Going back the other way????

[yngjock20]

I am mentally attracted to women the same way I'm attracted to men, but physically it just doesn't go down...or should I say, "come up." I've tried...done some stuff with girls, but it just wasn't what I was interested in.

 

[wingnut84]

sorry, wingnut84, i did not mean by ANY stretch of the imagination that bi guys are cheating, lying, confused depraved individuals. i've dated openly bisexual guys in the past as well as closeted (to me) ones. i've been cheated on by a closeted bisexual male but never by an openly bisexual male. but WAIT! don't jump on me for intimating that closeted bisexual males are cheating, lying sociopaths! i'm not.

i think that many people who are against dating bisexual individuals, whether they or the bisexual individual is male OR female, is based inherently on their insecurity about giving them what they need. and that might by where MY answer stemmed from.

Thank you for the intellectually honest answer. I didn't mean to jump down your throat, it just seems most (ok... all) of the excuses I hear for why people don't want to date bi guys (and girls, I suppose, but bi girls have an easier time finding welcoming mates, methinks) are pretty much bullshit.

Now, I could understand a woman not wanting to go out with a bi guy who's mostly gay... they would have a valid reason for their insecurity (not that a mostly gay guy couldn't live happily ever after with a lady). However, guys like me who honestly prefer females find it quite irksome that so many of y'all think we're going to jump over to the other team. I guess I blame a lot of it on the "bi now, gay later" guys who use being "bi" as a stepping stone for completely coming out. I'm sure there's a substantial amount of these guys out there and women have good reason to watch out for them (among many other types of bi guys). But it bugs me when females CATEGORICALLY rule out all bi guys because of actions and deceptions (both to the self and others) of certain bi guys.

Anyway, I sympathize with your insecurity. It's a valid one. I think the best thing is for people to be upfront when they start dating. Guys need to tell the women exactly what they need and women need to decide if they can give or live with those needs. Of course, a bi guy could lie about his needs, but lying is certainly not exclusive to bisexuals nor truth to monosexuals! :biggrin1:

(I'm sorry I didn't really talk about bi females and the problems they face from men. Since I'm a male I don't feel qualified to talk about that, but I would love someone to enlighten me!)

 

[lightninggirl]

no worries, wingnut84, i just didn't want to offend anyone.

when i dated an openly bi guy in the past, i had a friend tell me, "i can't believe you're going out with him. if i date a straight man, i only have to worry about him leaving me for 50% of the population [meaning women]. if i dated someone who was bisexual, i've got 100% of the population to worry about!" i agreed with her ... to a point. but i had to quickly point out that although we're sexually driven as humans, we have a choice whether to cheat or not.

i also had to remind her that cheating is oftentimes NOT sexually-based, especially for women (again, not making a blanket statement here that only men cheat for physiological reasons!).

and i've gone out behind a boyfriend's back with another woman before, so i definitely don't have room to talk! i went out with her for emotional reasons. yeah, that's it!

 

[Principessa]

*BUMP*​