Happily Addicted to the Web

Pecker

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Happily Addicted to the Web
(to the tune of "Winter Wonderland"):

Doorbell rings, I'm not listenin';
From my mouth, drool is glistenin'
I'm happy -- although my boss let me go,
I'm Happily Addicted to the Web.

All night long, I keep clicking;
Unaware time is ticking;
There's beard on my cheek, same clothes for a week,
I'm Happily Addicted to the Web.

Friends come by, they shake me, sayin' "Yo, man!
Don't you know tonight's the senior prom?"
With a listless shrug, I mutter, "No, man --
I've just discovered Letterman-dot-com!"

I don't phone, don't send faxes;
Don't go out, don't pay taxes.
Who cares if someday they haul me away?
I'm Happily Addicted to the Web.
Happily Addicted to the Web.
Happily Addicted to the Web!