Heard This Morning...

Clewiston1

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I woke up this morning in someone else's bed. I knew whose bed it was. Jody walks in, smiles and says "Oh look, a naked man in my bed". I was laying on my back with no sheets covering me. She climbs into bed and starts holding my cock.

She says "Scheila told me you had a big one. I had to find out for myself". I say to her "Scheila told you that?" acting all innocent. She nods and says "I love your tan line. Guys with a nice tanned ass are always good in bed". She climbs on top and says "I'm gonna ride you, OK". She said it like a statement, not a question. it was good. It was sweaty. Jody grunted and gasped her way to an orgasm. I yelled out my orgasm.

Later, I'm taking a shower and the glass door opens and there's Jody, still naked. She says "Oh look, a naked man in my shower." She walks in and starts rubbing my cock with soap. We kiss and I start grabbing her rack. She says "I'm gonna suck you off, OK". She said it like a statement and not a question. She drops to her knees. I came again. God, my knees were weak.

I just had to share this story with you. I'm not trying to out-brag everyone else here. Getting laid twice and a blowjob in one evening/morning was just great. I did not even get in trouble for coming into work a little late. Maybe the smile on my face gave me away.
 

Clewiston1

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Story's poorly written, but I don't get the title. What did you hear this morning? Furthermore, who the fuck spells their name Scheila?

Gee, I'm terribly fucking sorry that it's poorly written. I'll be sure to take some writing classes so the next time I have a great sex experience, my telling of it will won't offend your sensibilities.

Asshole...
 

strauss1

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Sorry, it's not.

oh we know. :rolleyes:

It's fairly easy to separate the works of fiction from the actual stories. No one tells a real story like that.

Joice walked in, panting with her top off. "I must have that large cock my sister told me about". Joice began to suck me off, saying, "It's even bigger than my sister said". I was hard. Just then Joice's mother Pawla walked by with the laundry. "Oh my god! That cock is huge! I must suck it" said Pawla while she took her top off. Pawla was able to huff and puff herself to orgasm just from sucking me, I yelped out my orgasm. Boy was I hungry for a sandwich. Joyce nodded as Paula quivered with delight. Still later, Joyce's sister Daneyelle came in to some unknown location and said, joyce have you been sucking on my man's huge dick??? it's just really really awful, horribly bad writing.

And no, you don't have to assault people for pointing that out to you, but it's just not how ANYONE would tell that story if it actually happened.
 
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Clewiston1

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oh we know. :rolleyes:

It's fairly easy to separate the works of fiction from the actual stories. No one tells a real story like that.

Joice walked in, panting with her top off. "I must have that large cock my sister told me about". Joice began to suck me off, saying, "It's even bigger than my sister said". I was hard. Just then Joice's mother Pawla walked by with the laundry. "Oh my god! That cock is huge! I must suck it" said Pawla while she took her top off. Pawla was able to huff and puff herself to orgasm just from sucking me, I yelped out my orgasm. Boy was I hungry for a sandwich. Joyce nodded as Paula quivered with delight. Still later, Joyce's sister Daneyelle came in to some unknown location and said, joyce have you been sucking on my man's huge dick??? it's just really really awful, horribly bad writing.

And no, you don't have to assault people for pointing that out to you, but it's just not how ANYONE would tell that story if it actually happened.

Again, I'm terribly fucking sorry that my version of the story didn't live up to your literary expectations either. What should I have done? Should it gave gone like this...?

Jody approached me with lust in her eyes, her nipples erect. She stared at my engorged manhood...

OR

Jody was one horny bitch. She wanted to get fucked and I was her super stud. She screamed out "No one can fuck me like you can, lover!" I stuck my huge fucking cock in her a lot of times...

Didn't like my version of the story? Didn't find it believable? Too fucking bad.
 

D_Bubba_Butter

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Whether it's fiction or not, I think Clewiston should be commended for taking writing classes to improve what he's posting.

I'm looking forward to seeing the fruits of his labours.
 

Deno

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Writing classes to post in this forum? Maybe I should go to law school to work at Burger King. Wish I found a well hung naked man in my bed. I wouldn't care if he could spell cat.
 

D_Bubba_Butter

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Writing classes to post in this forum? Maybe I should go to law school to work at Burger King. Wish I found a well hung naked man in my bed. I wouldn't care if he could spell cat.

Writing classes to improve writing. A law degree to flip a burger.

I see how that works :rolleyes:


I'm not going ask what you do for a living...
 
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Oh man, I'm laughing my ass off reading this forum. I picture Clewiston just beat red with steam coming out of his ears.
 

kenny233

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This is great! I liked the story, whether it is true or fiction. I also pondered the relation of the title to the story. I liked reading the comments that followed, disputing the truth or fiction of the post. I don't understand the law school to work at Burger King analogy, but it is amusing, nonetheless.

Thanks for providing the levity for my much needed break from my work this morning :)