Groping the chubby parts of my wife.

18wheeler

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My wife is chubby. I LOVE her body, but she is naturally self conscious about it.
When we cuddle and mess around. I love to grope and grab at her tummy when we spoon, hips, and the meat of her thighs. I kiss and bite at the chubbiness of her inner thighs, but I don’t know if she is bothered by it.
Do women like this? Does it bring it too much to your attention and make you feel less sexy? I am grabbing at her because I’m attracted to her and how she looks. But I don’t want to make her feel bad thinking I’m pointing it out intentionally.

She’s lot an open person. So she’d never tell me it bothered her. Even if it does.

What’s your thoughts??
 

Scarletbegonia

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Does it matter if some woman you don’t know might consider smacking a guy for this, or lov3 it, or be neutral?

open your pie hole and ASK HER.

”hey babe, it occurred to me that when I grab and grope you, you might not like it. Is this because you are fat?”
okay, maybe not those words.
 

Tight_N_Juicy

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I'm an average sized woman in every dimension.

I still get extremely self conscious when he touches my belly. Several factors, but yeah.

I won't speak on her behalf, but myself? I don't like hands on my belly much at all. He tells me he LOVES my tummy. He likes to touch it. I let him sometimes, but others I have to move his hand. Usually to my boobs.

For me it's not about feeling unattractive, it's about my lack of reproductive organs and 3 failed pregnancies. So I wouldn't apply my response to how she may feel.
 

18wheeler

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Does it matter if some woman you don’t know might consider smacking a guy for this, or lov3 it, or be neutral?

open your pie hole and ASK HER.

”hey babe, it occurred to me that when I grab and grope you, you might not like it. Is this because you are fat?”
okay, maybe not those words.
I have. I don’t get a answer that really helps. Like I said. She’s not open like that. She doesn’t want to hurt my feelings because she knows I like it. But I also don’t want to do things that make her self conscious
 
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Tight_N_Juicy

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I have. I don’t get a answer that really helps. Like I said. She’s not open like that. She doesn’t want to hurt my feelings because she knows I like it. But I also don’t want to do things that make her self conscious

You must know her well enough by now to be able to read her body language...

What is her physical self saying when you touch her that way? There's your answer.
 
D

deleted5791141

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a few things:

do you only touch her wobbly bits during sex or at other times as well? If it’s only happening during sex, I would think that might make her self-conscious. However if you are also giving gentle pats or caresses while she’s fully clothed, either at home or out in public, then that might change the way you are making her feel.

I would add, perhaps let her know, in no uncertain terms, that you absolutely love her body, wobbly bits and all, during a non-sexual time. While you’re out in public, quietly, holding hands, when she gives you a hug, when you’re watching TV. It’s at those times that expressing how much you adore her body that she might believe you more than when you’ve just had an orgasm.

Don’t compliment her when people can hear you as she might think you’re doing it to draw attention to her. But do it quietly, so it’s a shared quiet moment between just the both of you. Soft whispered compliments followed by a gentle kiss go a long way. And don’t do it so much that it makes her uncomfortable, but maybe when she least expects it. :)
 

18wheeler

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a few things:

do you only touch her wobbly bits during sex or at other times as well? If it’s only happening during sex, I would think that might make her self-conscious. However if you are also giving gentle pats or caresses while she’s fully clothed, either at home or out in public, then that might change the way you are making her feel.

I would add, perhaps let her know, in no uncertain terms, that you absolutely love her body, wobbly bits and all, during a non-sexual time. While you’re out in public, quietly, holding hands, when she gives you a hug, when you’re watching TV. It’s at those times that expressing how much you adore her body that she might believe you more than when you’ve just had an orgasm.

Don’t compliment her when people can hear you as she might think you’re doing it to draw attention to her. But do it quietly, so it’s a shared quiet moment between just the both of you. Soft whispered compliments followed by a gentle kiss go a long way. And don’t do it so much that it makes her uncomfortable, but maybe when she least expects it. :)
I compliment her and her body constantly. In bed, in public, wherever. She’s beautiful and sexy as hell.
I touch her “wobbly parts” all the time. On the couch. In the car. Making dinner. While we clean or do dishes and especially in bed as we go to sleep, morning, and during sex. He soft curvy tummy, hips and legs are just as sexual to me as her more intimate parts of her body. I find them just as arousing tk me. I’ve made that very clear to her. Which is why she would never tell me she didn’t like it. Becuase she knows it would upset me.
 
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18wheeler

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You must know her well enough by now to be able to read her body language...

What is her physical self saying when you touch her that way? There's your answer.
Honestly. I’m really good at judging her, and other women’s responses to my touch. I’ve always considered that the reason I’m really good at oral sex. I feel and listen to breathing, eyes, the way her muscles and skin react… but I just get no reaction. So I guess in a way, that’s not a bad thing. She doesn’t hate it. But she doesn’t seem to like it either. So… do I continue if she’s just letting me do it?
 

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Many years ago after we had moved to Florida I neglected myself and put on more than a few pounds. One night he came up behind me and began rubbing my shoulders and then he went down to my belly. I felt very self conscious and told him so. He said something like "Don't worry; there's more of you to love."

I started at the gym the very next day. It took almost eight months to reach my target weight.

A couple of years later he remarked that his pants were getting tight. I patted his belly and told him I loved it.

He lost all of his added weight in three weeks.

Must. Control. Fists. :mad::mad::mad:

Some people are not self conscious about their weight at all. I'm very envious of those people. I'm a bit more superficial.
 
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18wheeler

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I’m pretty self conscious of my wobbly bits. I wish I wasn’t, but I am. I agree with @JadedViolet though, it might help me be less self conscious if those bits were adored at other times.
I can confirm I adore those parts any opportunity I can. Not just when having sex. I can’t keep my hands off of her.
 

Scarletbegonia

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Honestly. I’m really good at judging her, and other women’s responses to my touch. I’ve always considered that the reason I’m really good at oral sex. I feel and listen to breathing, eyes, the way her muscles and skin react… but I just get no reaction. So I guess in a way, that’s not a bad thing. She doesn’t hate it. But she doesn’t seem to like it either. So… do I continue if she’s just letting me do it?
No reaction? Almost like she is holding her breath? Or staying still like a rabbit?
I would wonder if someone shamed her once and she’s never felt like she can speak up.
Do you like larger, softer women generally? Is this something that trips your trigger?
 

18wheeler

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No reaction? Almost like she is holding her breath? Or staying still like a rabbit?
I would wonder if someone shamed her once and she’s never felt like she can speak up.
Do you like larger, softer women generally? Is this something that trips your trigger?
Sorry it took me so long to reply. As far as her lack of reaction. I just mean zero. It’s really like I’m not touching her at all. She just lays there as if she’s just allowing me to enjoy myself, but is getting nothing out of it herself. I don’t want to do things just for me. That’s the opposite that I am sexually. I get more pleasure out of GIVING pleasure. Gratifyingly myslef at her expense doesn’t interest me at all.

Now. As far as women. I find each type of female has there own sexiness. But I do tend to find overly curvy and soft women to be the most attractive. My wife was always curvy. I’ve known her since she was ** which has been almost 30yrs. When we began dating in 2013 she was curvy. Wide hips, large breasts, but not really overweight. Now we have been together for 8+ years, 2 kids, and life in general, I’m far more in love with her, and more attracted to her because she’s my wife and the mother of my children and step mother of my older children. Tummy and all, I find her intoxicating. I literally can’t keep my hands off of her body. All of it.
 

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My last bf left me because I admittedly put on quite a bit of weight. I've dated since then and some guys are into it and some aren't. The guy I've been seeing off and on lately is a total chub lover so I've actually been able to relax when he is kneading the dough and it's actually quite soothing and liberating to not have to worry if he thinks it's gross. Especially on my hips/waist. If he like grabs my belly with both hands and shook it I might punch him in the mouth, but gentle squeezing while cuddling is fantastic.

If you've always been like that and she is YOUR WIFE, I would think that she knows you by now. Or did she just get fat recently?

Just make sure she knows you love her and tell her how sexy you find her and you should be fine.
 

18wheeler

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My last bf left me because I admittedly put on quite a bit of weight. I've dated since then and some guys are into it and some aren't. The guy I've been seeing off and on lately is a total chub lover so I've actually been able to relax when he is kneading the dough and it's actually quite soothing and liberating to not have to worry if he thinks it's gross. Especially on my hips/waist. If he like grabs my belly with both hands and shook it I might punch him in the mouth, but gentle squeezing while cuddling is fantastic.

If you've always been like that and she is YOUR WIFE, I would think that she knows you by now. Or did she just get fat recently?

Just make sure she knows you love her and tell her how sexy you find her and you should be fine.
Good lord. Your last boyfriend was a fool. You’re stunning. I’m glad you’re with someone who makes you feel desired and you can relax and enjoy it. That’s what I’m hoping my wife feels like. But I’m but sure she does.

Some of the weight is from having two babies close apart. Shes 30-40lbs heavier than she used to be. But she looks absolutely amazing to me.
 

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Dude, you know the answer. You just don't like it.

This.

@18wheeler My guy likes the fat I put on while I was pregnant, but what he doesn't understand is that I will never EVER like the way my belly jiggles now. I'm basically back to the same weight I was at before we lost her (yeah, she passed away in my womb right as I hit 6 months of gestation) but I can't get that lower belly-wiggle to go away.

He loves it. He truly does. But I fucking HATE it. It's not about feeling beautiful at all. It's way, way more complicated than that.

For your wife it's likely not the same thing but for me? Answering for myself, I vocalized to him directly how much I hate it. Your wife may not be as blunt of a person as I am.
 

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"she's the mother of my children"

Well, my guy has 2 kids from 2 different women. I failed to give birth every time I got pregnant. So, I guess I'm not as sexy to him, right?

Fuck that shit. I know I'm kinda making this a me thing, but FFS there's been a lot of talk about pregnancy birth and bla bla bla.

Fucking annoying as fuck. Maybe I need time out from penisville. And life in general because no one ever shuts the fuck up about having kids.