He Won't Kiss Me - Am I Wrong To Let Him Go?

toader

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Am I wrong to let him go because he won't kiss me.....? He drives me beyond crazy in every good way possible. He has a heart and soul that are the envy of ba-zillions. He is a truly good guy in every way. He has a body to die for. On just about every level we get along like a house on fire. We finish sentences for each other. We say the same thing at the same time. BUT - he won't kiss me in the passionate way that I want him to. And passionate kissing for me is a huge part of who I am and what I enjoy. In short - it is a real show stopper for me if not done. He'll do everything else that I ask. And I do everything that he asks. We please each other in so many ways, in so many setting, in so many places - and thoroughly enjoy pleasing each other. BUT - he won't kiss me with those deep passionate kisses - and it's been many, MANY months now that we've been together. Started last year. Repeatedly tells me that kissing is not his thing. So I need to know - am I wrong to let him go because he wont kiss me.....? Or I am being a total and complete idiot and selfish jerk thinking only of myself and what I want and not what he wants....? Help!!!
 
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cedarizzo

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My first boyfriend wouldn't kiss me either. We were together for almost 7 years and I think he gave me a peck on the lips less than 10 times within 7 years. It really bothered me that he wouldn't kiss.

After reading your post, it is obvious that kissing is important to you. There is nothing that is going to change him if he won't kiss you by now. I lived for 7 years without kissing and it bothered me. Don't wait it out, he isn't going to change.
 

Brodie888

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Firstly, never expect anyone to change. Chances are that they won't.

But having said that, you have to weigh the good and the bad. Nobody will ever be perfect and tick every box. Are the unticked boxes really worth ending a relationship considering the boxes that are ticked? Only you can know this.
 
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Am I wrong to let him go because he won't kiss me.....? He drives me beyond crazy in every good way possible. He has a heart and soul that are the envy of ba-zillions. He is a truly good guy in every way. He has a body to die for. On just about every level we get along like a house on fire. We finish sentences for each other. We say the same thing at the same time. BUT - he won't kiss me in the passionate way that I want him to. And passionate kissing for me is a huge part of who I am and what I enjoy. In short - it is a real show stopper for me if not done. He'll do everything else that I ask. And I do everything that he asks. We please each other in so many ways, in so many setting, in so many places - and thoroughly enjoy pleasing each other. BUT - he won't kiss me with those deep passionate kisses - and it's been many, MANY months now that we've been together. Started last year. Repeatedly tells me that kissing is not his thing. So I need to know - am I wrong to let him go because he wont kiss me.....? Or I am being a total and complete idiot and selfish jerk thinking only of myself and what I want and not what he wants....? Help!!!
I think you are putting an awful lot of weight on this one thing. It must mean a lot to you, perhaps almost as a symbol of romantic love and desire. It does sound as if your relationship is quite 'cosy' and that you might be more like very good friends than lovers. I agree with the posts above: he won’t change so you have to weigh it all up. Personally I could live with that but not, say, with acts of meanness or duplicity. Only you can say what's most important for you obviously. This is not meant to be nasty but another angle to consider, if only to rule out, is whether something is putting him off from deep kissing. You know what I'm saying: bad breath. Check it out :)
 

tito21

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Hmm... i’m not trying to be rude. Maybe you have bad breath? Do you brush/scrap your tongue with a tongue cleaner? Bad breath can be a real mood killer! Heck! I’ll


Good oral hygiene is my religion! I brush my teeth twice a day (sometimes 3X) + flossing that takes 20 to 30 mins in the bathroom. My house mate told me that i’m obsessed and possessed.

When meeting a guy, his oral health is the first thing I pay attention to and I’ll only kiss him if he has good oral hygiene (after knowing him).

My only advice is, if you like kissing so much and your bf doesn’t like doing it. Why not get one of this sucker? You can go to town with it whenever and for however long you want!

Kissing Machine / Ben Cowden
 

MrTMT

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One thing I know for sure as a measurement if someone really really loves you or not, it's in the kiss. Verbal, facial expression and other things can be deceiving. If you're into romantic things, then you made the right choice.
 

toader

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In my original post I guess I should have said bad breath is not an issue here. We both take personal hygiene very seriously.

And to the one or two individuals coming back at me trying not to be rude, I didn't post this thread to receive such responses. I wrote this out of a genuine desire for some advice and help which is what I thought this forum was about.
 
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In my original post I guess I should have said bad breath is not an issue here. We both take personal hygiene very seriously.

And to the one or two individuals coming back at me trying not to be rude, I didn't post this thread to receive such responses. I wrote this out of a genuine desire for some advice and help which is what I thought this forum was about.
Er, I think I gave you some genuine, well meant and helpful advice. In the end only you can decide what you want to do.
 

JusSum

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My reasons for not wanting to kiss are usually bad breath, just keeping it about sex, I find the person repulsive but horny or we tried before and the person was horrible kisser or I didn't feel any type of passion from them when we kissed in the past...Or unusual bumps or sores around the lips or mouth

9 out of 10 it's due to bad breath or my suspicion of an STI