He says he doesn't celebrate Valentines Day

Discussion in 'Women's Issues' started by Rommette, Jan 22, 2010.

  1. Rommette

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    This is my first year to have a boyfriend for Valentines Day. I always got one after or broke up with one before Valentines Day. Recently I have a boyfriend and i'm so excited. The other day he says "I dont celebrate Valentines Day just so you know" and I got sad. He hasn't been in a relationship since the 11th grade so even if he has had a gf for Valentines Day he hasn't had one as an adult. What should I say? I cant make him celebrate Valentines Day if he doesn't want to.

    For the record....he isnt married, or cheating or......anything
     
  2. ManlyBanisters

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    Tell him he fucking well does celebrate Valentine's Day because you do (not to mention if he wants his cock sucking ever again!) and that you are going to get him a gift / do something special and if he doesn't get you one / do something in return he's in fucking trouble.

    Cheap bastard. Tell him I said that.
     
  3. nealin

    nealin New Member

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    If he doesn't celebrate the day itself then I hope he treats you like everyday is Valentines day. I think I would ask his reason for not.
     
  4. Joll

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    I was brought up not celebrating it (and other things) so it may freak him out to have to do that - but...no reason why he can't make it up to you in other ways. ;)

    Go for a meal another night...and get him to treat ya good. :)
     
  5. StraightCock4Her

    StraightCock4Her New Member

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    Fucking women and valentine's day. Fuck V day and fuck anyone who needs chocolate to confirm some sort of desire or love.

    Money isn't love and v day is nothing but money.

    If you must do something, tell him you just want a romantic dinner that night and that it's not about the holiday, it's about your love.

    Or some emotionally charged bull shit.
     
  6. AlphaMale

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    Yeah, that sounds like a cop out to me... every romantic guy wants to celebrate V Day with his SO! :biggrin1:
     
  7. helgaleena

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    He wants to avoid it because of some past bad experience. If you really feel warm toward him and want to give him a valentine anyway, go for it! Just give it to him some other day. Then explain: 'You don't like that day, so I will just show you how I feel now instead.'

    If I recall from another thread Rommette, he was the one who wanted to be boyfriend instead of fuckbuddy. He doesn't know how to do this, didn't get a set of instructions, and neither did you. So just be yourself, and sensible, and a goddess of love.
     
  8. KTF40

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    Seriously. My experience with Valentine's Day is that it is just a day where women feel entitled to a $150+ dinner on my dime. And I'm only a student! Imagine what women will be expecting of me once I have an actual job.
     
  9. AbeFroman

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    If your new dating someone your serious with and its a fairly new relationship, you gotta observe it. Although you could go out, first class, the weekend before and after for less than the prefixe mean most place sling at you on VDay.
     
  10. exwhyzee

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    The thing I hate about VD is that most guys can just go throught he motions and buy a big heart-shaped box of chocolate and a bouquet of red roses, give his significant other a big kiss and wish her a happy standard commercial Valentines Day...and all is good. I think most would probably accept that as "appropriate and nice". Its expected. TV advertisements tell us so. I dont like Christmas for the same reason...its all a routine. Why should I fall in line with everyone else just because Hallmark and Cadbury tell me to?

    I'd rather find our own day(s), outside of the commercial calendar, that we take time-out for each other on our own terms...and have a really special and unique time together. I would think that would show a significant other how you really feel...without falling into the insincerity and obligation of a standard commercial holiday.

    Of course...I'm single...so I guess that's proof in the pudding that I'm off base. :rolleyes:
     
  11. B_Mademoiselle Rouge

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    Trust me, after 11 years, valentines day isnt the big cheese. It's only heart breaking to have all these romantic ideas of what you will do for him, or what you think he is going to do for you and when he doesnt do it because he didnt know thats what you wanted (and you didnt tell him because you didnt want to ruin the surprise in case he thought of it) its just a huge disappointing day.

    We look at what others are doing for their lovers on V-day and get these grandiose expectations and its just a huge let down.

    Money is tight for many of us, its better to just rent a movie and make dinner, or go out to eat several days before the V-day rush.

    I'm happy with some white roses (yes those are my favorite) and dinner at my fave restaurant NOT during the busy holiday where i cant hear what he's saying because its so loud in there. My fave restaurant costs about $50 max for the both of us so its never a problem for him to take me there.

    He's afraid of failing and fucking up like most guys are afraid of. We make it such a huge thing where they just give up because they know they arent going to make you happy because all of your other friends/family have better stories about what they got.

    Make it different, ease his worries and offer to make HIM dinner or have a picnic in the park just the two of you. It's not about the gifts and honestly its just a Hallmark Holiday.

    My husband shows his love for me by scraping the ice off my windshield before he leaves for work, not by buying me things on Valentine's day.

    He's not romantic and i learned a long long time ago not to expect him to be. Some guys are romantic, many arent and thats ok. He is who he is.
     
  12. Daisy

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    OMG! I sure as hell hope not all guys are this bitter and ignorant. "women feel entitled"? Gimme a break. I don't know what kind of women you attract but we are not all shallow gold digging whores.

    As fas as saying he doesn't celebrate thats a load of crap. Men tend not to be terribly romantic so yes, guys, we do need a day to celebrate the relationship. He could easily write a note or make you dinner or even just desert. It's not all about expensive dinners and bouquets of roses. It totally is a cop out to say he doesn't celebrate especially if he knows you're disappointed by it. If my guy said that crap I'd be looking for a new boyfriend :tongue:
     
  13. Rikter8

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    I'll be celebrating V-day alone. I plan on sitting on the porch waiting for cupid....with my shotgun...

    You don't have to celebrate Valentines day by dishing out lots of cash. That's not what its about.

    Find a nice restaraunt that you both can get a good meal at. Applebees, Bennigans, Chilis, etc. You don't need a 5 star restaraunt.
    Just tell him you want to go out to eat, and that's all. Just to spend time with him.
    Or a Movie. Relatively cheap.

    If he declines - Fly my dear...Fly.
     
  14. nealin

    nealin New Member

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    Yeah so its a big commercial holiday making you feel like if you dont spend money you dont love... I dont think that is what a woman wants. What about greeting her at the door with a drink and a gift. How about calling out for chinese and instead of watching TV you talk to her and maybe rub her feet. How about surprising her with a bubble bath for two with candles and all that stuff. Women are not visual creatures like men, show a guy some porn and he's ready to go. A woman takes finesse, they are more mental beings. They like the build up to sex, a goodbye kiss in the morning, a couple phone calls during the day just to say hello and you want them. Its the simple things that make the most difference. I know this and Im gay!
     
  15. Joll

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    That's a really awesome post. :smile:
     
  16. KTF40

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    How am I ignorant? This is my experience. This shit has actually happend, I'm not making this stuff up. I'm sure there are plenty who don't expect the guy to pay for dinner on vday, but I haven't been in a relationship with any of them.
     
  17. rob_just_rob

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    Either he's cheap, or he's had a bad experience. Check if it's the latter before assuming the former.
     
  18. Smooth88

    Smooth88 New Member

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    Word the only thing I want for vday is her company.
     
  19. trackdude

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    You do need more sense than that though, fuck, can't you at least find some interesting or original local fare?
     
  20. Principessa

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    Is he Jehovah's Witness? If not then he has no excuse. This does not bode well dear. If it really bothers you to be alone on Valentine's Day then go to a sports bar. They are teeming with single and often horny, but nice men on Valentine's Day. :cool: Even if it is for religious reasons he needs to step up to the plate and act like he knows, cause that is NOT your religion.

    QFT! Gotta go with the Porcine Miss M on this one.
     
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