops my urges for a little while before I'm craving again. Usually in the past I could easily ignore these urges etc. to remain comfortably straight, but nowadays the more I have sex with men, the less I'm interested in fucking women; I feel like I'm becoming way too gay that I won't be able to maintain my straightness at this rate.

Short story short - How do I erase these homosexual urges so that I'm back to square one? It's not the lifestyle for me.
Embrace who you are and like what you like. Forget the labels.
 

Brodie888

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You are not straight, you are not gay. You are bisexual. Period.

In my opinion, where you are on the bisexual spectrum, probably on the gay half of it.

I had a friend in school who never ate junk food. He was perfectly happy with rye bread, cottage cheese and boiled chicken sandwiches for lunch. Then he went on a school excursion and had a KFC and his world changed. Ignorance is bliss but not the truth.

You probably enjoy gay sex more because you are closer to the gay end than the straight end. The reason why gay sex seems to be getting better and better is because the inexperience, fear, insecurity or shame that has been drummed into you from family/religion/society is fading and you are enjoying being the true you.

In regards to going back to being straight rather than bisexual; you can be with a woman if you want but that's not who you are and you will always feel conflicted. You can't go back to something you never were. The ugly duckling was never a duckling, it was always a swan.
 

Brodie888

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What you are dealing with is normal. The hardest part is coming out to yourself.

Whether gay or bi, it's like going through the seven stages of grief. These are disbelief, denial, bargaining, guilt, anger, depression, and finally acceptance/hope.

You are not alone and it's actually more common than you think. There's actually less men who are 100% straight than those who are bi and gay.
 
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winesthel945

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There are three questions to ask to help you determine your orientation:

1. What do you tell people you are?
2. What do you tell yourself you are?
3. What do you masturbate to?

The real answer is always number 3. The rest is bullshit and games. When you're ready to stop playing games and cut the bullshit, you will be who you are, not who you think you should be. And until you do that, you're going to be miserable.
 

malakos

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Who better to ask than gay men?

Basically (imma try keep this short) I'm a straight guy who has a fetish/kink for gay sex and porn because of how taboo it is, which I still find extremely arousing. What started as passing gay thoughts here and there, escalated to porn, and now frequent gay sex which only stops my urges for a little while before I'm craving again. Usually in the past I could easily ignore these urges etc. to remain comfortably straight, but nowadays the more I have sex with men, the less I'm interested in fucking women; I feel like I'm becoming way too gay that I won't be able to maintain my straightness at this rate.

Short story short - How do I erase these homosexual urges so that I'm back to square one? It's not the lifestyle for me.

What precisely is the lifestyle you're referring to? Do you just mean that having sex with men is not for you? If so, in what way is it not for you, given that it's what you're impulsively inclined towards?

P.S. Don't bother paying any attention to stekz's stupid remark.
 
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4950851

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What precisely is the lifestyle you're referring to? Do you just mean that having sex with men is not for you? If so, in what way is it not for you, given that it's what you're impulsively inclined towards?

P.S. Don't bother paying any attention to stekz's stupid remark.

Well most of my mates are black, stubborn and don't exactly help to break our stereotype if you catch my drift. The DL lifestyle is mentally taxing as it is tbh.

I mean as in the gay lifestyle requires a different social circle that do stuff/go to places which wouldn't interest me nor my current social circle, and vice versa.
 
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There are three questions to ask to help you determine your orientation:

1. What do you tell people you are?
2. What do you tell yourself you are?
3. What do you masturbate to?

The real answer is always number 3. The rest is bullshit and games. When you're ready to stop playing games and cut the bullshit, you will be who you are, not who you think you should be. And until you do that, you're going to be miserable.

I acknowledge this but something always prevents me from cutting the bullshit
 

winesthel945

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I acknowledge this but something always prevents me from cutting the bullshit

This is where some professional help may be useful. Your local LGBT resource center may have some recommendations on support groups, therapists, etc., who may help you explore why this is difficult for you. You deserve to be happy... you owe it to yourself to give yourself that chance. I hope you can work on that!
 

john19532001

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oh, honey, you may as well admit it, you are gay. say it with me, "I am gay."
All your gay lovers know it, all your friends know it, all the women that you have made love to know it and your family knows it. You are gay.

I saw above someone said that the real secret is, what you masturbate to…
Yes, for sure, and if, you are having sex with a woman and begin thinking of cock… well, there you have it. that's the answer.
 

headbang8

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Hey, @BiggDog. I've been there. I didn't want to be gay because I didn't buy the gay "lifestyle".

It took me a while to learn that having lots of gay friends didn't mean a gay "lifestyle". And a boyfriend (later husband) didn't demand a gay "lifestyle", either.

For me, @winesthel945's solution worked. I joined a coming out group at my local LGBT centre. I met gay men of every kind, shape, sort, temperament, and "lifestyle". I learned I could be gay my own way. And fuck the so-called friends who tried to keep me straight.

You be you.
 

englad

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You can't suppress your sexuality is the simple truth, and if you try, it will be at the cost of your mental health. That is not a sacrifice worth making.

There is no "lifestyle" to be part of or not, there is no fixed way to be gay, there are commonalities but how you live your life is your decision. Gay sex isn't some sort of addiction that you can acquire a taste for, and not having it won't make those desires go away. The desires were there before, just sometimes they were at the forefront or the back of your mind. Social circles also aren't fixed, they evolve over time as you do, people come in and out of your life, that's normal.

Finding peace with yourself and who you are is the only healthy option to go for.
 
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4950851

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oh, honey, you may as well admit it, you are gay. say it with me, "I am gay."
All your gay lovers know it, all your friends know it, all the women that you have made love to know it and your family knows it. You are gay.

I saw above someone said that the real secret is, what you masturbate to…
Yes, for sure, and if, you are having sex with a woman and begin thinking of cock… well, there you have it. that's the answer.

I mean the last time I masturbated to something other than gay porn was probably longer than 6 months ago, so damn..
 
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Beanie

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Who better to ask than gay men?

Basically (imma try keep this short) I'm a straight guy who has a fetish/kink for gay sex and porn because of how taboo it is, which I still find extremely arousing. What started as passing gay thoughts here and there, escalated to porn, and now frequent gay sex which only stops my urges for a little while before I'm craving again. Usually in the past I could easily ignore these urges etc. to remain comfortably straight, but nowadays the more I have sex with men, the less I'm interested in fucking women; I feel like I'm becoming way too gay that I won't be able to maintain my straightness at this rate.

Short story short - How do I erase these homosexual urges so that I'm back to square one? It's not the lifestyle for me.
Fuck the labels, you do what feels good to you and don’t feel any type of way about it just do you!
 

Ladavid9

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You can't go back to being straight. You are attracted to men. You're bisexual at the least. Nothing is going to change that whether you want it to or not. I'm really interested in what you mean by saying you're becoming way too gay since the way you state it sounds like you think it's a bad thing.