I'm curious, has your parents marriage, influenced your adult romantic relationships?
Did your parents have a good/happy marriage? If so, does that inspire you to one day share the same type of relationship with another person?
Or if your parents did not have a good/happy marriage; do you think that has influenced you in your concious desire to never marry. For some people I know in real life their parents unhappy to volatile marriages are the reason they subconciously never settle down with one person.
I always thought my parents had a great marriage because they never argue. Don't get me wrong, they do disagree but I have never witnessed any screaming or yelling because my mother doesn't like that. They will be married 45 years on July 5th and I have honestly never heard either one raise their voice to the other in anger. We weren't even allowed to yell from one end of the house to the other that the phone was for her. Yes, I thought that was weird as a child, I still do. Little did I know then my mom is OCD about a lot of things.
What I witnessed growing up were disagreements in conversational tones of voice which usually ended with my dad retreating to the garage or some other corner of the house. A few days or weeks later something would have been purchased which mom desired but which dad thought we/she didn't need. He would then retaliate by purchasing something equally or more expensive than she had. The worst 'fight' if you can even call it that, resulted in the Ranch mink/Troy-Bilt Chipper argument of 1984. I checked the Troy-Bilt website, they no longer sell the 6'x5' tall monstrosity he got out of that deal. For all I know he may have purchased the industrial version.
What did I learn from my dear parents about male/female relationships?
1) Never marry a man who you deem beneath you socio-economically. Marry an equal or better.
2) When you argue the woman gets her way 90% of the time.
3) If you know you're wrong cry. This effectively ends the fight and you get your way.
4) Never use your children as pawns against your mate. They always know and will learn to resent your behavior.
Regarding the above, I have to say: #1 If I have to hear my mom say one more time how she, "never should have married a simple farm boy" I will scream! #2 Never seemed fair to me. Logistically, shouldn't it be closer to 50/50 or 60/40? #3 always pissed me off about mom. It still does, especially when she tries to manipulate me with her tears. Consequently, I am a woman who never uses tears as a weapon. In fact, usually I will hide to cry. :redface:
Imagine my shock when I grew up and my long-term bf couldn't see that I was right and he was wrong. I'm very pragmatic, if I lay out all available facts and you counter with no, or that's stupid. Then I'm right . . . I win, end of discussion. My ex-bf was of French/Irish ancestry and his motto was, "Next to loving, I like fighting best." In retrospect, how we lasted 12 years is a mystery to me. I guess it's because, with the exception of 18 months, we never lived in the same state at the same time. It's true, "absence does make the heart grow fonder."
Did your parents have a good/happy marriage? If so, does that inspire you to one day share the same type of relationship with another person?
Or if your parents did not have a good/happy marriage; do you think that has influenced you in your concious desire to never marry. For some people I know in real life their parents unhappy to volatile marriages are the reason they subconciously never settle down with one person.
I always thought my parents had a great marriage because they never argue. Don't get me wrong, they do disagree but I have never witnessed any screaming or yelling because my mother doesn't like that. They will be married 45 years on July 5th and I have honestly never heard either one raise their voice to the other in anger. We weren't even allowed to yell from one end of the house to the other that the phone was for her. Yes, I thought that was weird as a child, I still do. Little did I know then my mom is OCD about a lot of things.
What I witnessed growing up were disagreements in conversational tones of voice which usually ended with my dad retreating to the garage or some other corner of the house. A few days or weeks later something would have been purchased which mom desired but which dad thought we/she didn't need. He would then retaliate by purchasing something equally or more expensive than she had. The worst 'fight' if you can even call it that, resulted in the Ranch mink/Troy-Bilt Chipper argument of 1984. I checked the Troy-Bilt website, they no longer sell the 6'x5' tall monstrosity he got out of that deal. For all I know he may have purchased the industrial version.
What did I learn from my dear parents about male/female relationships?
1) Never marry a man who you deem beneath you socio-economically. Marry an equal or better.
2) When you argue the woman gets her way 90% of the time.
3) If you know you're wrong cry. This effectively ends the fight and you get your way.
4) Never use your children as pawns against your mate. They always know and will learn to resent your behavior.
Regarding the above, I have to say: #1 If I have to hear my mom say one more time how she, "never should have married a simple farm boy" I will scream! #2 Never seemed fair to me. Logistically, shouldn't it be closer to 50/50 or 60/40? #3 always pissed me off about mom. It still does, especially when she tries to manipulate me with her tears. Consequently, I am a woman who never uses tears as a weapon. In fact, usually I will hide to cry. :redface:
Imagine my shock when I grew up and my long-term bf couldn't see that I was right and he was wrong. I'm very pragmatic, if I lay out all available facts and you counter with no, or that's stupid. Then I'm right . . . I win, end of discussion. My ex-bf was of French/Irish ancestry and his motto was, "Next to loving, I like fighting best." In retrospect, how we lasted 12 years is a mystery to me. I guess it's because, with the exception of 18 months, we never lived in the same state at the same time. It's true, "absence does make the heart grow fonder."