Well, Curious, in this particular relationship, initially the important thing was that my partner had a sense of both comfort and safety in a sexual setting (she had had a pretty bad introduction to sex and relationships in general, which clearly affected her subsequent relationships). I also spoke pretty openly and directly about her attempts to get off and aksed her what was/wasn't working. These basically (combined with a general sense that we BOTH were going to have fun, no matter what the outcome) set up the "first" orgasm.
After that, well, the other attempts were really adapted to the moment. As said elsewhere, it probably had as much to do with the fact that it was me (i.e., the person who had helped her achieved both orgasm and a sense of comfort/security) as any particualr technique. Nevertheless, the techniques were really varied - sometimes gentle, sometimes rough, sometimes fast, sometimes incredibly prolonged.
That reminds me, there was one orgasm that took an incredibly long period of time and was the culmination of me basically barely and slowly brushing my lips ALL over her body.