Going to a Gay Bar

Discussion in 'Et Cetera, Et Cetera' started by mephistopheles, Jul 3, 2010.

  1. mephistopheles

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    The other night I was sitting around with my friend Aubrey.

    I confided in her with the info I already gave out here on my sexuality.

    So she and my other friend Abby wanna take me to a gay bar next week.

    I'll post more after I've been there.


    PS, All of my females friends are excited at the idea of having a new "girlfriend", but its kinda funny: I've always been very feminine, they just didnt realize it until I told them I liked dudes as well.
     
  2. HakaiToson

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    Hope you have fun. And please let us know what happnens. :)
     
  3. B_Lightkeeper

    B_Lightkeeper New Member

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    I remember my first gay bar. I sat at the table crossing and holding my arms to keep them from shaking! :redface:
     
  4. pleasureboy

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    It can be weird at first. Especially if you're like me and straight in every way except sex itself. A lot of women immediately assume you'll be their gay (and that usually means like you said another "girlfriend"). Enjoy the support, and don't let them hook you up with everyone they meet (you'll probably find that women have entirely different taste in men than men do). But at the same time, remember that you're still you in every way, and even if you become cool with your sexuality and even fully open and out, being gay is just a part of you. You don't need to change anything or act a certain way.

    A lot of people may make you feel like you need to fit a stereotype. Don't.
     
  5. Smaccoms

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    yea, I agree with this guy, forget about labels and stereotypes. Those are for other people so they know how to judge you and how to treat you. But what's going to be more important to you? Fitting a label so other people aren't so scared of you, or being yourself? Growing into yourself takes time, that's for sure...and a lot of thinking (at least for me personally)
     
  6. mephistopheles

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    Yea, I totally agree.

    I am just me, I just so happen to like dudes.

    I'm not going to fake a lisp or anything stupid like that.

    I'm just me.
     
  7. Rikter8

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    Gay bars are usually pretty safe, but you still have to keep your guard up.
    Many straight people now go to gay bars because of not having to deal with competition, and many ladies go to gay bars so they aren't oogled over constantly.

    Plus, I think the drinks and music are way better anyway.

    Enjoy, stay safe.
     
  8. pleasureboy

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    OMG I just realised you're in Joplin, MO. You're going to have to deal with country gays. Good luck!

    For some reason they tend to be the most stereotypical of them all. Just go in knowing that you're hot and have a big cock, and that yeah they are all staring at you (for good reason).

    Just have a good time and be yourself. If you happen to meet a guy you like and start dating, by all means enjoy that too. But, don't think that gay guys just show up and hook up with each other (although from what I understand for the older guys this was pretty much how it used to be). Meeting, dating, and relationships for gay guys tend to be just like they are for straight people these days. But at the same time, if a guy is checking you out in a gay bar you can pretty much return the favor without worrying that he'll freak out that someone has figured out he (str8 guy) likes the cock.

    Also, gay bars are SOOO much more laid back and friendly and you don't have that str8 bar dynamic where the guys are all trying to out testosterone each other and the girls are all on the verge of a cat fight.

    I really don't go to the bars to hook up and have only once actually taken a guy from a bar home. But, it is nice to enjoy the attention, AND I can just feel like I can relax so much more in a gay bar because there is less tension and competition in the air.
     
  9. mephistopheles

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    I've never been to a bar before[let alone a gay bar], so this is going to be a double-whamie. And yea, country gays are kinda weird, but here in a few months I'm moving to Houston. So we'll see how that goes.

    Also, Pleasureboy, I just moved to Joplin from New Orleans.
     
  10. pleasureboy

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    Really? what on earth possessed you to do that?

    Well if you're ever back in town lemme know and we can hit the pube and make fun of all the tourists.
     
  11. mephistopheles

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    I left on less than stellar terms.

    I had moved there with my fiance a few months back.

    We broke it off and I moved back so I can build my money up and move to someplace to go to college.

    My friend Aubrey[the one who wants to take me to the gay bar] is moving there for college, so I think I'm gonna move with her.

    Music, school, and culture.


    Plus Austin is pretty close :p
     
  12. D_Harvey Schmeckel

    D_Harvey Schmeckel New Member

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    From someone who loves NO and Austin but can't stand Houston-- hope it works for you, always remember Galveston is nearby for a dose of architectural grace and charm. Re the bar scene, count yourself lucky to be going with a couple of supportive friends! Far better than venturing alone. Going alone to one in Houston sounds like a scary initiation but with this trip under your belt you'll feel more prepared for it.
     
  13. pleasureboy

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    Yeah Westheimer can easily lose its appeal after the first week. But still Houston isn't bad.
     
  14. nudeyorker

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    Way back in the day the legal drinking age in Hawaii was 18 and I went to my first gay bar and was so scared. Luckily the people were very nice and welcoming. Just be yourself and relax and have fun.
     
  15. mephistopheles

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    Yea, for the last few years I've been doing more or less everything alone.

    I'm starting to realize friends are a good thing to have.

    None of my male friends are very good friends, but my female friends are to die for.
     
  16. exwhyzee

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    I went to the first gay bar I've been to for years last night. I liked the music a lot. It was good to people-watch. I had forgotten some of the good/fun points of a gay bar. I might go again tonight. :cool:
     
  17. Pendlum

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  18. exwhyzee

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  19. Bbucko

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    I've been going to gay bars since my mid-teens: cruise bars, hustler bars, drag bars, stand & stare bars, leather bars, martini bars...you name it. I've always said that I grew up in gay bars, and to a degree, that's true.

    I worked as a barback at the chicest gay disco in Boston in 1979 and partied myself in Hepatitis B for six months.

    About four years ago the boutique where I worked as the night manager fired me for having the Shingles (short version of a long OT story), so a bartender friend of mine hooked me up at a local bar in FtL. I've been there off-and-on ever since; currently I work six nights a week.
     
  20. Mickactual

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    Ohhhhh clearly You've never been to New York or New Jersey. :tongue:
    Well - You have to be into booze, blaringly loud thumpa-thumpa music, & dancing. I'm not into any of the above, so bars aren't really for me. I'd definitely recommend You go if You've never been before though. Have a blast!
     
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