I think it's very helpful when you're going through a hard time to go talk to a professional. Easy for me to say because I'm studying to be a psychotherapist I suppose. But sometimes...being able to talk it out, analyze it and communicate how you're feeling and getting a professional opinion helps.
Talking about your problem helps to an extent, but then at some point you have to get over talking the same story about why you were dumped (that word is harsh, but it's the truth). You have to move on by finding way to feel better about the break up.
And often anger is the best feeling thought from depression, if you feel powerless about a break up. But I don't advocate staying angry, just enough until someone can move up to feeling less angry, and more frustrated, and eventually to feeling more hopeful.
Psychotherapy often asks to examine our problems but to never solve them. Analyzing our problems of why we attract people into our experience never solves anything. It does help though at understanding the problem. Letting go, by moving on, and finding a way to feel differently about it, will actually be the solution to the problem.
Theirs a happy medium between moving on and getting a hobby and working out what happened so you can move on.
Getting a hobby is all about distraction. And distraction helps you stop focusing on the breakup, and makes you focus on other things. When I had a bad breakup, I worked a lot, and it got my mind off the breakup. Focusing on why you were dumped, and talking about it, just puts you in circles where you analyze over and over about why this happened.
If someone wants to move on, after they've had a bad breakup, they need to stop analyzing it, and just find a way to feel better about it.
For me, at least, this is really the best way.
