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Discussion in 'Relationships, Discrimination, and Jealousy' started by db03, Jun 22, 2005.
I have had 2 girls tell me that...I don't think I have actually been in love so I really don't throw that word out in a romantic way...It funny though you can tell when a girl loves you and most of the time they will put it out there first...And girls like try to get you to say it at your most vunerable time like in the middle of sex (LOL)...I remember this girl ask me if I loved her right about the time of climax...I was like I could fall in love with you...Don't think she liked that too much because we broke up soon after that after she said I was selfish...
yeah, once, but he was lying.
*Picks up the phone and rings Dr. Rock*
He tells me every single day. In lots of ways.
For 8 1/2 years.
YES, it was something that should move a patriot's heart. My lady friend told me she loves me the first time she stayed with my place - that was last year on July 4th. We had watched the fireworks from my patio, and then went in for some steamy sex, and afterwards she mentioned the L-word.
After going out with my bf for 6 months he took me out on a very romantic night out and told me he loved me and it was beautiful. He was so sweet, after that he didnt stop saying, he was a very mushy guy.
My ex told me often, and he meant it. Neither of us take the word 'love' lightly.
The L-word usually comes up in my relationships, but it took me a long time to figure out that there's a real difference between the "love" in an "I love ya, babe" kind of way and the real gutwrenching feeling you have when you can't live life without having that person by your side, that part of you is gone when they're gone.
I struggle with it a bit myself because I've never really felt that way. I like who I date quite a bit and I get close and I get to missing them, but I feel like I have to have one of my feet planted outside the relationship so I don't get totally swept up and lose myself in the other person. That scares me -- losing myself. Then again, I usually date people for a few months at a time so I don't make it to a point where I start having to delve deeply into feelings.
I would hope that, someday, if I get married, it'll be with a woman that I feel deeply, truly caring for, and that I'll gladly feel good about diving into the relationship. Then again, I'm trying to get my own life figured out for myself. Ain't got time to sweep someone else into my madness.
hung_big: Like Al, I've been told, but it really wasn't love...perhaps unreqquitted on his part.
that sounds a lot like need to me, rather than love.
that sounds a lot like need to me, rather than love.
Al, believe it or not, love is a need for most people. Though I know you well enough to say you have your reasons for being as you are, alot of people crave that love and need it. I don't think I could continue if I really had nobody to love me anymore and I don't know how other people in the world do. Perhaps it's because they have hope of one day finding that same thing.
Alright, enough with the florid stuff. Perhaps we should go wallow in our pools of self-pity, huh Al?
presumably that's why so many people use the word as their justification in fucking up their own lives and other people's, then.
Because that need is so all consuming, in some cases, it does feel like love. But then there are many types of love. I think a person has to be at a point where they dont need the other person to prop them up all the time, and it is then that they can truly find or give love. Love is not fear. Do many people find that? Probably not. Do people confuse that with love? Absolutely. When you need, that is selfish emotion. Love has to be so that you want the best for the other person, even if it isnt you. Can it hurt? Oh yeah! But when you get to the other side you are glad you had that experience. I have had someone tell me they loved me in that way, but I know it was not love but need. They had all the pieces in their life put together and they thought it was time to get married and they tried to plug me in to that space. IF I had taken that person up on their offer they would have been miserable as would I.
A few people have told me they love me, only a few meant it.
I'm very stingy with the L word. If I tell someone I love them, I mean it. I'm not one for airport "I love you"'s.
I would say the same thing. It used to just roll off my tongue, but I learned a valuable lesson when I was 13, through my mother. I can now only say it to anyone. But, there is of course more than one "I love you" to me. I think there is the friend-like types and the romantic way. However, I don't throw the terms around lightly in either case.
Many people have told me they loved me, only one meant it
I certainly do not throw "I love you" around that much. I won't say it unless I really mean it. I may think that I am in love with someone but I usually sit on those emotions for a while to make sure that I am actually feeling that.
More of my problem is that I have a hard time believing most people that say that they love me. Do you find that common?
Most people use the word love as a so called magic key. In hopes of unlocking the bedroom door, help from others and attaining someone else's personal belongings.
There are very few I've come across who've said that word with no strings attached.......who expected nothing in return.....but love.......