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Hard-n-Deep

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Fancied a man with which you've had some short pleasant conversations and mild flirting with over a short period of time say a few weeks or so, and then a day comes when you see him spending time and being close with another women that you don't know, and as a consequence you completely shut off.

I'll give you some examples, you don't look at him, don't acknowledge him, and when you do have to you talk to him you act like you've never met before.

My basic understanding of this, is that she's protecting her feelings. Also she might think he's a ladies man.

But as a woman can you go a bit deeper on this topic?
 

Enid

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wait. so you are saying if a potential romantic love interest i have is seen engaging with another woman is suddenly a non-option??

i don't know! probably not, but it could depend. if the man in question is seen kissing or acting very physically intimate with other woman in question i would be like OH HELL NO and i would never speak to him again. i would assume he's already involved and lied about being single or he's kind of a player and it's a no go for me. hard pass

if he was just chatting and being friendly it'd be not a prob at all
 

Hard-n-Deep

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wait. so you are saying if a potential romantic love interest i have is seen engaging with another woman is suddenly a non-option??

i don't know! probably not, but it could depend. if the man in question is seen kissing or acting very physically intimate with other woman in question i would be like OH HELL NO and i would never speak to him again. i would assume he's already involved and lied about being single or he's kind of a player and it's a no go for me. hard pass

if he was just chatting and being friendly it'd be not a prob at all
No romance, no previous dating... as the bold line says.
 

Enid

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i am a woman, i answered as a woman

if i was considering a man as a potential mate or playfriend or dating partner (whatever), and i saw him being close with another woman, it may very well not matter to me at all or it may matter very much. it depends on what i picked up on in my gut while i saw the man and the woman interacting.

if the woman you are asking about shut down on you, she either saw something in your other interaction(s) with the other woman or she is gunshy in general and decided to be protective of herself. maybe she is prideful and wants only your attention.

or maybe she simply lost interest.
 

Hard-n-Deep

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i am a woman, i answered as a woman

if i was considering a man as a potential mate or playfriend or dating partner (whatever), and i saw him being close with another woman, it may very well not matter to me at all or it may matter very much. it depends on what i picked up on in my gut while i saw the man and the woman interacting.

if the woman you are asking about shut down on you, she either saw something in your other interaction(s) with other woman or she is gunshy in general and decided to be protective of herself. maybe she is prideful and wants only your attention.

or maybe she simply lost interest.
But, if she simply lost interest, she'd treat like anyone else. Do you see my point?
 

Enid

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But, if she simply lost interest, she'd treat like anyone else. Do you see my point?


i....don't know? i think so, maybe. if she cut you out of her life there is a reason. she is hurt or saw something she did not like.

can you not just ask her?

if not, then let her be cuz i would guess she wants to be left alone

other women might be able to offer a diff perspective.
 
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Enid

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oh well, to answer your question of if i have done this before -- YES. however, i really just mean cut a potential love interest out based on something i saw or caught a whiff of.

im not a very jealousy type so if i saw a flirty friend with another woman this alone does not bother me. not at all

but i have also no qualms cutting someone clean out of my life if i learned they were not who they said.

i have the ability to excise all excess fat or needless crap. it can happen

i would ask this woman you are asking about, it sounds like you care about what she thinks -- unless she won't talk to you in which case just respect her space then and maybe she will contact you eventually
 

Enid

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Also this is not by any means an isolated case.


do you mean not an isolated case for *you*?

cuz if that is the case than maybe something is going on!

all ya can do is ask, ask without expectations or designs, and hope you get something helpful in return

otherwise again i guess if someone just cuts you out COMPLETELY i'd say just respect it and move on

unless i suppose you are close with someone who is close with her and you can ask that person if they know anything they are willing to share regarding her thoughts on you

if you were just flirty friends for a short while, then it doesn't really matter too much does it?
 

Hard-n-Deep

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do you mean not an isolated case for *you*?

cuz if that is the case than maybe something is going on!

all ya can do is ask, ask without expectations or designs, and hope you get something helpful in return

otherwise again i guess if someone just cuts you out COMPLETELY i'd say just respect it and move on

unless i suppose you are close with someone who is close with her and you can ask that person if they know anything they are willing to share regarding her thoughts on you

if you were just flirty friends for a short while, then it doesn't really matter too much does it?
I'll address your response line by line in numerical order.
1. yes
2. hmmmm
3. I agree
4. This is not what I asked
5. I'd rather not. However I have spoke to women outside of her circle of friends and now posed the question on here.
6. My mind is deeply curios about women's minds. Please understand I don't have feelings for this women.

The point of this post is not me seeking advice, but rather an insight into this behavior. Basically, unbiased opinion that comes from personal experience.
 
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Women are individuals. Just because @Enid seemed to give some thoughts you didn't want to hear doesn't make them any less valid.

The scenario you describe of someone -just- talking wouldn't result in me avoiding someone, more than likely. If I found out something about someone that I strongly disapprove of and am otherwise not invested (a few good conversations), I have zero qualms about letting them know I'm not interested.

I don't have insight into this behavior "as a woman" because I'm an individual who wouldn't behave in that manner. It isn't having a uterus that would give me insight into something or not. I'm blunt and honest. I hate having my time wasted and I endeavor not to waste other people's time. If my attraction to someone changed I would just tell them, if I felt we had enough going on between us previously to make doing so reasonable. If it was just a couple of conversations, and I am often a bit flirty, I don't owe anyone shit.
 
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As a woman, if it were me, it would probably mean I'd seen something in you/your behaviour I didn't like and I'm not invested enough for a conversation about it, I just want out.

If I were still interested, I would have a word with myself for feeling petty jealousy and you wouldn't know from my behaviour that anything had ever been wrong because I would care what you thought of me.
 

Hard-n-Deep

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As a woman, if it were me, it would probably mean I'd seen something in you/your behaviour I didn't like and I'm not invested enough for a conversation about it, I just want out.

If I were still interested, I would have a word with myself for feeling petty jealousy and you wouldn't know from my behaviour that anything had ever been wrong because I would care what you thought of me.
Your comment is logical and to me makes sense. Really I'm now wondering who's going to admit to being like the women I described. But as I said before this is not a one off, there really are women out there like that.
 
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Your comment is logical and to me makes sense. Really I'm now wondering who's going to admit to being like the women I described. But as I said before this is not a one off, there really are women out there like that.

There is no "admit". If it were a behavior I exhibited I would say so. I don't know or care enough about anyone on here to try and soften words, other than my sweetie and he hasn't been active on LPSG in years. People get blunt truth from me. You act like women are lying, just because we didn't give an answer you wanted. I think @AlteredEgo was right in your other thread. You're coming off as an asshole.
 

Hard-n-Deep

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There is no "admit". If it were a behavior I exhibited I would say so. I don't know or care enough about anyone on here to try and soften words, other than my sweetie and he hasn't been active on LPSG in years. People get blunt truth from me. You act like women are lying, just because we didn't give an answer you wanted. I think @AlteredEgo was right in your other thread. You're coming off as an asshole.
What makes you think I was thinking about YOU?

Potentially there could be many future responses. I put this post out today.
 
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What makes you think I was thinking about YOU?

Potentially there could be many future responses. I put this post out today.

What makes you think I was just talking about me? Most of the regularly posting women on here don't bullshit. There isn't an "admitting" anything with them, either.
 
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AlteredEgo

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There is no "admit". If it were a behavior I exhibited I would say so. I don't know or care enough about anyone on here to try and soften words, other than my sweetie and he hasn't been active on LPSG in years. People get blunt truth from me. You act like women are lying, just because we didn't give an answer you wanted. I think @AlteredEgo was right in your other thread. You're coming off as an asshole.

I broke my personal rule. I didn't read the whole thread, nor check post history, and I didn't recognize him.

*sigh*
 
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